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Am I going mad or is DP being unreasonable?

(56 Posts)
Discolite Thu 18-Apr-13 10:58:39

Monday - drove off after having put my handbag on the roof of the car. He told me the handbag was on the roof whilst I was putting the baby in the carseat, funnily enough my attention was elsewhere and I didn't hear him. Loss of handbag, 2x carkeys, bank cards, driving license (with address on obv), housekeys. Vague apology made for totally ruining my day with stress and worry. Yes, a mistake but things like this happen all the time due to his carelessness and lack of common sense.

Yesterday - I placed an order with an online company to the tune of £250. It is in his name as I don't have a bank card. However, I discovered half way through the transaction that you can pay by paypal so the money that paid for the items is mine. Today they ring up whilst I was in bed after a bad night with the baby. DP takes the call. The order needs to be changed, he says "That's fine" even though he knew it took me weeks of researching to decide on these items and doesn't get me, or say I'll ring them back. He is now angry with me for being angry with him. Apparently if he'd woken me up I would've been unreasonable so he didn't. Doesn't take the point that he could have got me to ring them back.

Final straw today - I find he's washed the cat's blanket (pretty minging actually, excuse is a 5 week old baby) with baby clothes on a 15 minute 30 degree wash. Now the clothes are covered in cat hair and in my opinion, diritier than when they went in. When I point this out, he is angry with me as all I do is criticise him....ARGH.

So, AIBU in being pretty fed up at the moment?

Pagwatch Thu 18-Apr-13 15:42:26

Yes. Exactly THERhubarb !

Rockinhippy Thu 18-Apr-13 15:44:00

There's another like my DHshock

I can't add anything to the very good advice starfield has already given - it will all seem far more bearable when you are less exhausted, those early months are extremely hard on both of you, but will be much easier if you can reset & work together more.

FTR mine is the same, over 13yr later a lot better than he was - but still on another planet half of the time, but you know what, he has so many good qualities that make up for that, that I wouldn't swap him for the world wink

Pagwatch Thu 18-Apr-13 15:44:46

My DH is a fucking awesome father who couldn't have told you what breast pads I needed if his life had depended on it.

mmmerangue Thu 18-Apr-13 15:56:27

Oops, seem to have started a fight with the words 'man things'.

but I mean the same as 'on another planet...'

Men are from mars women are from venus etc..

Man carry their lives in their pockets, so if one inadvertently forgets to double check a handbag, it's not like he is used to having to remember one.

My DP can work the washing machine but he will wash his dirty workwear with other practically clean black stuff, which then gives it a funny smell...

He also never properly washes cutlery, which gets on my tits, but he gets annoyed that I don't know how the car works (as long as it does I don't care!) so, y'know, it all evens out.

Wibblypiglikesbananas Thu 18-Apr-13 15:58:20

Each to their own I guess!

It's not a man thing. Dh would not have done any of that, plus he can wash up cutlery and his shirts. I however struggle with all of those things! Hope things are looking brighter op...

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