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AIBU to throttle DD???!!

(467 Posts)
matchpoint Sun 31-Mar-13 21:41:22

Roughly four hours later and I am still frothing at the mouth.

Backstory: DD is 4 years old, and she and her sister have received (too) many Easter eggs from school, family friends, various well-meaning relatives etc. Both had a Creme egg for a treat after dinner, and the rest of their haul of Easter eggs are living in the kitchen to be dished out as appropriate over the next year/eaten by me (seriously, there are a lot).

I come downstairs to get DD up for bathtime, and she has opened and eaten parts of five eggs, two of which she knew were not hers. There was chocolate in little bits all over the floor, some of which melted and it took ages to clean up. angry

When asked about it, DD lied to my face that it wasn't her, but eventually fessed up (her sister is innocent in this affair). I went absolutely batshit crazy at her, and I don't feel guilty. She was sneaky, greedy and she lied to my face. She knows better. DD was sent straight to bed, no bath, no story, cried for ages, now asleep.

I'm thinking that she gets no more Easter eggs; and also want to ban her from the iPad for the next week. DH is a bit of a softy, and reckons being shouted at and sent to bed was punishment enough.

DH thinks this is too harsh; my worry is that she will see it as a not a bad trade-off---snuck into Easter eggs, Mummy shouted a bit, but she still got chocolate. MN thoughts please??

essexmumma Sun 31-Mar-13 21:46:42

I think going to bed and being told off is enough tbh. I'm not soft on my DD's at all and am always told I expect too much / am too strict but taking all her eggs?? I think that's far too much.

She is little, she sneaked some extra chocolate and tried to cover her tracks - no big deal. I think she is just being 4.

Annunziata Sun 31-Mar-13 21:49:33

She is 4. Far, far too harsh. She's just overexcited, not sneaky or greedy.

RubixCube Sun 31-Mar-13 21:50:00

Little kids are like this unfortunely.I have to hide kids eggs on top of cupboard as i know my 4year wouldn't be able to help herself.I think you have already punished her with no bath and story so i do agree with you dh

Sharptic Sun 31-Mar-13 21:50:19

I don't think she deserves any more punishment.

All those eggs are temptation enough for anyone, never mind a 4 yr old. It sounds as though she got the message that she misbehaved, leave it at that.

AllThatGlistens Sun 31-Mar-13 21:52:23

She's 4, that's still v v young for such a harsh punishment! Being sent to bed crying without a story is more than enough to make your point to her sad

AgentZigzag Sun 31-Mar-13 21:52:55

I know she has to learn and you weren't unreasonable to pick her up on it, but being so angry and doing all those things to her is a bit OTT IMO.

Your DH isn't being soft, he understands this is only a 4 YO.

She was technically the things you call her, sneaky/greedy/liar, but they're such huge concepts to weight round a small childs neck, try not to define her as those things or you might find you'll have a self fulfilling prophecy on your hands.

WorraLiberty Sun 31-Mar-13 21:54:37

I think she's had punishment enough.

When you say she was allowed one creme egg after dinner, what that all the chocolate she was allowed to eat today?

Iaintdunnuffink Sun 31-Mar-13 21:56:55

Sneaking, greed and lying to your face! She's 4 and shouldn't have done it but she's 4. To go bat shit crazy sounds OTT, you can be firm and discipline whilst still remaining calm and rational.

NumericalMum Sun 31-Mar-13 21:57:00

she is 4? That seemed extremely harsh to me. And you are still angry a few hours later. Do you have anger issues? Have you thought of counselling?

gordyslovesheep Sun 31-Mar-13 21:57:06

she's 4 - she's little, I think you are over reacting

Phantomteadrinker Sun 31-Mar-13 21:59:45

Yabu, she's 4, it's Easter and she's surrounded by chocolate. Tell her off for fibbing but I think anything else is ott

macdoodle Sun 31-Mar-13 21:59:46

she's 4 sad

LadyWidmerpool Sun 31-Mar-13 22:01:49

I think you went OTT and if you had let your DD have more fun with her eggs today this could all have been avoided. There's no excuse to go 'batshit crazy' at a 4 year old. Do you do this often? Maybe she lied to you because she's scared of you.

midastouch Sun 31-Mar-13 22:02:02

I think thats a little harsh at 4 years old its still very young, my DS 3.9 started munching away on his easter egg for breakfast without even asking, i let him finish a bit off and put it out of his site. I wouldnt be able to resist chocolate infront of my face like that how can i expect DCs to. Ive never let my DCs cry in bed even when DS smashed my laptop screen on purpose!

RunningAgain Sun 31-Mar-13 22:02:52

You sound like you were rather nasty to her, op. I feel sorry for your little 4 year old girl. Horrible behaviour by you tbh sad.

SecretLindtBunny Sun 31-Mar-13 22:04:34

Remove 2 from her haul and give them to the one they were nicked off or eat them yourself, and let her know that the reason she is losing them is she took two that did not belong to her.

threesypeesy Sun 31-Mar-13 22:04:40

Oh that's harsh going she's only 4!! It's Easter,she's excited and its only chocolate no harm done

It's YOUR job to hide the eggs

Willpower and understanding patience are not known qualities in 4 year olds you daft bat wink

Stepissue Sun 31-Mar-13 22:06:12

She's 4, I feel sorry for the poor thing sad

FeijoaVodkaAndCheezels Sun 31-Mar-13 22:06:29

Lets buy little kids lots and lots of chocolate. Because yeah, that's always going to end well.

I think the punishment so far was appropriate, but no more than that.

I think this may be a unanimous AIBU!

ChippingInIsEggceptional Sun 31-Mar-13 22:09:59

She is 4. FOUR. It's her first real Easter. Cut the kid a break!! I don't know how you stopped yourself laughing tbh.

... and I'm the one normally advocating more 70's parenting and less of this liberal childcentric shit grin

What's the point in pushing and pushing and pushing for the truth then not calmly discussing it with her, but going ballistic WTF is she going to learn from that - to lie better? Calm down and rethink your parenting strategy with regards to 'the truth' and discussion v going ballistic.

Floggingmolly Sun 31-Mar-13 22:11:46

Oh ffs! If you hadn't controlled access to the fecking eggs in the first place, she mightn't have felt the need to do it behind your back. One creme egg on Easter Sunday?
So many threads about the evil poison that are Easter eggs at the moment...
It's just chocolate.

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood Sun 31-Mar-13 22:12:07

I am a frequent lurker and very occasional poster, but feel moved to say that your reaction to a childish misdemeanour is shocking and truly horrible. It is your behaviour that needs focussing on not hers. It's never appropriate to go 'batshit crazy' at your child and not even regret it afterwards.

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