To think that if not being able to go for a piss on your own is true then I'd rather just adopt a ready made one?

(218 Posts)
LollyLaDrumstick Mon 06-May-13 13:17:17

Always thought I wanted babies, but the stuff I see on here is absolutely bewildering.

Having to eat one handed every meal because you have a baby clinging onto you? Not being able to leave them alone for 5 minutes to have a shower? Getting interrupted when you're having a 30 second piss? Not even being able to go for a piss in the first place as they cry when you leave the room?

Is this true? Or is there a type of parent that seems to make out what an awful time they had in baby years so they are perceived as a superior parent?

My hard-hat is well and truly donned wink but please, do let me know the truth about this so I'm not taken by surprised in the future. It all seems a bit stressful!

serin Mon 06-May-13 13:20:37

Everyone does it differently, mine have never really followed me to the loo (but the dog does grin ).

For every one little thing you sacrifice the rewards are greater.

DomesticCEO Mon 06-May-13 13:23:01

The eating one handed thing doesn't last long - in fact I'd forgotten about it until I read your post!

Children are amazing but bloody hard work - if you're ambivalent I wouldn't bother having them tbh!

Mrsrobertduvall Mon 06-May-13 13:23:05

I managed to pee in peace, and have a shower....they were put in their chairs or cot.
You can't hold them every minute of the day!

our bathroom is downstairs. It does help with having a shower because i could always still talk to them while i was in there, they used to sit the other side of the baby gate and natter to me.

The pissing one is true though, i dont get much bathroom privacy.. if they're not crying they're knocking and asking how long i'll be.

tbh, you get used to it.. the only time i get ratty about it is when DH is home and fails to keep them away from the door!

issimma Mon 06-May-13 13:25:13

It all happens, especially in the early days, but not every meal and every wee --usually-.

kotinka Mon 06-May-13 13:26:03

yes it's all true at times. didn't have a hot drink for years! I did get to go for a piss when they slept. I got a playpen so I could have a shower or shit and know they were safe but they hated it and cried when put in. it was necessary at times though. it gets better.

Fairylea Mon 06-May-13 13:27:33

Happened to me with both of mine, but that stage doesn't last long! Few weeks at most. But yes, babies are hard work and they do tip your life upside down. I think sleep deprivation is the worst part..nothing can prepare you for that. And I'm lucky .. both mine slept through from 10 weeks. Most people suffer far longer than that!

jacks365 Mon 06-May-13 13:27:35

I've just got used to having company in the bathroom and don't think anything of it, hopefully will help when potty training as she sees it as normal. I've eaten a few meals one handed or bouncing chair with a foot. Its not much of a hardship to do.

MysteriousHamster Mon 06-May-13 13:28:37

It's true but it doesn't last forever. I have a 2.5 year old and sometimes I'm allowed to wee in peace, sometimes not smile

I mostly have hot meals that I can eat with two hands, but sometimes I spend half of it cutting his food in half.

In the early weeks or months it's hard - and it also changes. eg when they're a baby you might be able to leave the room and have a shower, but when they're six months old they might wail when you try it.

Some people might wallow in shouting their struggles, for many it is simply tough and they need to be able to talk about it here or to friends. It can be tough and lovely - that's how it was for me. It gets easier and nothing is as all-encompassing as a newborn's needs.

'Ready made' children (both just older and older and adopted), just challenge you in different ways.

Peevish Mon 06-May-13 13:28:48

It is stressful, but surely that's a foregone conclusion once you have a child? I would be lying if I said the first year of my lovely baby's life hadn't been very hard in ways I would not have understood before having a child, and the physical stuff like no more solo peeing etc was the least of it. But the love is also astonishing in ways I could never have foreseen. I think Anne Enright says somewhere that after you have a child your life gets much harder and much better.

wonderingsoul Mon 06-May-13 13:28:55

babies..
babies are easy (in my expearance) both babies where dreamsextreamly laid back, untill they hit 3.

even if i had to carry them about every where becasue they would cry when put down... imo still easier then toddlers and children.

babies stay where there put, you dont find them trying to jump of the fridge freezers, you dont have to deal with p lay ground poltics, you dont have to worry when their out of your sight.. at school.. at friends.. and they dont back chat you.

point is. cherish the baby stage, your be looking back at it in foundness becasue things only get harder the older they get. grin

quoteunquote Mon 06-May-13 13:30:14

At most only fifty percent of the time, as you split any demands with the other parent.

Sparhawk Mon 06-May-13 13:30:37

My daughter sleeps in her bouncing chair if I bounce her with my foot, I do everything I need to do around her sleep routine, with no hassle. Never had to eat one handed. I'm using cloth nappies too and I manage to get them washed when she sleeps, it's not all bad.

HollyBerryBush Mon 06-May-13 13:31:22

I know not of what you speak!

Never had a one handed meal. Babies were put down, meals occurred, showers occurred, ablutions occurred, all without an audience.

In my day >dinosaur< it was the strict 4 hour thing and dare I use the phrase "trained like puppies" grin. It's merely a matter of getting a routine and body clocks established.

I don't know anyone of my age who a glued on baby. Seems to be a new phenomenon

LadyBeagleEyes Mon 06-May-13 13:32:19

I always managed to shower and go to the loo alone.
I did eat one handed the first month but I stopped BF and after that it was fine wink

LittleLisa78 Mon 06-May-13 13:32:50

How old are you, Holly?

wonderingsoul Mon 06-May-13 13:33:12

dreamsextreamly was meant to be dreams, extreamly laid back.

Geezer Mon 06-May-13 13:33:25

No it is not true.

These situations are what bouncy chairs, cots and play pens were invented for. I managed to get my children out of infanthood without ever taking one into the loo with me. It really is possible, I promise you. The only difficulty is that you'll get a skewed viewpoint on MN because playpens are regarded by some types of parent as virtual child abuse. grin

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HollyBerryBush Mon 06-May-13 13:35:45

47, eldest is 18

pinkr Mon 06-May-13 13:35:57

Hell i'm 33 and if i'm at my dads and he's having a bath after work I'll sit at the door and natter away...poor man must be desperate for a quiet bath grin

HollyBerryBush Mon 06-May-13 13:36:09

oh yes, agree, bouncy chair thing is your best friend!

LadyBeagleEyes Mon 06-May-13 13:39:11

I wonder if it is an age thing Holly.
My ds is 18 in a couple of months, and I managed all that you did.
I just muddled along though, there weren't any of them new fangled things like parenting websites.

Trill Mon 06-May-13 13:40:37

YABU to think the answer is to adopt a ready-made one - they are just different kids of hassle as they get bigger.

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