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AIBU?

To bloody love my cosy bed.

33 replies

SamuelWestsMistress · 09/04/2013 20:44

DH is working late so I decided to come to bed and it's so cosy and comfy and warm. It's better now than it ever is when DH is in it. Why do we have to share our beds?

AIBU to think that having a bed each would be a more practical idea? I love my husband but he's large, hairy, sweaty and he sleep gropes. I also love to sprawl out which doesnt work when he's in it. He doesn't agree on separate beds.

OP posts:
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MrscremeEgg · 09/04/2013 20:45

Separate beds are a brilliant idea.

Nothing wrong with separate rooms, I say. With conjugal visits, of course.

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PoppyAmex · 09/04/2013 20:47

I can't empathise much because I enjoy sleeping with DH (and 1 yo DD at the moment) but the answer for us was a super king bed with a mattress with two separate "spring" firmness levels (but no gap in the middle IYSWIM).

Happy sleeping here.

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70isaLimitNotaTarget · 09/04/2013 20:47

What's wrong with large, sweaty hairy husbands Confused ?

Proud keeper of such a model myself Wink

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nokidshere · 09/04/2013 20:49

Separate rooms are the way to go! We have slept apart for years now and we both benefit from it! DH has total darkness, heating on, duvet all wrapped around him like we were living in the bloody antartic and is unbelieveably grumpy if he doesn't get 8 hours.

I sleep with the windows and blinds open no matter how cold it is, and often with a fan on too. Have a lightweight duvet, and no heating. I toss and turn and regularly have as little as 3-4 hours a night.

We are just not compatible sleeping partners! It doesn't affect our sex lives, or our emotional connection and we have been together for over 30 years, married for 26 of them!

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kinkyfuckery · 09/04/2013 20:57

I love not having to share a bed (am currently single, though have an almost-5-year-old climb in most nights) especially when falling asleep. I reckon if I was ever to cohabitate again I would need to insist on separate beds, if not separate rooms!

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Undertone · 09/04/2013 21:59

Singleton here also. My (king size) bed is like a soft, billowy, clean, colour-coordinated palace. Made out of fabulously expensive fabric.

The thought of sharing it makes me feel aggressive. If i ever let a man darken my door again he can bring a sleeping bag and i will firmly point him in the direction of the sofa... Which is also beautiful, so maybe i would need to cover it in towels or something in case he drools like a st Bernard or something. But it would have to be my brash towel. Not my gorgeous fluffy bathroom towels... Maybe it would just be easier to make him sleep on the floor?

Yep gonna be single for a while.

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Undertone · 09/04/2013 22:00

Brash towel?? Beach towel rather.

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70isaLimitNotaTarget · 09/04/2013 22:05

Undertone just take a leaf out of the Praying Mantis's book.

Mate then eat the male.
Problem solved Wink

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susiedaisy · 09/04/2013 22:06

Another singleton here and first thing I did when I became single was buy a lovely new double bed and its all mine, in fact I'm quite possessive over it and don't really even like the kids sitting on it, the thought of someone's else drool, sweat and pubes on it makes me feel positively nauseous Grin I would love a bed like the one out of the film bed knobs and broomsticks where you could see the whole world but from the comfort of your own bedSmile!

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Undertone · 09/04/2013 22:10

Yes! Do men come with nutrition information and recommended cooking times printed on them, like roasting joints from Sainsburys? That would be handy. I could inform my relationship choices with info on how much saturated fat he contained.

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Undertone · 09/04/2013 22:12
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susiedaisy · 09/04/2013 22:13
Grin
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LadyBeagleEyes · 09/04/2013 22:17

Having your bed to yourself is the very very best thing about being single.
Actually, having your own home is pretty good too.
I couldn't share any more, apart from teen ds, who's usually holed up in his room so doesn't get in the way too much.

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AgentZigzag · 09/04/2013 22:35

I'm a bit reluctant to revel in my cosy bed because I over-reveled one night a few years ago, laying there in crisp clean bedding, so grateful to have such a comfy bed to sink into, probably strayed into feeling a bit smug tbh - and then 'D'cat2 jumped up onto me and pissed all over the bed.

