I feel a bit bad, ignored the door

[hairtearing]

I have Members of my family often like to visit unnanounced during the day.
But today I feel like absolute death, shivering,shaking,snotty nose,bad cough, painful chest and feel very sick and very,very lethargic.
I already have issues due to blood loss/contraception this only makes it worse.
I have the DC , the house is a tip , I look like hell and last thing I want to do is to have to make tea and conversation.
For all I know it could have been something else but I ignored the door
am I a bad person?

[Patchouli]

Nope.
It's the chance you take when you call on someone unannounced.

[newbiefrugalgal]

Nope. But would they know if you were at home?
Car outside?
Noise of DC?

[CheCazzo]

The risk you take, when visiting unannounced, is that the door will not be answered. If it was urgent they'd ring. If they were worried you didn't answer because you're lying there dead - well, they'd ring.
Go back to bed, get better and stop worrying about such small stuff.

[hairtearing]

Possibly I didn't think that far, I feel a bit bad they just want to visit granddc but I don't want to be judged for my tip of a house when all i want to do is crawl into a hole.

[CheCazzo]

Then let them ring and make arrangements like other reasonable people do!

[kelb6180]

I always ignore my door when I can't be bothered lol

And when asked, I say "oh I must have been in the shower"

[EyesCrossedLegsAkimbo]

If they're not the sort of family that would take one look at you and tell you to get to bed and look after the DC while you rest, then you did the right thing.

[starfishmummy]

No yanbu.
There is no law to say you have to answer the door or the phone kf you don't want to, or are unwell

[VisualiseAHorse]

YANBU - I've done before when I've felt really shit.

[AnyFucker]

I never answer the door, and often the phone, if I am not expecting someone/thing

[Longdistance]

I never answer the door, unless I know who it is who has prearranged to come. People know this of me, so know well to call before hand.

Did they not want to take the kids off your hands while you recooperate in bed? Hope you feel better soon.

[mrsjay]

MY door has just gone I didnt answer it I am pmsy not dressed and probably whiff a bit
I wasn't expecting anybody if it was important they will call back or if it is urgent they would have phoned me first meh just because somebody knocks doesn't mean you have to answer ever. OP i hope you feel better soon ,

[rockinhippy]

YADNBU - I never open my door unless I know its the postie etc, if people want to visit, they pick up the damn phone & let me know, otherwise they can sod right off are not welcome - consequently, they always ring first

Maybe this can be the start of a more assertive you - ask if they visited - be honest that you were in, but feeling ill I not in the mood for visitors & enjoying quiet time with the DCs , finish off with - "it's a pity you didn't ring first, that way I could have warned you, maybe that would be a good idea in future"


Wishing You better soon

[hairtearing]

Thanks for replies,
Yeah I generally ring plus I wouldn't like to be the person who turns up to someone feeling ill making them feel like the need to adopt 'host mode'

Yeah same mrsjay I probably stink too, although in the midst of pee smell potty training hell I smell better in here lol.

They didn't know I was ill, I don't think anyway.

It puts you on edge though like you can't relax in your own home.

[oldraver]

I dont answer the door if I dont want too in my pj's. I even refused to answer the door to someone with a clipboard who looked through my window and saw me after they had knocked....they seemed quite puzzled.

[Feminine]

Given you are poorly, I'll bet they would be grateful to have been kept out.

Although you are never going to be able to ask are you?

Hope you feel better very soon!

[PelvicFloorClenchReminder]

Don't feel bad, this is the reason why doors were invented! Hope you feel better soon

[hairtearing]

Thanks I feel like I have the plague or something, (just slightly exaggerating)

[wanderings]

Harry Potter: "Sir, why couldn't we just Apparate directly into your old colleague's house?"

Dumbledore: "Because it would be quite as rude as kicking down the front door. Courtesy dicates that we offer fellow wizards the opportunity of refusing us entry."

(From "Half Blood Prince")

[MissFredi]

YANBU. I don't get many people round but they always let me know (even my grandma texts first) unless its the postman, and I can tell its the postman for his bright orange coat! Anyone else can either go away or deal with "not ready for humans" me. It's not a pretty sight.

[IsaacCox]

YANBU. I only answer the door when I know who it is or if it's the postie. I never answer the phone either unless I know who it is.

Hope you feel better soon

[scarletforya]

Ha! Of course you're not a bad person. I only answer the door to people I know are coming or maybe meter readers if I'm feeling in the mood.

Everyone else can feck off make an appointment like any civilized person would do!

[ThoseWomenWereInTheNip]

Nope. I also have a perfectly positioned mirror on the wall that lets me see who's at the door without any effort from me. So i can see who I'm ignoring. :o