To expect dialogue on here to be civil and diplomatic most of the time?

(249 Posts)
cupcakemumma Sun 31-Mar-13 20:30:50

Feeling so sick and tired of many threads on this amazing site being poisoned by unkind responses. There is one thing being direct and all, but seriously, I cannot imagine that the tone used by some MN posters would be used outside outside of this place in the wider world and welcomed. Some people seem to enjoy getting a kick out of speaking to others in an over the top spikey way on here, generating responses picking people's words to pieces like amateur lawyers.

What do you all think, or is it just me? Can't we all just get along and support one another and enjoy each other's company in diplomatic way? What is the point of being on here if time isn't spent being pleasant?

confused

Oh Lady I made a real hash of it I really did. Best you didn't see it. grin

Stepissue Mon 01-Apr-13 20:47:47

If we're doing confessions... I watch and SkyPlus Jeremy Kyle blush

Sounds like we need an amnesty thread for everyone to confess their MN mistakes.

Or terrible daytime TV habits. I watch Doctors BBC1 weekdays 1.45

Maryz Mon 01-Apr-13 20:52:47

You see AmI, that's great. I do think many people would apologise if it was pointed out to them on the thread if they are being particularly arsy. I certainly do.

Whereas I feel resentful on threads like this with accusations of "bullying gangs" and "people who feel they can do what they like" etc.

Oh my goodness, Sparkling. That went arseabouttit didn't it.

LadyBeaEGGleEyes Mon 01-Apr-13 20:59:23

I'm a Wright Stuff/This Morning person myself.
And I <confession> like Holly and Phil.
I used to watch Doctors till Jimmy got kidnapped by the weird bother and sister and his girlfriend went into witness protection and didn't he dye his hair a silly colour?
I got totally lost after that.

cupcakemumma Mon 01-Apr-13 21:30:09

Wow Sparkling! There were some right 'treasures' with a lovely way with words getting stuck into your post there. From lighthearted to lary in 0-60! Poor you sad

Should that Webchat happen, it would have a lot of people interested, so hope it would work out.
In fact, I read an interview recently with Ant McPartlin where he explained that both his wife and he are experiencing conception problems. Could be a relevant choice for a Webchat considering the fact that there are many people on here joining forums on the same.

girliefriend Mon 01-Apr-13 21:37:51

yanbu - op

Reported a post for the first time this week after the op got called a cunt when her original post had been about her neighbours complaining about the noise her ill dd had been making at night.

It is just so unnecessary.

AmIthatWintry Mon 01-Apr-13 21:44:09

oh, girliefriend, that was maybe me. I reported myself.

AmIthatWintry Mon 01-Apr-13 21:46:24

Although as the mother of a child with ASN, I get quite uppity at flippant use of labels

crashdoll Mon 01-Apr-13 21:50:20

"Even my Ant and Dec for a webchat thread went a bit horrible."

Well, what do you expect starting a thread about those irritants?! wink

*cupcake I think the Ant and Dec thread demonstrates my point quite well. grin

Thanks crash. sad

WorraLiberty Mon 01-Apr-13 22:05:19

OMG Sparkling I posted on that thread to say 'Yes to Ant n Dec' but didn't actually bother reading it.

Of all the threads to descend into shittiness?!?! shock

You should've started a BF/FF thread instead grin

I know Worra. It was my fault for saying there was 'unanimous love' for them both I suppose. I didn't think they were that controversial. shock

WorraLiberty Mon 01-Apr-13 22:12:12

Meh! They're about as controversial as a pair of wet socks (as much as I love them).

It's A & D for goodness sake...not Gary Glitter.

Some people would start an argument in an empty room if the mood took them grin

Has anyone ever derailed a webchat I wonder?

BoulevardOfBrokenSleep Mon 01-Apr-13 22:13:39

See, I think a lot of the shite is due to people reading the OP and not the thread.

And being a diligent little academic, I will back this up with an example.

OP - AIBU to make this child pay for breaking DS' £70 toy?
MN Consenus - YANBU, what was the toy?
OP - A Lego thingy.
MN - Er... Lego just goes back together you know.
OP - Oh shit, seriously?! What an idiot I am, thanks guys.

Next 50 posters - are you STUPID? Why don't you just rebuild the Lego?

Not necessarily from any malice - though a lot of them were quite rude - they just didn't bother to RTFT and see that OP had seen the error of her ways, and their point had already been made. Repeatedly.

cupcakemumma Mon 01-Apr-13 22:19:45

Certainly does Sparklingbrook. Well if Ant and Dec do get to do a Webchat on here then you'll have a story to share with them! smile

OMG there is now a thread dissing Waynes World. shock

nenevomito Mon 01-Apr-13 22:27:30

Dissing Waynes World? shock

the cunts. How dare they. That's my Yoof that is.

Stepissue Mon 01-Apr-13 22:32:47

and a thread saying another thread is vile, and on the second thread 'po' has been called, couldn't make it up grin

It's all too much for me, I'm going to watch GoT grin

cupcakemumma Mon 01-Apr-13 22:53:07

Boulevard, true, sometimes this is the case with people not reading through a full thread. Though some cases I came across yesterday were members just kicking off and being unashamedly nasty a few views in, even saying 'Yes I am being rude' after they were challenged.

ok. every community self reglates. and has moments which seem like big fights but which are really about forcing each other to take stock a bit. i certainly dont feel like any more navel gazing. but what i have takenwaway from this is that it is up to me as an individual to challenge on a thread and or report. viciousness contempt and aggression are never acceptable. feisty engagement however is the heart of mn.

Arabesque Tue 02-Apr-13 10:32:40

i do think some (me included!) posters spend way too much time on here and to amuse themselves they get stuck into threads just to 'show off' or entertain themselves or their mn mates. [quote]

^

Also, I think some posters just don't have any boundaries. Most of us have a certain level of hostility or aggression to which we can be pushed but once we reach it we refuse to be pushed any further and withdraw from the thread. But some posters have no levels beyond which they cannot be pushed and become increasingly rude, aggressive or venomous to the point where there really is no point in engaging with them. I think there really is a knack of knowing when to just think 'enough' and refuse to continue talking to someone who's just gone way beyond what is acceptable or rational behaviour.

CherylTrole Tue 02-Apr-13 20:43:19

Its the denial of any wrong doing that pisses me off. You know the "Oh I dont know what you are on about"
" Its not/ we are not like like at all"
" Well some posters are fair game"
Well bollocks to that!! I am not a liar. I have seen it all on here. Needless to say someone will say Im talking bollocks again....

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