or is it actually impossible to keep a tidy house

(131 Posts)

and get food on the table and do anything fucking at all if you a 1 and a 2 year old child? I wanted to stay home with I love them but if I were at work my house would be clean right? it's fucking pig style, by the dh gets home and we get them to bed and do the dishes there's no time to do anything else. then we just go to bed. sad

idiuntno57 Tue 19-Mar-13 20:52:35

i have x4 DS and it is chaos.

i sometimes remind myself -unsuccessfully- that I will miss it when they are gone.

since DS1 is only 8 its gonna be a while confused

CatsRule Tue 19-Mar-13 20:58:16

My 1yr old ds is a pro at ransacking and destruction! I work full time and my house is only ever tidy if my lovely mum has visited and cleaned and tidied up for us while.we're at work...ds takes about 1 minute to undo all her hard work though!

Chiggers Tue 19-Mar-13 21:02:42

No. Not impossible if the effort is put in. I would have been thoroughly ashamed of myself if I had visitors and my house was a tip.

I wouldn't pay a cleaner to do jobs that I can do myself, so I do a big weekly clean (hoovering, dusting, bed linen changes etc) and keep on top of it by doing the usual daily things such as cooking, dishes (no dishwasher), washing and a quick hoover over the floors. Once those are done, I will sit down and play with my kids. That way, I don't have to worry about my house being clean and tidy if visitors call unannounced.

BoulevardOfBrokenSleep Tue 19-Mar-13 21:32:48

Yeah, the usual monthly daily jobs like hoovering grin

Moving swiftly on...

Have just moved to a house with kitchen/diner, I had fond images of the DC (6 and 2) playing nicely with their toys in the dining area while I whipped up something delicious and nutritious in the kitchen, beaming at them proudly.

Turns out they'd rather hit each other with the toys and then escape somewhere else.

Yesterday the 2yo pulled over the kitchen chair the 6yo was sitting on. I don't even know how that's physically possible.

Today I burnt the casserole to cinders while trying to negotiate a compromise DVD they'd both watch.

<weeps in the corner>

Brittabot Tue 19-Mar-13 21:41:55

Chiggers what do you do with the children while you are cleaning?

Every time I try to do anything other than look after the children, one or the other or both of my children will climb, jump, wrestle, tip, push, poo, wee (toilet training) or vomit (bug) causing either more mess or attempted physical injury. I'm hoping its a phase....

AmberSocks Tue 19-Mar-13 21:43:31

Have to say its not that hard,ad i have 4 under 5!

Maybe your standards are too high?

Creameggkr Tue 19-Mar-13 22:08:33

I would have been thoroughly ashamed of myself if I had visitors and my house was a tip.
Really? Blimey! What a shame.

FreshLeticia Tue 19-Mar-13 22:22:40

I am going to be controversial here, but no, it isn't difficult to keep your house tidy. It doesn't need to be 'show home ' standard, but if it's a filthy mess then what the hell are you doing all day? Why is it so hard to wash up and put stuff away after you use it?
I have three DCs, two cats, a dog, six hens, DH, an awkward elderly mother and a full-on job and ours is pretty tidy. We have a big ( tidy) garden and fields and grow loads of veg and always cook from scratch.
I'm sorry, but I think many people are either plain lazy or spend too much time trying to entertain small children who, really need to be just left to play.
children come to live with you, so they fit into your life, not you into theirs.
Make helping you be their play. e.g. let's sort the washing, let's sweep the floors, or let's cook the dinner together. They love it and it helps them become able to look after themselves.

BoulevardOfBrokenSleep Tue 19-Mar-13 22:23:08

"Maybe your standards are too high?"

Yeah, this is very much not my problem.

I agree with Brittabot, it has always been my experience that trying to leave the kids to their own devices to do any sort of housework, only results in the creation of exponentially more work.
Leave the kids to 'play' while you do 15mins tidying? They've created at least an hour's worth of work for you. Not including cost of wallpaper stripper/carpet cleaner hire. Maybe mine are just demons.

GrendelsMum Tue 19-Mar-13 22:24:07

Not intended as a criticism of anyone here, but I think it's perfectly possible, if it's important enough to your family.

A friend's DH has a disability which means that if anything was left on the floor, he could trip and hurt himself very badly.

Their DCs have always lived in a house where putting things away tidily is a fundamental safety rule, as basic as turning the gas off after you've finished cooking. If it was a choice between leaving the house on time for school, and being late because they were putting things away safely, it would have to be putting things away safely, every time.

And the result is that the house is extremely tidy. Which means its much easier to keep clean.

