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to be upset that virtually the whole of MN are mocking my husband?

(550 Posts)
BriansWife Thu 11-Apr-13 20:34:06

Last night my husband, Brian, made the very brave decision to offer yoni massage via MN. We have both been terribly upset at the response he received, especially the references to him being perverted. I would like to explain that my husband is a professional, and it is only now after studying the Tantra for 17 years, he feels qualified to offer this service. Many could never reach this level of expertise.
I indeed have been lucky to receive many yoni massages from Brian and cannot rate them highly enough. When my friend, Becky, had a traumatic birth I suggested Brian give her a yoni massage. Not only did she find it a very spiritual and pleasurable experience, she has been able to stop dwelling on the birth and is no longer feeling any pain in her yoni. Becky's happy ending has given Brian the confidence to offer his services further afield.
Please be assured that Brian is a very caring man whose only concern is the health and happiness of yoni's, NOT his own pleasure. He posted on MN as he is aware many women experience trauma to their yoni's during childbirth.

EverythingsJustBeachy Thu 11-Apr-13 20:43:00

brianswife were you on MN before Brian posted? Because you'd have known what MN is like, and for all we know you are not Brian's wife, but a lovely fellow MN aware that the original thread is running out of room!

Flojobunny Thu 11-Apr-13 20:43:45

Brilliant, Brian has made a difficult time a tiny bit better.
Think nurses on ward are wondering what I keep laughing at!

MadCap Thu 11-Apr-13 20:43:58

Lueiji, it was first earlier today grin

YoniLovesChachi Thu 11-Apr-13 20:44:15

I didn't know Brian dealt with injured yonis. Your house must be like St Tiggywinkles, but with beavers women instead of hedgehogs. He's a pillar of the community, your Bri.

almapudden Thu 11-Apr-13 20:44:28

Does he do discounts if we make a group booking?

HeyYoniYoni Thu 11-Apr-13 20:44:42

I think it only right and proper that MN offer to do a product test

BloominMarvellous Thu 11-Apr-13 20:44:47

I have to name change now!! I want to remember this forever!!!!

GinandYonic Thu 11-Apr-13 20:44:56

It's not just a wank it's a 17 years in the making Professional wank grin

Altinkum Thu 11-Apr-13 20:44:59

hmm

MadCap Thu 11-Apr-13 20:45:28

It's an M&S wank

BriansWife Thu 11-Apr-13 20:46:21

Unfortunately, Becky isn't on MN or she would have been able to back me up.

PhyllisDoris, it would be selfish of me to mind, akin to a vicar's wife being upset he was putting his insights into a sermon instead of sharing them with her alone.

MyBloominMarvellousYoni Thu 11-Apr-13 20:47:03

ignores op

<Twirls>

Flossiechops Thu 11-Apr-13 20:47:40

Just read the op in classics!!! Fab!! gringringringrin

MyBloominMarvellousYoni Thu 11-Apr-13 20:47:45

I so read semen not sermon!!!!!!

crazydrunkevilyoni Thu 11-Apr-13 20:48:01

M&S Wank grin

dopeysheep Thu 11-Apr-13 20:48:11

I can't help but rename every famous Tony as Yoni.
Yoni Blair.
Yoni Soprano.

nkf Thu 11-Apr-13 20:48:19

We need Becky.

littlestressy Thu 11-Apr-13 20:48:25

My yoni is very selective, I might have to decline

BattlingYonis Thu 11-Apr-13 20:48:31

Wooo we all love a good name change :D Its been a while!

Two things;
1. 'brave decision to offer yoni massage via MN'

Brave as in how?

and

2. Brian/Brian's wife. Someone please tell me we're not talking Prof. Cox & missus. That'd give a whole new interpretation of 'stimulated emission'.

"....like St Tiggywinkles but with beavers women I stead of hedgehogs....."!!! I am crying with laughter, and the dog is Looking at me like this > confused

YoniLovesChachi Thu 11-Apr-13 20:49:25

Brian is the High Priest of Handjobs. He puts a little of himself into every member of his flock. What a man.

muddythegoddessofdawn Thu 11-Apr-13 20:49:33

Hi
Can you tell me if Brian is self employed or does he work a week in hand! grin

I'm glad Beckys yoni is feeling better.

Forwardscatter Thu 11-Apr-13 20:49:40

Has he tried Netmums?

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr instead, not I stead - bloody iPad.

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