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AIBU?

To think I may have cursed my child with middleagedteendom.

37 replies

IdiotishPrattle · 10/04/2013 15:08

DD (16) and her boyfriend are going to a Steampunk event. They are going dressed in 'character', no problem with that, they have attended other such events, mixed with other such young people similarly attired and had a great time.
This time it is being held in a venue outside of the city centre, with only the facilities available that belong to the venue, as its touristy, they can be quite pricey. DD has just told me they are planning on taking a picnic and flask of tea.
I jokingly suggested they took a picnic blanket as well, which she took to be a very good suggestion instead of a joke.

Where have I gone wrong with my parenting?
I feel like I've failed somehow.

They should be planning on slurping a couple of cans and eating bags of chips, while standing nonchalantly amongst these Steampunk, Gothic types, not taking a bloody flask of tea with them, like an auld biddy on a day trip.
Perhaps its my fault, but I blame places like the N.T, she must have had too much exposure when she was younger. I need to re read their 50 things to do malarky and see if it includes 'pottering around the gift shop', 'lugging a flask of tea' and 'commenting on the quality of the scones'.

So would I be unreasonable to hide all our flasks before the event?

I feel it would be a merciful action to save them from themselves, preventing them from prematurely looking for Bargain Hunt on iplayer and flicking through the Lakeland catalogue.

Is middleagedteendom the new rebellion of the youth of today? Might I be exposing them to ridicule and embarrassment, without these status symbols of revolution and youth culture? ( or flask and picnic blanket as I call it)

I'm just going to try and find Steampunk type cagoules now, in case it rains on the day, or maybe they still do those plastic headscarves my granny used to be fond of.

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AmandaPayneAteTooMuchChocolate · 10/04/2013 15:10

Snort.

Maybe all this sensible behaviour is to distract you from the copious quantities of snakebite they plan to consume and is purely for 'stomach lining' purposes?

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zukiecat · 10/04/2013 15:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FrauMoose · 10/04/2013 15:17

My daughter has had to tell me off for snickering at speeches by senior members at her school parents' evenings....

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Still18atheart · 10/04/2013 15:30

I was a middle aged teen. It got to the point where at 13 my dm told me that i tended to dress in frumpy looking clothes

Hmm

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CatsInCustard · 10/04/2013 15:39

Well personally I see nothing wrong with being prepared and saving money

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Boredwench · 10/04/2013 15:40

Hmm.... Torn...

One side of me thinks it's a thinly veiled way of boasting "look how well my children have turned out when they should be feral fuckwits like everyone else's"

Or

you've raised kids that aren't swayed by opinion and think for themselves

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IdiotishPrattle · 10/04/2013 15:47

I feel like I'm in some sort of Ad Fab type parenting set up sometimes. How did I get this sensible offspring, is this really my child?

Amanda Oh that could be it, I'll check to see if she makes milky tea!

Zukiecat I am sure she's channeling my Great Grandma, when DD is talking about how other people are dressed when wearing skimpy or impractical things. Grin

FrauMoose Glad its not just me then.

DD1 is just as bad, talking about possible university places with her friend, recommended one place because they are supposed to have a good Christmas market! Confused I dared her to ask about it on the Open Day, which she did when others asked about the night life etc, she has no shame in her premature middleageness.

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MrsTerryPratchett · 10/04/2013 15:50

You're fine. It's a form of revolution. They are actually non-conformists.

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motherinferior · 10/04/2013 15:51

Are you sure they aren't, in fact, just going to sneak off to swig cider and have wild teenage sex in his bedroom?

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TheAccidentalExhibitionist · 10/04/2013 15:55

I was like this as a teenager, very sensible - until I went to uni and learned to party.
She will have wild times in the future but you can be reassured she'll be the one getting everyone safely home at the end of the night.

BTW I don't see it as a boast, I would be equally concerned Grin

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Geeklover · 10/04/2013 15:59

I was a middle aged teen now I'm a teen middle aged Grin
Don't worry I'm sure she will make up for it.

