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This Isn't My Thread. It's Title Is Too Long.

(186 Posts)
TiggyD Sun 05-May-13 18:58:11

How many fucking books are there? I had to read "That's not my truck" last week. "That's not my truck. It's sides are to ridgey". WTF! £5.99 for 5 pictures of things with fun fur or something on them? They're taking the piss! "That's not my hamster". Seriously! Where's the plot?!

Coming soon:

That's not my poo. It's sides are too glittery.
That's not my poo. It's top is too floaty.
That's my poo. It's tail end is so sweetcorny!

£5.99. angry

Tweasels Sun 05-May-13 20:58:04

That's not my fanny, it's hair is too short.
That's not my fanny, it's opening is too taught.
That's not my fanny, it does not leak wee.

That's my fanny, or it certainly used to be...

grin

WafflyVersatile Sun 05-May-13 21:01:19

''That's not my mummy, she's smiling.
That's not my mummy, she isn't stressed.
That's not my mummy, she's fit and attractive.
That's not my mummy, she's only the person who gave birth to me.
THAT'S my mummy, she's a complete stranger and aged 14.

Sorry, to the teen stranger DS called mummy all the way up the high street.''

grin

My friend is white, her husband black. Her DC went through a phase of calling every black man he saw in the street daddy! grin

cue mortified friend.

KingRollo Sun 05-May-13 21:02:32

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

There are 39 of them. So, who's managed the full series? grin

[Not marking space for more MN rhymes, or anything...]

honeytea Sun 05-May-13 21:10:33

A few of them have won awards, I wonder what the loosing books were like.

Raspberrysorbet Sun 05-May-13 21:11:54

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

catgirl1976 Sun 05-May-13 21:17:10

Loving 'That's not my wine' Raspberry smile

Raspberrysorbet Sun 05-May-13 21:18:35

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NoWayPedro Sun 05-May-13 21:19:55

This isn't my forum, it's all nethuns and kindness
This isn't my forum, it's all boring and mindless
This isn't my forums, no opinions in excess

This is my forum! yoni delights to confess

Ah, That's Not My....

Providing relatives we see once a year with thought-free gift ideas since 2001.

(shovels another 5 into the charity sack)

catgirl1976 Sun 05-May-13 21:25:36

Oh yes please Raspberry grin

catgirl1976 Sun 05-May-13 21:26:21

DS licks the Pandas in 'That's not my Panda'

He doesn't lick any other book.

I have no idea why that is confused

PoppyWearer Sun 05-May-13 21:26:52

That's not my laundry pile. It's folded so neatly.
That's not my laundry pile. It's far too small.
That's not my laundry pile. It's colour-coded.
That's my laundry pile! It's ten storeys tall!

OnTheNingNangNong Sun 05-May-13 21:29:01

grin

PoppyWearer Sun 05-May-13 21:30:16

That's not my schoolchild. Her hair is too tidy.
That's not my schoolchild. Her dress has no stains.
That's not my schoolchild. Her book bag is not bulging.
That's my schoolchild! Her shoes are soooooo scuffed!

FrustratedSycamoresRocks Sun 05-May-13 21:30:43

Ah catgirl at least he doesn't lick the that's not my fanny book that tweasels has. grin

OhHullitsOnlyMeYoni Sun 05-May-13 21:32:25

Oh god yes! And the bloody words seem slightly wrong - a cat with a blue coat (just to confuse yr DC about colours of cats and whether they wear coats), hairy tail - yes it is 'hair' but hairy just seems wrong in this context. Yes, I probably was over-thinking it all by the 9292425th time we read it sad

chandellina Sun 05-May-13 21:32:56

Am I the only maniac that asks my one year old after every page, "where's the mouse? Do you see the mouse? There's mousey! There's the mouse!"

And despair because she has never pointed to it.

catgirl1976 Sun 05-May-13 21:34:44

Hahah grin

I would be a little concerned if he was smile

Perhaps I will steer clear of that particular title until he is a lot older

Seeing Maryz mentioning Peter and Jane upthread makes me long for an MN version.

Here is Jane1968. She reads the thread.

The thread is bad. Jane is sad. She writes too.

AIBU goes batshit. Jane opens wine.

Jane gets totes blattered. Pat the dog licks her face. We love Pat.

MousyMouse Sun 05-May-13 21:52:25

brilliant!

I want all of those.

grin

TiggyD Sun 05-May-13 22:01:23

I do not like those stupid books
I will not even take a look
I will not feel the fuzzy bit
Those expensive things are total shit

PoppyWearer Sun 05-May-13 22:06:42

That's not my mother-in-law. Her mouth is too smiley.
That's not my mother-in-law. Her hug is too warm.
That's not my mother-in-law. Her advice is so welcome.
That's my mother-in-law! She's sooooooo passive-aggressive!

Ok, I'll stop now.

TiggyD - could you not pen one along the lines of That's not my poo flume?

It would be nice to introduce a whole new generation of children to the concept

RedRidingChops Sun 05-May-13 22:14:04

That's not my handbag. It has clean tissues in it.
That's not my handbag. It isn't full of used nappies and snot.
That's not my handbag. The bottom isn't sticky.

That's my handbag! That old sandwich is Soooooo fluffy.

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