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To not want to spend £30+ on wedding? How much did you spend and where?

(232 Posts)
orangeclock Fri 26-Apr-13 16:56:26

My partner and I have 2 children and are approaching 10 years together. We haven't married yet because we just haven't got around to it. We feel married already but think it would be wise to make things legal. We'd like to get married next year with about 150-200 guests, and we want to do something fairly lovely in a beautiful venue with a sit down meal.

Can I ask where you got married, how many guests, and how much did you spend?

I have looked at a couple of lovely venues but they cost out at £30,000 plus with the catering! We just don't want to spend such a huge chunk of money.

£20,000 would probably be our limit and I still think that's a small fortune.

We can't escape the sit down meal - older family would expect it. I also would like a really lovely venue and a good photographer.

We're happy to skimp on cake, cars, honeymoon, simple decorations, getting married off season and maybe mid week. Also starting later in the day so it's not an all day celebration.

I would really appreciate hearing your wedding experiences and any tips for not spending an absolute fortune! Thank you.

Floggingmolly Wed 08-May-13 13:37:51

Do you really, Mabroon? I'd imagine op's assumption that 200+ people would be delighted to spend the day watching her get married might be slightly more delusional, actually.
Nobody has 200 close friends. Of those, she'd be lucky if around 15/20 of them genuinely give a toss she's getting married.
To the others, it will be a nice day out if it doesn't interfere with anything else they've got planned.

Snugglepiggy Wed 08-May-13 14:07:37

I'm with you Northern and Floggingmolly and agree OPs response was not nice.But each to their own.
I personally don't see why after I0years and two DCs anyone would want to do the whole traditional big venue and wedding thing?A celebration yes.A party after a small intimate ceremony.I understand that.My DB got married after 20 plus years and three DCs and it was lovely to have a big family meal and celebrate.But tbh if he had expected us to travel to a far off venue ,pay for hotels and big wedding do type outfits - which lets face it most of your guests will probably have to do - I would have been bemused, if not annoyed.
My niece has just got married after 2 years living together and a baby and it cost about £20k and they are saving for a bigger house.I thought that was slightly bonkers tbh but maybe I am a party pooper.

violetbean Wed 08-May-13 14:23:56

We spent around £15k on our wedding last year on a Saturday in central London - around 190 guests. Managed (through extensive search) to find a hotel with a lovely function room where 3-course meal, inc room hire, was £28 a head. Spent rest mainly on photography, drinks, presents for people who helped out and church service.

Saved money by buying cheaper dress, cheapest wedding car we could find, cheap (but good) local DJ, M&S cake, local florist just for bouquets and church volunteers for decorative flowers in church. Was lucky too because bridesmaids chose a BHS dress that I got at a discount from a voucher in a wedding magazine.

It can be done, just depends on your priorities, constraints and how much time you have to organise things.

Happy to PM our contacts / suppliers if that would help - just PM me.

ImTooHecsyForYourParty Wed 08-May-13 14:37:07

It was 15 years ago. If we spent £500 I'd be surprised.

I didn't want a wedding though. I just wanted to be married. If it had been entirely up to me, I'd have gone with him, signed the contract and gone home grin, but we compromised with a very small marking of the occasion. Mainly because people would have thought it odd if we hadn't.

I couldn't WAIT for it to be over! We only had family members and a couple of friends there and it was still hell. All those people looking at me.

cost wise, the outfits maybe a hundred or two - he wore a grey suit, yellow tie and white shirt and I wore a blue chinese style silky outfit. ran a brush through my hair and shoved on some make up
the registry office - I think it was £50. £20 deposit is all I remember because my husband said to the registrar "It's amazing how much you can get for £20 these days" grin
no cars or flowers or any of that stuff, we just went together in his car, taking as many with us as would fit in.
we all walked to the pub afterwards and had lunch, I think everyone paid for themselves.
then we all went our separate ways and met up in our local in the evening. The landlords were mates of mine and gave us the place for free.
everyone paid for their own drinks
I'd arranged with the local catering college for them to do a buffet - catering students are always (or at least they were back then) VERY eager to get a chance to practice and I think it cost us £60 or £70 or something like that.

job done. married 15 years and counting. (don't know why I'm counting, there's no parole to look forward to wink )

sparechange Wed 08-May-13 14:51:16

I looked at, but didn't book, this place, which does all-in packages including a free bar, wine with the meal etc. And it has a pretty impressive venue for photos etc
the.hac.org.uk/weddings-private-events/wedding-packages/

There are other places like that which will do an all-in package, so you know up front what you are spending.

handcream Wed 08-May-13 14:54:30

Blimey, £30k on a wedding that you havent got around to for 10 years and 2 children later. I wouldnt let the older generation dicate to you what they want tbh.

We got married over 15 years ago when the new rules regarding places to get married had just come in so there were only a handful and all very posh - Cliveden anyone.... We didnt chose Cliveden but we did chose something similar and very posh!

Here's how we did it for £3k

1. Late afternoon wedding. No cars, bridesmaids, ushers, and all of that marklarky

2. Champagne on the lawn then into dinner and all guests gone by midnight

3. Dress was by a single dress designer who gave me the dress at half price as it was my size and she couldnt get the fabric anymore. I know there are a number of companies who will buy your old wedding dress providing it is in excellent condition so that might be worth a look.

4. We only had 24 people (I dont know 200 people!) and NO children.

So, if you have the money lying around then of course do it but if you have not bothered for 10 years then perhaps there are other things to do with it.

Syon Park may be an option if you are in London
www.syonpark.co.uk/weddings.asp

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