Would you give directions to someone in a car?

(115 Posts)
kim147 Tue 19-Mar-13 11:33:09

Petrol station on way to an appointment was shut yesterday afternoon so I drove to the next town thinking there's be a garage. Saw someone walking her dog so I pulled over, opened window and smiled nicely with an "excuse me, please". She looked at me and then carried on walking.

Luckily someone a bit further up the road was more helpful.

I'm sure I seemed friendly when I said "excuse me"

seeker Wed 20-Mar-13 08:31:02

Well, unless you live in Columbia..........

gazzalw Wed 20-Mar-13 08:38:49

Well not everyone is going to be a threat - probably single men in cars are more so to a lone female (or with young children) than families or female drivers.

Whenshewasbad..... similar thing happened to DW when she was a teen on day-trip to France with school. Apparently a young, quite handsome French guy went round the town asking all the girls directions! He must have masturbated in front of almost the entire year group hmm. They just thought it hilarious...

littlepeas Wed 20-Mar-13 08:45:51

I have also been flashed by a man who stopped and asked me for directions! It was horrible actually - as soon as I noticed I walked away and he drove on and stopped further up the road, so I crossed over and he turned round. A police car drive past at that point and he then drove up, but I was haunted by all sorts of horrible thoughts about what he was planning!

So I would be very cautious about giving someone directions.

VerySmallSqueak Wed 20-Mar-13 08:57:10

I was actually attacked by a man who stopped (although he didn't ask directions - he just was fiddling with his car) and once I had passed he hid further up the road.
He then jumped out and grabbed me.

If i am alone on a quiet road I have to say my heart does thump a bit faster if a car stops near me.

I will still give directions as I've experienced no problems doing that as such (no one has reached out and try to pull me into the car),but I do understand people's fear.

RooneyMara Wed 20-Mar-13 08:57:28

unless you live in Columbia, or Australia, or anywhere that cars exist, or people who want to do random dreadful things to strangers.

I accept it's not an everyday occurrence but it does happen.

I still give directions though.

gazzalw Wed 20-Mar-13 09:02:39

There seem to have been quite a few nasty incidents reported by Mumsnetters on this thread sad which perhaps suggests that the problem is more widespread than one might think.

I think you make judgement calls about these things. DW is always happy to give directions if it's daylight and it's on a relatively busy road, but she's quite intuitive so think she would know when to stop and be helpful or just walk on. She certainly wouldn't do so, of a dark evening, walking down a side road on her own.

How horrible for you, VerySmallSqueak....

VerySmallSqueak Wed 20-Mar-13 09:04:42

It was a long long time ago gazzalw but you never forget these things.

exoticfruits Wed 20-Mar-13 09:06:42

People don't seem to have the ability to risk assess. A woman, in a car alone, in the afternoon, in a town is not a risk-especially if you have your dog with you.

TooYappy Wed 20-Mar-13 09:11:57

I don't anymore as there are too many new houses and estates here I get them mixed up, an ambulance asked me once and I was just too confused.

I do stop the car and ask people myself though, if I am somewhere I don't know.

WorraLiberty Wed 20-Mar-13 09:12:11

Worra, is it terrible that I find it hilarious (in a way) that he had to point it out?

No, I found it hilarious too - as did the Policewoman I reported it to.

She said, "Well that's ruined his day, hasn't it?" grin

thegreylady Wed 20-Mar-13 09:15:40

The only time I saw a flasher it was on the canal towpath in Skipton. I was walking my daft Labrador off the lead so not obviously with me iykwim. She jumped up and licked his willy!!
He actually ran down the path with her lolloping after him jumping up as he tried to put it away!

RobinSparkles Wed 20-Mar-13 09:46:12

When I was about 19 (and very very stupid) I was on my way to University when a woman stopped her car and asked directions to the building that I was on my way to. I told her that I was on my way there so she said, "ooh, hop in. I'll give you a lift!" So I did blush.

Luckily, she was lovely and had no sinister motives but I cringe when I think about it now. She could have been anybody.

It was a very rough area and a known route for students to take to Uni. Anyone could have pretended to be on their way to Blab Blah Building in order to capture a naive student. On the other hand she was silly too - she could have been letting a murderer or robber into her car!

limitedperiodonly Wed 20-Mar-13 09:54:50

I don't think you were that stupid robin.

Yes, she could have been Myra Hindley or Rose West, luring victims for her husband. But she wasn't. She was lost and you got a lift out of a rough area.

We did recently have emails from the school that at least one bloke in a car (description given) was stopping girls going home from DD's secondary on the pretext of asking directions and exposing himself while still sat in the car. (Think it was one bloke.)

School gave advice to girls to walk together as much as possible, etc, and if they did get stopped by bloke, to try and remember the licence plate. I think some of the boys walked with the girls too, as a bigger group might persuade bloke not to stop them.

I think he has been arrested. Apparently he wasn't that old either from the descriptions they already had.

Worra You should have just said "What a silliy little thing!" in your best brisk voice to your wanker grin That would really have ruined his day.....

Tanith Wed 20-Mar-13 10:21:18

Many years ago, I was walking to work along a major road in Reading when a man in a van pulled up in a lay-by to ask directions. I told him and got a bit worried when he carried on talking so I backed off a bit. Then he opened the door and grabbed hold of me to pull me in.

I was extremely lucky that a passing lorry driver had seen and sounded his horn. Van driver leapt back in, and drove off as quick as he could.

I did report it, but was so shaken up I couldn't tell them much and I never heard any more about it.

Catchingmockingbirds Wed 20-Mar-13 11:40:59

When I was a teenager my friend was walking home after spending the day with me and someone stopped her for directions. It turned out there was more than one person but they were hiding in the back and they then tried to drag her into the car. Luckily she kicked and screamed and managed to get away, but it's made me wary ever since.

TooYappy Wed 20-Mar-13 12:09:24

I have been ignored before but it has taken me to read this to realise, I now see my chasing people for directions it's possibly not acceptable and these people are quite clearly ignoring me and have not, 'just not heard me' as I have always thought.

They always answer when I follow them though. blush

I will stop it now.

BuddyButters Wed 20-Mar-13 12:17:43

I never do, but only because I've got no sense of direction.

Unless they wanted directions to my house.

If they wanted directions to anywhere else they'd end up in Scarborough. Unless they wanted directions to Scarborough. In which case they'd probably end up at my house.

Molehillmountain Wed 20-Mar-13 12:31:23

I try not to-my directions are so rubbish they'd probably get lost! These days I'd look it up on my phone though.

FloraFox Wed 20-Mar-13 16:48:31

Someone tried to ask me for directions when I was taking cash out of a machine in central London. Then she started spouting how rude I was when I ignored her.

I have told my children to be very wary of both men and women strangers. The risk of being abducted is highly unlikely but the consequences if it happens are huge. The risk of giving offence is more likely but the consequences are trivial. That's how I teach them to risk assess.

grimbletart Wed 20-Mar-13 17:00:58

Years ago I was hurrying along Euston Road to catch the last train, red hot coffee in hand. Guy stopped to ask directions he was having a wank:
not a good idea to do that to a woman carrying a hot coffee......

kim147 Wed 20-Mar-13 17:03:31

Please tell me you did something with the coffee smile

There's a lot of weird blokes out there.

limitedperiodonly Wed 20-Mar-13 17:43:11

A black cab driver stopped to tell me I had nice legs. I wasn't looking for a cab but if I was it didn't make me want to hop in.

That's what I mean about having your wits about you. Other than that, you just have to trust and the idea that you're some kind of supersleuth is ridiculous and insulting.

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