Angry

She could tell I wasn't too pleased and has only done it in the corner since hasn't done it since.

Single duvets are and excellent way to go though, I hate DH turning over and flapping the duvet letting all the cold air in.

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redwellybluewelly · 09/04/2013 22:59

Since having DD we usually sleep apart in separate rooms. Hasn't affected sex life and in fact the nights DD sleeps well and DH comes to bed early I get no sleep due to his snoring and general twitching and duvet stealing antics.

YANBU. I love my bed too.

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lookoveryourshouldernow · 09/04/2013 23:33

... separate rooms - way to go ......

My DH likes to sleep with window fully open - even in the Winter and the radio tuned in to the World Service..... it used to give me horrendous nightmares as the stuff they mentioned filtered through and corrupted my dreams...

I upped and decamped to the spare room years ago - now it is a haven of squishy cushions and co-ordinated bedlinen and very very calm...

Love it - I can make a star shape anytime that I want - I can toss/turn and snore to my hearts contents - throw the duvet off - throw the duvet on or wrap it around my leg backwards and forwards - cuddle the cushions and just drift off...

...but luckily we don't have to pay any "bedroom tax"

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FadBook · 09/04/2013 23:44


I love my bed too. We've just had a new firmer mattress to sort mine and dp's backs out. I love my bed more when DP isn't snoring, farting, slobber and sweating his boy-ness in it Angry

We randomly go in separate beds if dd doesn't sleep well (she comes with me, DP in spare room then I can normally get dd back to sleep back in her room and have bed to myself Blush) but most of the time we sleep together. I like the idea of my own bed(room) though Grin
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ShadowsCollideWithPeople · 10/04/2013 00:14

YANBU. I am a little bit in love with my bed. A lot in love, actually. In our last place (we rent) DP and I had a king size. Then we moved to our current house, and had a normal double. As we are both tall, we spent a week smushed into a bed that felt as though it was of lilliputian proportions, constantly kneeing and elbowing each other. Then I cracked and went out and bought a super king. Ahhhh. Loads of space. We have a very firm mattress, which is heavenly (also, as renters, it is the very first bed and mattress we have ever owned. It's all brand new, just ours). We have only lovely, calming, all white, high thread count bed linen.

Now, my bed is a gorgeous haven, and DP and I no longer wake up wanting to murder each other Grin. It does help that we both work shifts/odd hours, so about 50% of the time I'm sleeping when he is working and vice versa. So we each get our alone bed time where we get to starfish, but also get nights where we can snuggle up together. I highly recommend it!

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LovePickles · 10/04/2013 00:19

I can't sleep in my bed alone, I get scared! DP likes to sleep right at the other end anyway, so I practically have the lot - with the added knowledge of him being close in case ghosts appear!

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sjupes · 10/04/2013 00:39

Our old mattress was heaven but stupid dp wanted a 'whole new bed' which sucks completely. The mattress is firm but with no support and feels like cardboard :( our old one was a nasa mattress - £600 off pure comfort :)

Right now i'm pregnant and uncomfortable anyway so i tend to sleep at the bottom of our bed by dps feet.

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TerraNotSoFirma · 10/04/2013 00:49

My ideal set up (when I win. Lotto and build My dream house) will be like this....imagine the entire top floor of a very large house.......my dressing room, my bathroom, my bedroom, our bedroom (for the conjugal vists), his bathroom, his bedroom then a wee room for his playstation to live in.

I can but dream.

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AgentZigzag · 10/04/2013 01:01

'i tend to sleep at the bottom of our bed by dps feet.'

That would be an interesting thread in the feminist section Grin Grin

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NatashaBee · 10/04/2013 01:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ullena · 10/04/2013 02:00
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scripsi · 10/04/2013 02:15

I am now awake and making a 2am cuppa due to DH's snoring, so separate rooms have a particular appeal tonight.

If we're talking about comfortable beds, what is your favourite bedding and bed? I wonder what the best mattress/bed money could buy is.

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