to want to kidnap these kids from the park?

(109 Posts)
Amykins35 Thu 02-May-13 22:57:04

We went to the park after school today and there was a mum with her friend and their children. She had a child of around 3 strapped into a Pushchair facing away from her and into a bush. He was screaming and crying and absolutely distraught and she was chatting and laughing with her friend like they couldn't even hear him. After we'd been there 10 mins or so he gave up and went to sleep. One of the other mums commented that he'd been crying like that for an hour beforehand. He woke again after a short while and was crying and thrashing about so much he tipped his pushchair over. His mum smacked him, shouted at him for knocking her shopping over and then Parked him further away before resuming her chat.
DD was trying to go on the slide but a baby of 14 months or so was crawling on it. His mum was sitting w

Maybe he was having a melt down and it was safer in the buggy than hurling himself down I front if people or in the way at the park? Best thing to do with tantrums is ignore which explains the chatting. The smacking sounds nasty but we don't know the full story.

Cloverer Thu 02-May-13 23:04:26

Some parents are shit. Yes, we don't know the full story but ignoring for an hour, shouting and hitting is still shit whatever.

TheChaoGoesMu Thu 02-May-13 23:07:32

Maybe he was tired and having a tantrum, which is why she might have turned him to face the bushes, less visual stimulation. She shouldn't have smacked him though.

My dd has had many a tantrum in the buggy. If I was to get her out she would thrash about and kick her legs and hit her head on mine. Put her down and she would hit the floor. Do I like her screaming in the buggy? No, but its a darn site safer than having her thrashing about in my arms.

I'd never snack I don't agree with it at all but kids throw tantrums sometimes big ones and talking to them or trying to distract them can feed the tantrum and make it worse. Ignoring is sometimes the only way to go.

thebody Thu 02-May-13 23:14:43

Difficult to judge without knowing the full picture really.

Amykins35 Thu 02-May-13 23:14:57

Would you really sit there chatting for over an hour while she was so upset though caffeine?

jacks365 Thu 02-May-13 23:16:44

My dd throws spectacular tantrums including throwing herself backwards onto the floor so the pushchair prevents her hurting herself however no child would cry for that length of time fall asleep and then continue the tantrums when they awoke. My dd can't keep a tantrum up for more than 2 mins. This sounds like a clear case of abuse then add in the unreasonable smacking. YANBU but that parent was.

LemonsLimes Thu 02-May-13 23:19:29

Poor kid. sad

Amykins35 Thu 02-May-13 23:21:23

Posted too soon. His mum was sitting nearby with friends but not really watching. After several minutes of DD waiting patiently his mum distracted him with a bottle of chocolate milkshake...which he then took back to slide, tipped it all over slide, slipped in it and banged his head very hard - then got told off for spilling his milkshake before his mum continued her conversation about how she could save money on suncream because he tans rather than Burns...!
AIBU to just despair and want to give these kids a huge cuddle? Situations like these just make me wonder what the child's home life is like if they're treated like this in public

Well to be honest I leg it home. Too many people out there thinking the worst over a child's paddy. Dd1 could have easily tantrums for an hour at three. Dd2 can be pretty bad if she's tired. There have been a couple of occasions where it's gone on that long but given I was at a bus stop by a main road getting her out was not an option. I'd rather a screaming child than one who hurt themselves trying to run off.

Amykins35 Thu 02-May-13 23:29:40

So there wasn't a bus in an entire hour? Sorry, not getting at you personally I just hate the thought of a child being upset for so long and it not being prevented/solved

Cloverer Thu 02-May-13 23:32:51

Screaming to the point of exhaustion, falling asleep, then waking up still distressed does not sound like a tantrum that needed to be ignored to me. Shouting and smacking also doesn't add up to a good parent managing their child's behaviour.

No there wasn't. It didn't show up. And the second one was late. I couldn't get home til it arrived. I'm sure if anyone saw they would be horrified but there was literally nothing I could do. Is been through my bag of tricks then some. Is she neglected ? No she's a happy healthy much loved child. And the thought that someone would wanna kidnap her over a tantrum that's a result of circumstances out of my control is upsetting.

Maybe she is a neglect ful mother or maybe the kid does it all the time and she's used to it and knows he will snap out if it, who knows. I don't agree with smacking as I said but on its own a tantrum is not really something that would concern me. I'd just be grateful that that day it wast my child.

DevonCiderPunk Thu 02-May-13 23:39:57

Amykins what support did you offer to this family?

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 02-May-13 23:43:44

This was all ho-hum explicable until the smack. No excuse for a smack so there's not much point arguing the toss about the rest of it.

IMO

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 02-May-13 23:46:07

And would you really stay in the same place, outside, with a tantrumming child, Wheresmy?

I also had a championship tantrummer, but for my own and everyone els's sanity I would relaocate myself

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Thu 02-May-13 23:46:37

hmm

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 02-May-13 23:47:09

relocate

TiggerWearsATriteSmile Thu 02-May-13 23:50:24

It's not even a funny attempt, sorry.

Cutesy name with added numbers, you get points for that. Just about.

JamieandtheMagicTorch Thu 02-May-13 23:51:03

Oh Ok

Are we reporting then?

Amykins35 Thu 02-May-13 23:51:31

Devon - I was looking after 3 small. Children, a baby and 2 dogs so none. I don't think me going over and offering support would've been taken too well anyway - she'd probably have smacked me too!

Amykins35 Thu 02-May-13 23:53:12

Funny? Why would it be funny?

NeoMaxiZoomDweebie Thu 02-May-13 23:53:33

You certainly kept your ears and your eyes open given that you had charge of 3 kids and 2 dogs yourself Amykins...didn't miss one word did you?

Again.

hmm

It was a bus stop! The bus coulda turned up any minute. If I'd have left I'd have missed it. Where exactly could I have gone. I wouldn't have sat in a park for an hour god no but I was actually trying to get home.

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