To ask if you pay money for good school reports?

(136 Posts)
whokilleddannylatimer Mon 15-Apr-13 13:27:35

Because three other parents have all expressed shock and that IABU that I do not, the children are in primary school, I have never even thought about it to be honest, I just told and expected the dc to try their hardest and praised them when they have.

Its never crossed my mind to pay them for it!

seeker Mon 15-Apr-13 13:49:50

"Seeker that's irrelevant. They need to know they're lucky to have a good education and to be helped to learn the pleasure in knowledge."

Of course- has anyone said any different?

wigglesrock Mon 15-Apr-13 13:50:59

Yup, on occasion we hit up McDonalds or get something new, and my kids are only in primary school smile. My mum usually buys them some new books, colouring stuff. I work for money, I expect my children are the same. They love school, doesn't mean they haven't earned a treat.

LittleMissBunnyoni Mon 15-Apr-13 13:57:37

I reward mine with a new toy and a we go to the cafe for a treat. They are only in reception and year 2 but they both got good marks for their attitude too, and did well for things like manners etc.

My son who is in year 2 has been struggling in school with his concentration so I was very pleased he had tried so hard as they both know that so long as they try their best I am happy.

I don't see a problem with a reward for something if that's what people choose to do. I hadn't said they would get a reward before hand so they didn't do it just for the reward.

dayshiftdoris Mon 15-Apr-13 20:53:17

Complete sidetrack but I read the OP as you paying the teacher for a good report...

Perhaps says more about the school reports I have received...

Carry on grin

ihearsounds Mon 15-Apr-13 21:02:34

The occasional treat and positive reinforcement and loads of praise, even looking at the positives in the not so good grades. The treats have remained random, and unknown until given.

LiegeAndLief Mon 15-Apr-13 21:05:16

I also thought you meant paying the teacher to produce a good report for your child. Was horrified that most of your friends thought this was normal until the penny dropped...

No. Although have only got to Y2 so far. I think my parents were the only ones in the whole entire world (certainly felt like it) who didn't pay out for good GCSE/A-level results but they knew I would put the effort in regardless. Bastards.

Hulababy Mon 15-Apr-13 21:07:01

No never.

Meglet Mon 15-Apr-13 21:10:52

Yes. Just a £1. His Grandma gets him something too.

Cherriesarelovely Mon 15-Apr-13 21:45:15

A little treat such as trip to a cafe for tea and cake. I wouldn't actually pay her though.

everlong Mon 15-Apr-13 21:47:48

So a bit of a treat is wrong for them trying hard and doing well?

Why??

flaminghoopsaloohlah Mon 15-Apr-13 21:49:02

For a minute there I thought you mean paying the teachers for a good school report... (though the school DC are in does seem to have a high proportion of high fliers who have parents who donate directly to the school's church...)

Part of DC pocket money is awarded each week for them making it through the week at school with no verbal warnings etc...but paying your child for a good school report...I've not considered it. It's kind of like RL performance related pay I suppose...

deleted203 Mon 15-Apr-13 21:53:41

Knackered minds think alike! I read the title (after a loooooong first day back at school) and thought, 'Fucking Hell...some nutter thinks they can offer to pay me to write their DC a good school report' grin.

Cherriesarelovely Mon 15-Apr-13 21:54:12

I really enjoy pretty much any opportunity to celebrate something lovely and positive.

Bunbaker Mon 15-Apr-13 22:09:06

No, never. DD is quiet and fairly bright, so her reports are always positive. I didn't even buy her anything for doing well in her SATS. Some parents bought their kids an iPod touch, which IMO is a bit OTT.

My Dh started doing this when the boys were about 12.
If all the grades at the end of each term were above a set amount (B's I think) he gave them some money something like £5 then if they managed to do that through the whole school year they got something that they wanted, could be a day out or dinner out or and item, not overly expensive. One year Ds 1 wanted a family dinner out and one time he wanted a small camera, one year Ds 2 got a trampoline, and another year a kitten.
He kept this up all the way through high school and there were years where they got end of term £5 and no summer gift due to missing goals for one term and others where they did brilliant. It was all done in a matter of fact way, no punishments of telling offs for any grades.
Both finished High school with really good scores. So it worked

steppemum Mon 15-Apr-13 22:13:40

For us, the most important thing is that they are trying their best and that their behaviour is good. ds has been a bit wobbly on both effort and behaviour at times.

So, if I rewarded, I would sometimes be rewarding one child and not the other, which I am not comfortable with.

We did, at the end of last summer, all go to MacDonalds, (rare treat) because they had both come home with good reports. But I do not make it a regular/promised thing

thebody Mon 15-Apr-13 22:14:47

Think cherriesarelovely put it very well.

Why not have a small gift or a meal out. Lovely family celebration of positive achievement.

pointythings Mon 15-Apr-13 22:19:25

We go out for a nice meal and the DDs get a mahoosive dessert of their choice. That's it. I'm not sure I'll even offer financial rewards for GCSEs, I didn't get any.

steppemum Mon 15-Apr-13 22:46:24

interesting squinkies, I wonder if their grades would have been any different if they hadn't been rewarded?

I don't think their grades would have been any different if they hadn't been paid, they were happy students, liked school and friends and weren't greedy about what gift they wanted.
Rewarding one without the other didn't seem to faze them. No big productions were made about gifts. It helped that they have a big age gap so there was a few years where the older one got the money alone, and the younger one was told once you are 12 you can do this, or have that and he seemed happy about waiting.

ratbagcatbag Tue 16-Apr-13 05:41:28

Hmmm we've just gone through an incentive bribery chat with DSS. He's in year 10 and had an awful report, he's coasting, not interested, dropping into d grades for everything. He's had a huge rollicking and a fairly boring Easter break. But we've now along with his mum done a chart with various amounts for each grade. Depends on subject depends on amount too. If he gets top in everything it will earn him enough to buy a decent car and insure it outright at 17. If this doesnt work, we give up.

ratbagcatbag Tue 16-Apr-13 05:42:54

Should clarify, grades achieved at gcse, not just assessments through the year.

seeker Tue 16-Apr-13 06:09:13

Bloody hell- a car!

I thought I was being generous by buying dd's Isle of Wight festival ticket and tell inner she had to give me 10 quid back for every A she didn't get!

nooka Tue 16-Apr-13 06:34:31

We do something nice (go out for a treat usually) if the children get good reports, but it's always been a bit of a problem in the past as dd always gets good reports, and ds very rarely does. dd loves school, loves to please her teachers, finds concentrating easy and is very bright. She is also a bit of a perfectionist and drives herself too hard. ds is also very bright, but dyslexic, poorly organised (a dyslexic trait), internally motivated (works hard at things that interest him and not at those that don't) and unmotivated by either punishment or reward.

So if we paid them for performance dd would be even more stressed and ds wouldn't care. We've had the conversation about other children getting paid and neither child thought it would incentivise them. On the other hand they both understand that good grades are important for them to be able to fulfill their dreams - I think it's more important to work for real long term goals, although I can totally understand bribing an uncooperative teenager through the last year or two of school if I thought it would work.

Mrsrobertduvall Tue 16-Apr-13 06:42:20

Mine always have excellent reports with top marks for effort, though ds gets higher grades as dd struggles with maths and English.
At secondary school they have always been rewarded for that with £20.

However should dd manage a c in maths gcse this summer she will have a supermarket sweep type trip to Top Shop grin

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