To be pissed off PIL looked after baby while I was at work and left me with upset, screaming child

(215 Posts)
Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:16:57

At work this mornin so was dh but he was with dc most of time. Apparently he thought pil did fab jobplayin with dc and really stimulating him. I came home to a screaming tired underfed baby who needed a full outfit change. This was one of the first times they had dc and I had left instructions which they did seem to attempt to follow. Dh can't seem to understand why I think they are useless AIBU???

morethanpotatoprints Sat 27-Apr-13 22:33:57

Mamacj.

Hey welcome to the real world, you have your mum and pil to provide childcare for you and you are moaning. You sound the most entitled person I have ever heard of.
Yes, you do have to get up with small children during the night.

Do you ever spend or want to spend time with your dc? Why did you have kids? I think I will hide your thread because you are making my blood pressure rise angry

gorionine Sat 27-Apr-13 22:36:03

yabu

ThePskettiIncident Sat 27-Apr-13 22:37:08

So have it out with your should instead of bemoaning his parents who did you a favour. If your dh is a lazy twunt, he needs to pitch in.

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:37:18

Charming morethanpotatoprints I spend a lot of time with dc but do work to try to give him a good life

ThePskettiIncident Sat 27-Apr-13 22:37:42

Should = DH! Apologies

ShadowStorm Sat 27-Apr-13 22:38:04

Not sure really - if it's been years since they looked after a small child, it may just be that they're a bit rusty?

Pollydon Sat 27-Apr-13 22:38:09

No Agent, just screaming, tired and underfed sad.
Mamacj, I think you would need to have a little chat with them, no blame, just go over the basics

Pollydon Sat 27-Apr-13 22:38:33

No Agent, just screaming, tired and underfed sad.
Mamacj, I think you would need to have a little chat with them, no blame, just go over the basics

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:38:47

You see I don't think of it as a favour as I wanted my mum to do it

MrsBombastic Sat 27-Apr-13 22:40:03

1) They did you a favour, if you don't like it then yes, pay for childcare.
2) If your hubby is a lazy slob, kick him into touch or kick him out.
3) I think you just don't like PIL babysitting and is making a big deal out of nothing.
4) In terms of "leaving you with all the crap", yes, that's what grandparents do.
5) Why don't you tell THEM that and see what they say?
6) YADBU

squeakytoy Sat 27-Apr-13 22:40:23

If your husband was there most of the time, why did he not change his childs nappy?

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:40:43

ShadowStorm and Pollydon I think they are a bit clueless and will need to go through things with them

Cravingdairy Sat 27-Apr-13 22:40:47

I'm sure they did their best, looking after someone else's baby is hard and while your DH was there he was the responsible one.

IncrediblePhatTheInnkeepersCat Sat 27-Apr-13 22:40:48

YABU I'm afraid. If my Mum looks after 8 month DS, he normally comes back tired, hungry and cranky. It's got nothing to do with her ability to look after him, just the change in person, routine and environment.

Also, sometimes babies can just have cranky days. I've recently gone back to work and DH stays home. Occasionally I've come home to a blotchy bawling baby, who has been crying for 3 hours despite DH's best efforts, which doesn't make him a shit dad. It's all down to trust. It doesn't sound as if you trust your PIL very much, but hopefully the next time will go much better and reassure you.

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:41:53

My dh doesn't do nappy changing- I thought most were the same!

usualsuspect Sat 27-Apr-13 22:42:35

Are you on some sort of wind up?

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:43:11

Thank you that's been the most helpful reply!

Pollydon Sat 27-Apr-13 22:43:19

Fucking hell morethanpotatoes, get a grip, the op works, you know, to earn money for her family !

Alibabaandthe40nappies Sat 27-Apr-13 22:43:52

Oh dear.

sweetestcup Sat 27-Apr-13 22:44:25

You see I don't think of it as a favour as I wanted my mum to do it

Probably just another example of the woman's parents being seen as more important the Dads I think. And you probably dont like your PILs very much.

Alibabaandthe40nappies Sat 27-Apr-13 22:44:37

That 'oh dear' was to you OP.

Of course men change nappies. Ones who don't are lazy, and think they are more important than you are.

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:45:36

True sweetestcup

sweetestcup Sat 27-Apr-13 22:45:49

My dh doesn't do nappy changing- I thought most were the same!

Are you for real? Speak for yourself if youve been landed with a useless hands off Dad.

Cravingdairy Sat 27-Apr-13 22:46:15

" My dh doesn't do nappy changing- I thought most were the same!"

Really, really not.

Mamacj Sat 27-Apr-13 22:46:52

Yes seriously he refuses

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