I think I really might be BU here, in which case it would be really interesting to hear other opinions. I'm just getting slightly bemused by friends who do all their casual socialising with their DH tagging along.
To put it in context, I moved to where I live when pg so all my local friends are other mums with a 1yo-ish. I'm now back at work f/t so can only meet them at the weekend. DP works most weekends. Now I really do appreciate that for the majority of couples the weekend is family time. I do try not to encroach upon that and ask friends to do something that would eat into their time together, but I like to catch up with the other mums I met during mat leave and so I tend to ask if they are free for a quick coffee. It's been a few months back at work now so I've learnt which friends would rather not do something like that on the weekend, which is fine (I see them if we go out in the evening or we rearrange bigger group meet-ups at soft play etc). But there are a couple of friends who seem happy to meet up quickly, so I'll generally go to them for an hour or so, quick coffee and catch up, the babies have a play, all nice.
However the bit that bemuses me is that their DH always sits with us too. This is quite different from how me and DP are, which is why I might be BU about this. If a friend of mine comes to our house and DP is in, he comes and has a chat for half an hour or so, plays with the kids if there are any, but then he will excuse himself and go and do something else (normally housework, which is great ). The logic being that it is my friend who is visiting, and while of course we like to know each other's friends and get on with them, we also appreciate the other person might want a bit of time alone to catch up with their friend. Other mums I visit, their DH sits in the room with us ? not really getting involved in the conversation, not really playing with the kids, just sitting there as if... well, as if it has been a bit enforced. They always know if DP is not coming with me. And as I mentioned before, no one is old friends, these are new friends made through baby groups etc.
This is just one example, but it is the one that has really intrigued me. Do other people always catch up with friends with their DH with them? Are DP and I really odd for not doing all our socialising together?
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AIBU?
Re meeting other mums and always having DH/DP with you?
30 replies
Thurlow · 03/04/2013 10:41
OP posts:
Coconutty ·
03/04/2013 10:48
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Coconutty ·
03/04/2013 10:49
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