Aibu - if you saw someone fall over would you go and help them up or would you leave them?

(86 Posts)
HepzibahFlurge Thu 28-Mar-13 15:12:36

I have bone cancer in my entire left leg and have difficulty walking but love taking my dog out onto a field behind my flat. I Usually let her off the lead to run after a ball which she loves but I know that if my dog is off the lead and sees another dog she will run to it to try and play. Therefore if I see another dog I will automatically put mine back on the lead as there is no way I can run after her. She is a well behaved dog on the lead and has been to training classes.

The other day out walking I saw a couple with a puppy off the lead. Straight away I put my dog on the lead. The puppy came running over and started pestering mine. We had been out for a while so I decided to go home. Their dog followed me and still kept pestering after mine. The puppy's owners kept calling her to come to them (which she ignored) but didn't come over and take her away

I went to turn to put my poo bag in the bin as my dog pulled on the lead in the opposite direction. This caught me by surprise and I fell over flat on my face into a pool of mud. This is the first time my dog has ever done this to me

The fall was heavy and winded me and I started to cry. What upset me even more was that still the couple did not put their dog on the lead and worse didn't come over to help me out of the mud and just stood and laughed. I begged for help to get up as I couldn't get up but they ignored me. Luckily I fell on my non -cancer leg as could have done myself serious damage. At this stage I was lying on the ground with my dog sat next to me and their puppy jumping on me.

Luckily my mum had arrived to visit me and ran to the field and helped me up. She got hold of my dog and the other couples and shouted 'Come and get your dog'. Eventually they came over but with no questions about how I was and no offers of help. They took their dog and walked off (Still with it off the lead). I went home and cried as I was shocked by the fall

Both me and my mum were shocked that people would not help a person up when they fell over. I know it was my dog which made me fall so will need to think about where I walk her in future for my safety

Would you help someone up who fell over? or would you leave them and laugh?

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts Thu 28-Mar-13 15:32:14

They were utter shites. I am so angry and sad to hear they behaved like that towards you.

An elderly man slipped over on the high street near me and dropped his shopping, which went flying all over the pavement. A lady (presumably his wife) was with him but she didn't look strong enough to lift him up. I am thankful to say that half a dozen people (myself included) ran over to help him up & gather up the shopping.

Machli Thu 28-Mar-13 15:32:20

I would. I have. I hope you're ok now.

Hullygully Thu 28-Mar-13 15:33:24

Any decent person would have helped.

Of course they would.

Pore ol you xx

justpaddling Thu 28-Mar-13 15:35:11

I would help but I would wait a.minute before I did. This is only because if I fall over I feel a total idiot, clamber to my feet looking around hoping no one saw me and I hate people fussing. I assume others may feel the same. However if I'd hurt myself I would hope to be offered some assistance. If the person did not get up immediately I'd definately go and help in whatever way I could.

MechanicalTheatre Thu 28-Mar-13 15:35:36

What utter twats. Sorry you had such a horrible experience.

I was quite heartened recently to see everyone rushing to help a young woman who fainted on a train. Literally everyone in the carriage was asking if she was ok, if she needed a tissue/water/something to eat, and then two people she didn't know got off at her stop and offered to walk her home. This is in London, a city that people say so often is "unfriendly". I was so cheered up by everyone offering to help her.

MyNameIsAnAnagram Thu 28-Mar-13 15:38:48

I would have yes.

Sadly your experience doesn't surprise me though as I am 33 wks pregnant and fell over yesterday in a supermaket carpark, right on to my front and no-one came to help. My DH was knocked off his bike years ago into a main road and no-one stopped for him either.

I hope you are ok and not too shaken up.

i agree with all the pp. i tend to keep myself to myself when out and about... but if i see someone fall/having probs or whatever, then i would defo help.

Summerblaze Thu 28-Mar-13 15:50:25

I certainly would have done and have in the past gone over to help someone.

My uncle recently had a massive heart attack in a service station car park. Luckily he had got out of the car and collapsed. A couple stopped to help him. If they hadn't he would most definitely had died.

What these people did to you was cruel. It wasn't as if you fell and they waited to see if you got up and did the whole "gosh I hope noone saw me" thing. You were crying and asking for help. What nasty bastards. I hope you are ok.

rumbelina Thu 28-Mar-13 15:52:17

They are not the norm, stupid twats. I would offer help to anyone who fell, regardless of age or ability. It's common decency.