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Scrazy · 10/04/2013 16:03

It's a rebellion against us, I say. Mine is the same, very sensible and mature beyond her years. Total non conformist and so different from the teens of today. I'm hoping she changes as she gets into her 20's Grin

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IdiotishPrattle · 10/04/2013 16:04

But Boredwench should I really be boasting about a teenager and a flask of tea? Is it a sign that they have turned out well or have I failed them somehow and they are now doomed to granny behaviour prematurely?

When I was a young warthog, I certainly wouldn't have taken a flask, I'd have gone to the pub instead, but certainly didn't think of myself as some 'feral fuckwit', just average teenage behaviour in those days of not much ID checking.

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Boredwench · 10/04/2013 16:49

Idiotish...

Look at as you like, you know mumsnet is full of competative parents trying to outdo each other.....anyway, putting my cautionary cynicism aside!!

Kids these days can't win, if they are unruly/rebellious then they're seen as 'feral fuckwits' as I elegantly put it! Or if they're mild mannered and prefer the 'middle aged' things you mentioned then they're seen as boring and unimaginative (look at some of the comments on a recent BBC article on said subject). On the whole I find kids are walking contradictions, it depends on the context whether they're unruly or not.

I think back to my childhood and we used to smoke weed whilst doing various physics based things (did a masters in astrophysics). Hard to be a 'rebel' with a joint in one hand when you're staying up all night finishing off some papers for uni the next day!! It depends who's asking the question and the person answering it!!

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badtime · 10/04/2013 17:39

A picnic basket is more in keeping with a steampunk theme than flinging a few things in a bag. Nothing to do with middle-agedness.

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ariadneoliver · 10/04/2013 18:04

Sounds fun, I wish I was young enough to be prematurely middle aged instead if just middle aged then I'd have the energy to make this steam punk picnic: cookingsteampunk.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/picnic-luncheon-plan.html
Smile

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MadamFolly · 10/04/2013 18:21

I was not that sensible as a teen or at uni but act comfortably middle aged now I am the grand old age of 23 :o

I am sensible with money, don't go out drinking much and am all interested in stuff like National Trust properties and MN.

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IdiotishPrattle · 10/04/2013 20:19

Ah so it's just being steam punk to take a flask and I don't have to worry she'll be subscribing to Caravaners Weekly next. Thank god for thatSmile

I might have mocked her a bit, but I love the fact she knows her own mind, even if it is a middleaged oneGrin

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WhispersOfWickedness · 10/04/2013 20:33

I was a middle aged teen. I spent many an evening waiting up for my mother and berating her when she got home late from the pub Grin
She has now got all her fingers and toes crossed that my own dc have their own serious teen rebellion involving lots of drugs, sex and tattoos HmmGrin

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landofsoapandglory · 10/04/2013 20:41

DS1(18) is a middleagedteen as well.

We were driving home from town today and he said "you know mother (I hate it when he calls me that), if you drove at 60 instead of 70, like I do, you'd get far more miles to the gallon!"

Then, after dinner I was in the kitchen and he came through and said, "good drying weather forecast for the weekend, mother!"

He and his friends are off to Malia after A levels and they have just realised they'd have been more suited to a more sedate resort!

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ubik · 10/04/2013 20:51

What us Steampunk?

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CuppaSarah · 10/04/2013 21:06

I think the whole tea and picnic thing is part of the steampunk culture. The fashions based around Victorian fashion with a twist, so I think drinking tea and having a lovey picnic is part of the whole 'experience'

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ubik · 10/04/2013 21:09

Blimey we used to take glo sticks and recreational drugs. How times have changed Shock

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RubyGates · 10/04/2013 21:10

Tea is the epitome of Steampunk.
Without tea and fancy cakes and lovely picnic rugs how would one show off one's lovely finary.

You have reached the pinacle of parenthood. Take a bow. Grin

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OrangeFootedScrubfowl · 11/04/2013 00:24

I was a middle aged teen and I sadly never grew out of it.

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