BoulevardOfBrokenSleep Tue 19-Mar-13 22:26:02

"Make helping you be their play. e.g. let's sort the washing, let's sweep the floors, or let's cook the dinner together"

That holds the 2yo for about a minute; the 6yo doesn't fall for it at all.

WafflyVersatile Tue 19-Mar-13 22:34:25

My living room looks like it's suffered an explosion of toddlers but I don't have even one.

midastouch Tue 19-Mar-13 22:51:40

My house is clean and tidy from about 9.30pm when i finish cleaning and tidying to 7.30 in the morning when the kids get up, ive sort of come to terms with it now

Hippee Tue 19-Mar-13 23:04:03

noisytoys - a 7 year old and a 4 year old? If it is you, I'm so blush

noisytoys Tue 19-Mar-13 23:21:22

Not me then. I have a 2 year old and a 4 year old smile

freddiefrog Tue 19-Mar-13 23:23:37

I manage a clean and tidy house from about 10am once I've tidied it up, until about 3:35pm when when kids come home from school.

Then my artfully arranged cushions get chucked on the floor, my newly hoovered carpets get liberally sprinkled with biscuit crumbs, and all the crap I've shoved in a cupboard put away gets dragged back out again.

ceeveebee Tue 19-Mar-13 23:44:25

It's perfectly possible - I have 16 mo twins and house is tidy by 6 pm every day - it's a total shit tip during the daytime but always have a whiz round before bathtime so it's tidy when I come back down stairs. All toys chucked in a box, all dishes in dishwasher and kitchen floor swept - takes 2 minutes. Handheld Hoover helps too. And cbeebies for 10 minutes after every meal while I wipe up the carnage

INeverSaidThat Tue 19-Mar-13 23:57:32

I lived in Canada in a house with a huge basement so most of the kids crap toys were down there while the rest of the house mostly looked tidy. The house also had loads of storage which made things a million times easier.

It is hard to keep things tidy if there is nowhere to store things

<<stating the bleedin' obvious emoticon>>

I work full time and DH is a SAHD. We have 4 year old twins and a 17 month old.

The house is still a shit tip.

So, in conclusion, YADNBU.

Things are slightly better since we bought massive PAX wardrobes from Ikea for all the toys. At least they are corralled now!

FreshLeticia Wed 20-Mar-13 08:34:30

You see it all comes down to the fact that you untidy lot allow your children to wreck wallpaper and carpets and throw stuff around. Put your foot down ffs.
As for getting them to help you, don't allow them to say no. They are children, they should not be allowed to ignore adults.
No wonder this country is so entitled, our children are being brought up to think that they can just do what they like.
And pick your battles - they can make as much mess as they like in their own bedrooms and you just close the door.

Chiggers Wed 20-Mar-13 08:34:41

Yep. I would be thoroughly ashamed of a house that looked a tip. I feel it say to visitors that I was a lazy mare and CBA to tidy and clean even though I would have had plenty of time to do it AND play with the kids.

The world didn't revolve around me or my DC and housework would still need done, so I just got on with it and the DC had to accept that ther would be times when I had to do housework, They just played by themselves or with each other and had great fun bonding as siblings, even though they fight like cat and dog grin.

I feel unnerved, agitated and uncomfortable if my house was looking like a tip.

Creameggkr Wed 20-Mar-13 08:41:40

Gosh! Is that really how you value yourself?
If my home was a tip It would be because my entire family had made a mess and I don't see that as my sole responsibility to clear up and I certainly wouldn't feel any shame
Life is too short.

JesusInTheCabbageVan Wed 20-Mar-13 08:48:09

I''m taking advantage of a strike day to get the hoovering done. It's soul-destroying, hauling our dying, protesting hulk of a Dyson around just knowing that as soon as DH and DS get home, the kitchen will again be knee deep in crumbs, chewed food, socks and dog-hair tumbleweeds.

Also depressing is when your small child becomes mobile and you're brought down to their eye-level - like if they trasported Honey I Shrunk the Kids to one of the Grimefighters houses.

Creameggkr Wed 20-Mar-13 08:52:48

The thing is I've got big age gaps so I remember after my three boys went to school I did go back to having a nice clean tidy home.
So now I e got the dds and work part time if much rather spend time with them as I know how quickly it goes.
Today it's my day off so its a quick tidy then toddlers then lunch and short nap during which ill prepare dinner then we have music,school pick up and dancing.
So not masses of time for housework but a fun day.
Can't have it all.

AmberSocks Wed 20-Mar-13 09:20:21

we have laminate floors and leather sofas and wipeable paint,that saves a lot of work,until a year ago we had cream sofas and carpet and expensive wallpaper,it got wrecked pretty soon and the house stank from potty training accidents and the cats deciding to piss everywhere for some reason.much easier now.

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