To wonder why this Mother was eye rolling over my comments to my DC.

(129 Posts)
Goldenbear Fri 12-Apr-13 14:17:26

I was at a supermarket this morning and was trying to choose some yogurts for my DC. DS picks up some that are laden with sugar. So I said, 'no not those they have too much sugar in them, what about these instead?'. Cue lots of eye rolling from a new Mother nearby. She picked up something more sugary for herself so I don't think she was in agreement with me. I'd seen her from the start pushing her newborn baby in a supermarket car seat style trolley, the baby was wailing and wailing and couldn't have been older than 2 weeks. When i first saw the newborn crying and crying i felt sorry for the baby but then remembered how difficult those first weeks were and so stopped judging. However, after the yoghurt judgment I did feel that she was hardly in a position to judge my 'preciousness', considering her very young baby was wailing the whole way around the shop and she wouldn't pick it up. I heard her say things to the 2 week old intermittently like, 'you're not having a good day today are you?'

I knew she was a new Mum because there was a nappy promotion on in the store and I heard her tell the shop assistant that the baby girl was her first.

AIBU in thinking you keep the eye rolling to yourself given the circumstances?

PickledInAPearTree Fri 12-Apr-13 15:09:55

Some babies cry all the time what you supposed to do starve?

This is another reminder of why I Internet shop.

You run the fricking gauntlet at tescos these days what with eye rolling and people threatening to knock you out.

edwardsmum11 Fri 12-Apr-13 15:12:30

Tbh I think I did really odd things too when I was a new mother.... probably rolled my eyes at people andvsang and said odd things,... you are being too sensitive.

YoniLovesChachi Fri 12-Apr-13 15:15:28

Loud parenting is embarrassing for everyone. Whether it's a child being praised too loudly in order to catch an audience's attention, or a loud proclamation of holier-than-thouness in the yogurt aisle or a child getting a massive shouting at for misbehaving. Just keep the volume down.

Love the rice cakes for the treat jar grin

VeryObviousBeforeNameChange Fri 12-Apr-13 15:18:24

I honestly think that some people have FAR to much time on their hands. I think OP, that you need a hobby. Or a life.

Beatrixpotty Fri 12-Apr-13 15:19:34

She was probably eye rolling because her baby was crying thinking you'd understand because you're a mum too

HairyGrotter Fri 12-Apr-13 15:20:59

Literally, who gives a fuck? People eye roll, so what?!

Goldenbear Fri 12-Apr-13 15:23:51

I'm a 4 hour drive away from home as I'm visiting my Mum and I'm wondering whether I am coming across as a 'loud parent' as I've noticed a slight difference in parenting style around here.

I only noticed her a lot as the supermarket was pretty empty. I definitely was not staring at her. When I was looking at the yoghurts she appeared not the other way around.

soverylucky Fri 12-Apr-13 15:23:53

Surely I am not alone in not giving a toss about what others do and do not put in their trolley? Seriously - she eye rolled you? Someone could walk past me in a diving suit in tesco and I wouldn't notice because I am just doing my own thing and minding my own business.

I can't believe that this bothered you so much that you took the time to write about in on AIBU. Just forget about it.

singstothebluewolf Fri 12-Apr-13 15:23:53

Maybe she thought because you were looking at her so much that your comments were directed toward her for having sugary food in her trolley. Or perhaps her eye roll had nothing to do with you. It could have been from exhaustion, she may have forgotten something and now had to walk back to another aisle or frustration at the baby's constant screams.

yabu.

YouTheCat Fri 12-Apr-13 15:25:24

My eyes roll so much I look like a one armed bandit, grin

OP leave the poor new mum alone and let your boy have some yoghurts.

Goldenbear Fri 12-Apr-13 15:30:56

Usual,I wasn't stalking her, I was trying to get away from her. It felt like the other way around.

I'm massively sleep deprived, DD has just turned 2 and has been up most of the week ill and DS has erratic sleep- walks and talks, night sweats etc. has done for almost 6 years. I UNDERSTAND sleep deprivation.

Bearcrumble Fri 12-Apr-13 15:41:45

So she was chasing you?

Please expand on 'slight difference in parenting style' too.

Bearcrumble Fri 12-Apr-13 15:44:54

Because I am, perhaps uncharitably, reading it as code for 'right bunch of povvos'.

5318008 Fri 12-Apr-13 15:45:57

look OP you are a wonderful mum and the other one is just dreadful, that poor POOR baby, and as for the parents in the locality you are currently staying in - well they are just AWFUL

Is what OP wants to hear

<sniggers unkindly>

Pandemoniaa Fri 12-Apr-13 15:51:58

I'm always amazed at this sort of "eye-rolling encounter. I'm disinterested enough in the shopping I'm buying. The idea of being bothered about what anyone else may or may not be judging me about leaves me baffled.

Although if you were doing the sort of loud "No, Lysander we only eat organic, locally sourced brussel tops" sort of parenting, that you get occasionally in the local Waitrose, it might stir me out of my disinterested torpor long enough to raise a snigger.

edwardsmum11 Fri 12-Apr-13 15:53:28

I really wonder wh you are so obsessed by this poor new mum tbh.

woozlebear Fri 12-Apr-13 15:56:41

Crikey, I don't think I've ever paid any attention to what anyone else is buying unless they fill the entire till conveyor belt with something blindingly odd.

Crinkle77 Fri 12-Apr-13 15:58:20

Maybe she was eye rolling cos you were in her way? Perhaps she couldn't get to the yoghurts she really wanted.

notso Fri 12-Apr-13 15:59:31

Why do care? You obviously didn't rate her parenting skills so why give a toss that she didn't rate yours.

squeakytoy Fri 12-Apr-13 16:00:51

I rolled my eyes just reading the OP...

Goldenbear Fri 12-Apr-13 16:02:40

She wasn't chasing me, of course not, I was responding to the comments about me stalking her. She was just heading the same way as me around the supermarket. She came in to the shop after me. I was stopped by the shop assistant with the nappy promotion half way around the shop as was she. I must admit I didn't want to be near the newborn crying and wailing but that doesn't mean initially I didn't feel for the Mum- I really did.

I thought it was a bit rude to eye roll pointedly at my remarks, I wouldn't do this where I live as I don't think people would take too kindly to it.

People seem to be more hot on manners around here, nothing to do with wealth. They seem more concerned with self restraint - even in a play park setting. I'm not saying either is better or worse but I expect to be able to talk to my DC in a non loud voice without judgement.

KatyDid02 Fri 12-Apr-13 16:07:11

If she's a first time Mum then she is going to do it all perfectly and never buy sugar laden yoghurts so was probably horrified.

I remember being a new Mum and judging somebody who didn't take her baby to the GP at the first hint of a temperature, she explained that she gave calpol and then waited to see how her baby got on. A few months later a first time mum asked me what to do if the baby had a bit of a temperature, I said give calpol and wait and see, she was mortified that I wasn't rushing my baby to the GP grin

YABU but neither was she really, the first weeks are so hard and she was probably exhausted.

FredFredGeorge Fri 12-Apr-13 16:08:26

I think you'd better encourage your Mum to move to your part of the country, or have her visit you, it's clear your parenting style just doesn't fit in there. Best avoid.

KatyDid02 Fri 12-Apr-13 16:08:28

Sorry I meant YANBU but slightly odd...

Where are you and where are you from? If its 4 hours apart I'm sure you can give a vague description of both without outing yourself.

Also why do I never have such rice cake humour in Waitrose? I think its because mine is in a TOWIE stronghold.

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