Try not to let the buggers get you down. Sorry about your cancer sad

Footface Thu 28-Mar-13 15:54:35

Disgusting behaviour from the couple. They should be ashamed. Hope you're feeling a bit better now

thebody Thu 28-Mar-13 15:54:56

Nobody I know from any age or generation would not have failed to help you.

I guess 99.9% of human beings would have.

Think you were very unlucky and they are totally disgraceful.

Hope you are ok op, please don't take this to heart, most people are normal nice.

DoubleLifeIsALifeHalved Thu 28-Mar-13 15:58:12

Complete bastards. Poor you, that must have hurt, not just physically.

ChunkyPickle Thu 28-Mar-13 16:00:53

Not the norm at all - I would have come over to help (and have done when I've seen people fall), and even if you'd got up I would have been over apologising and checking you were OK.

angelos02 Thu 28-Mar-13 16:01:41

I would have thought it was a natural human instinct to help someone in that instance. I know I have. When I was younger (early 20's) there was a man clearly drunk collapsed over and I helped him up.

neverputasockinatoaster Thu 28-Mar-13 16:51:13

I would have come to see if you needed help.

Years ago my Grandfather slipped on a patch of ice and fell. He lay on the ground calling for help as he couldn't get up. He was ignored by a large number of people, one couple waved cheerily at him as they walked past.

He had broken his hip.

xigris Thu 28-Mar-13 16:56:55

Utter utter wankers. That's shocking behaviour. One of the school mums tripped and fell over in front of me yesterday and everyone rushed to help her up, she was fine but that's not the point. Those filthy people are the exception rather than the rule ime. I really feel for you and hope that karma catches up with them soon. flowers for you

DeepRedBetty Thu 28-Mar-13 17:02:41

I was all prepared to wonder if it was a case of the crowd all waiting for someone else to do something - which is a recognised phenomenon in busy public places, or a thinking you were drunk situation, which might put some people off. But it's utter obvious that neither of those two scenarios could possibly apply in which case I sincerely hope their puppy craps all over their house and chews one of each of their shoes.

HepzibahFlurge Thu 28-Mar-13 17:05:06

Thank you everyone for your good wishes
Its a shame that what happened to me seems to be a common event which I find really sad
I am fine - my leg is really bruised and sore but that's all - I am so relieved that I fell on that leg as the last time I fell on my cancer leg I broke my hip and needed a hip replacement. Currently waiting on a knee replacement (again cancer leg). My oncologist checked me over this morning and I was still able to have my chemo which was one of my worries

Hope we won't bump into that couple again as DH is so cross (still)

I agree - I want karma to bite them on the bum!

cuteboots Thu 28-Mar-13 17:05:18

What total twats ! I hope you are ok. I would have helped you but Im afraid there alot of people who just dont want to get involved nowadays. Very sad state of affairs

Mama1980 Thu 28-Mar-13 17:05:33

This awful. I have Serious motility issues following a car crash 5 years ago currently wheelchair bound. I fall over regularly and never once has no one stopped to help me, I usually get people rushing over instantly, as I would do. I hope you're ok and think you were just unlucky to meet these awful people!

trinity0097 Thu 28-Mar-13 17:08:12

If someone fell over I would wait a moment first before helping, I.e. if they got up and appeared fine I wouldn't rush over, but if they remained on the floor, had split shopping etc i would obviously help them.

EarlyInTheMorning Thu 28-Mar-13 17:09:26

Absolutely 100% I would have helped. What a pair of idiots. Hope you're okay OP.thanks

Mumsyblouse Thu 28-Mar-13 17:10:05

I have fainted a few times in public, and most times, people stop to help and I've had some very good experiences with strangers helping me (e.g. once giving me money after I was locked out and needed to get a taxi to my friend's house even though they knew they would never get it back). But, I did once faint as the Tube doors were opening onto the platform, and yes, a lot of people did sigh/walk over me, until a lovely Tube employee came to help. So, in the main, I have had positive experiences and always help others (indeed helped a partially sighted guy this week who had got confused by roadworkds) but the odd time I've seen the less caring side of some people.

HortyGal Thu 28-Mar-13 17:10:15

I think you met a couple of sociopaths. They cannot help it, they have differently wired brains.

I hope your leg improves HepzibahFlurge.

Sparklingbrook Thu 28-Mar-13 17:10:36

I can't believe how awful they were. How could you not only stand there doing nothing, but laugh while their dog leaps on you? angry

What is the matter with people? sad

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