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AIBU?

Dh makes enormous faux pas

84 replies

Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 20:49

Earlier, my dh decided to get some red wine. He was busy on the computer when older dc asked him to get our dd a bottle of squash.
I went upstairs to find it on the floor.. It looked very dark for squash so I went to dilute it as I only allow very weak squash. I then realised it was the bloody wine.
I ran downstairs to tell him. He didn't believe me until I made him smell it. How could anyone be so stupid?
He has recently been signed of work with depression and is finding it hard to concentrate and think straight but i am really disturbed by this and what might have happened if she had drank any.
I don't know what to do really.
I'm crying :(

OP posts:
Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:22

Why is this not showing up when i search for it? :(

OP posts:
Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:23

Ah it's back! Sorry, thought it had been deleted for some reason!

OP posts:
MadameDefarge · 10/04/2013 21:27

I am afraid I don't understand your post. Are you saying your dh gave your ds a bottle of wine instead of squash to give to dd?

why would your dd need a bottle of anything? Is squash not always deleted.

Don't cry. Its quite funny really. Not that I am trying to minimise your upset, but who was the adult there? I mean, you were both there.

maybe ds made a mistake? did your dh say he had given a bottle of wine instead of squash? why would anyone ask for a bottle of squash anyway?

Sorry, its just a bit of a muddle.

How old are your dcs? Who was expected to dilute the squash?

Salmotrutta · 10/04/2013 21:28

There are threads every so often in chat about mistakes/accidents that befall due to mums (and dads) taking their eye off the ball.

The overwhelming response is for other posters to say "Don't beat yourself up! X happened to me/ I did Y once".

It was a mistake. And whilst it might have been very worrying it wasn't actual poison.

How old is the child and how much wine was it?

MadameDefarge · 10/04/2013 21:29

I mean is squash not always diluted? why would ds ask for a bottle and not pour a proper portion and dilute it? Or is he too young to make that judgement?

MadameDefarge · 10/04/2013 21:30

Did your ds just pick up the wrong bottle?

what is the IABU???

Salmotrutta · 10/04/2013 21:31

And yes- presumably he diluted it too? Otherwise I don't understand how the mistake arose?

E,g he absent-minded lay added wine to her bottle by mixing up the wine bottle with the squash bottle? Or something?

Salmotrutta · 10/04/2013 21:32

Confused

Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:32

Sorry, it is a bit all over the place!
Ds asked dh to make a bottle of squash for dd.
dh managed to dilute red wine instead of squash and take it to her
I found it discarded on the floor so she mustn't have had any
As soon as I realised I was really disturbed!
Im just worried really about what else he's going to do and if I trust Him to look after her now
He's got serious serious brain fog

OP posts:
zwischenzug · 10/04/2013 21:34

Probably best to keep alcohol out of the house until he sorts himself out.

Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:34

I was going to ask Aibu to be totally over reacting here!
I mean, I know he's just been diagnosed with depression and he's not thinking right but I'm wondering if he can be trusted with anything now

OP posts:
YoureAllABunchOfBastards · 10/04/2013 21:35

I bet she'll sleep tonight. You might want some Resolve for the morning though.

MadameDefarge · 10/04/2013 21:35

Do you mean a baby bottle with squash in it? Will leave that one to others comment on.

So her baby bottle had diluted red wine in it. was the squash also red?

It does sound a bit rubbish. And if your dh might well be more unwell than you think. Did you taste the diluted mixture?

Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:35

:)

OP posts:
MadameDefarge · 10/04/2013 21:36

how old are dd and ds?

Nishky · 10/04/2013 21:36

I poured wine into a glass and diluted it when I meant to make squash for my dc Blush

I suspect your dd will not have drunk any of it. Not really to dc's tastes

Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:37

Sorry the smiley face there was meant for the resolve joke!

Yes the squash is red too but the bottles look completely different !

OP posts:
Nishky · 10/04/2013 21:37

I did realise before I gave said glass to child!

directoroflegacy · 10/04/2013 21:37

Fwiw, I don't think there was anything sinister re: this, just him being away with the fairies
But you do realise that somebody is going to come along in a minute saying children shouldn't be drinking squash out of a bottle Wink
What else is dh doing that is upsetting you/ making you question dc's safety with him?

Doubtfuldaphne · 10/04/2013 21:37

Ds is 13 and dd is 26 months

OP posts:
kinkyfuckery · 10/04/2013 21:38

Firstly, you shouldn't be giving anyone squash in a baby bottle. If she's old enough for squash, she's old enough to not need it in a bottle.
Secondly, why was your DS asking your DH to get your DD something to drink? Isn't he old enough to get it himself? If not, why is he old enough to be responsible for deciding she needs some?
Thirdly, don't stress. It was an accident. I'm sure it wasn't intentional. Worst case she'd have drunk it and maybe displayed signs of being a bit tipsy (hilarious joke telling FTW!), or subdued, but heavily diluted wine wouldn't have cause any harm.

MadameDefarge · 10/04/2013 21:39

easy answer as mentioned above, no wine until his meds are sorted. and alcohol is not great with depression. but bear in mind it could have been a genuine mistake.

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Salmotrutta · 10/04/2013 21:39

Or drunk a bit then thought [bleurghhhh]. Smile

Don't be too hard on your DH. He may also be pre-occupied with the actual diagnosis of depression too.

This probably frightened him too, don't forget!

GlitterySkulls · 10/04/2013 21:39

you're DH put wine in your DD's bottle? Shock

um, wow. if he's stressed, then it's easy to see how it could have happened, hopefully she didn't drink any of it?

i'm sure he won't make a mistake like that again, he's probably had the fright of his life!

kinkyfuckery · 10/04/2013 21:39

But... does your DH make a habit of drinking wine when the children are still around? Not sure what time of day this was at.

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