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to ask how you juggle schools/childcare if you have a high powered/busy job?

(82 Posts)
suebfg Mon 18-Mar-13 21:22:48

I work part time at the moment but may have to go full time soon. DH's job often takes him away from home and I don't know how we'd cope with the school runs if we were both working full time (other than having DS in breakfast and after school club every day of the week).

How do you cope? I have no family locally to help out sad

suebfg Mon 18-Mar-13 21:50:54

It isn't a problem at the moment but I need to find another job and am struggling to find part-time work.

KarlosKKrinkelbeim Mon 18-Mar-13 21:55:30

artichook, can i ask you, when you switch to an au pair what will you do for school hols? Take time off, or increase au pair's pay to reflect increased responsibilities?

williaminajetfighter Mon 18-Mar-13 21:57:03

Like others breakfast and after school club every day. I have to leave work at 5 to pick up by 545 then home, dinner, homework, bed and then I usually work from 830 to 1130pm at home to make up the hours.

To be fair after years of working like this I'm getting quite sick of it as its exhausting.

Sometimes it's hard not to growl at the SAHMs dropping their kids at school then heading out to the gym while I'm racing to work. Guess I should have done an MRS degree.

thegraduand Mon 18-Mar-13 21:58:13

DH and I both work full time, DD is 4. The key is sharing responsibility, shared calendar we can access from iphones, laptops etc, everything outside normal working hours (working late, work trips, nights out) have to go on there. Share nursery pick up and drop off, I get into work early and leave early, DH does the opposite. Parents are willing to help when we are desperate, but they are a 3hr drive away. Understanding bosses helps, as does working at home some days and evenings. And don't try and do much else, we don't get to the gym etc.

happyfrogger Mon 18-Mar-13 21:59:44

DD has just started nursery, she is 11 mo. I bfeed her at 6.30am and hand her over to DH, then I leave home at 7am and get to work at 8am. DH drops her at nursery at 845 and he gets to work at 930. I leave work at 4pm and pick DD up at 5pm. I still feel ridiculous guilt that her day in nursery is pretty long when she's so tiny.

We are home by 5.10 for playtime, supper, bath and bed at 6.45pm.

I have no idea how I'll cope when she's at school. I thought it was hard enough now but I'm dreading the guilt and juggling in a few years. I don't have a 'high flying' career but it is reasonable and comfortably paid and simply wouldn't exist as a part time job. We would be financially crippled if I didn't work. What I would for a nice little local job, 4 days a week finishing at 3pm with a lovely salary to boot!

Feeing your pain, OP.

Portofino Mon 18-Mar-13 22:01:57

My routine is Similar to that of Nevergoogle. Though I get up earlier envy

suebfg Mon 18-Mar-13 22:03:06

Yes, I have to get up a 5.30 to get us both out of the door and DS at breakfast club by 7.30!

nevergoogle Mon 18-Mar-13 22:04:04

i should get up earlier. the list i've given doesn't include all the shouting.

noviceoftheday Mon 18-Mar-13 22:06:12

We have a nanny but with young dcs. When both dcs are at school we plan to switch to an au pair.

ijustwant8hours Mon 18-Mar-13 22:07:58

Nanny is the only real answer. I had a career type job, I negotiated part time hours and was on the verge of employing my nanny full time so I could manage to work part time! The people I know who do it have very flexible nannys who will swop days / work evenings etc. flexibility is the key IMO

MichaelaS Mon 18-Mar-13 22:09:01

1) breakfast club and after school nanny
2) au pair
3) second wife!!! Or second husband. Not something I often advocate but these days the cost of childcare would be much easier when bourne by 3 working adults, or 2 working adults and 1 SAHP!

suebfg Mon 18-Mar-13 22:10:18

grin re number 3

livinginwonderland Mon 18-Mar-13 22:11:46

i was in school 8am-6pm in breakfast clubs and after school clubs between the ages of 5-15 or so, then after that i made my way home earlier through lifts from friends/boarders bus at school. i survived. during the holiday i was witha childminder or a stayed with friends occasionally.

nosleeps Mon 18-Mar-13 22:12:04

Ours is similar to happyfrogger, am desperately trying to find help for pickups, as I should really be doing more hours.
It's always a rush and we're always tired, but couldn't afford to live without us both working.

missorinoco Mon 18-Mar-13 22:21:24

I don't work full time, but have wrap around child care on the days I work. I have an excellent childminder, and my pre schoolers are in nursery still, but it's a headache. If I could afford it I would have a nanny.

I think that not so much for the pre/after school care, which is part of the equation, but more for the sick child days and the bad weather days when you aren't sure you can get yourself into work, and having to factor the children in is another stress again.

Also envious of Nevergoogle and 7.30. I brought forward my getting up from 6.30 to 6.15 to reduce the shouting, it has sort of worked.

MrsSchadenfreude Mon 18-Mar-13 22:32:37

Au pair or nanny is easier than after school club - with after school club, you need a contingency plan if there is a crash on the motorway or someone has stolen the wiring from the railway again and you are stuck at Watford for hours. We paid our au pair a bit extra for the holidays, and also paid for her flight and visa (and gave her 4 weeks extra paid leave and spending money) to Vancouver to see her sister, whom she hadn't seen for 8 years.

I work 3 days and my DC used the Breakfast Club/ After School Club.

Only drawback I find- it's in the Infants school so if they have an inset day or something like Open Day, Fayres, Bouncy Castle Day then the Club is closed.
Though they let us know the dates a the start of the year, I have to work round these days.

ChestyLeRoux Tue 19-Mar-13 06:37:23

I get up at 6.30 do the whole lot entirely myself and do 2 settings on foot. Do everything in between and both bedtime routines. I also work with one of my children. So got the whole sahm, wohm thing all on my own most days with no help or transport. I get less than £7 an hour for it and Im in a management role.

LisasCat Tue 19-Mar-13 06:48:49

I'm about to go full time as well. At present I use after school club but I'm switching to a childminder. Our ASC finishes at 5.30 and woe betide you if you're 30 seconds late. Whereas the childminder has said we'll contract to 5.30 then if I'm late she'll charge for an extra 15 mins.
And can I quickly derail the thread to say bastard Tories! They finally implement a good policy (20% discount on childcare when both parents work), but it will come into effect the day my youngest starts school. Aaaaaaaargh!

cleofatra Tue 19-Mar-13 06:55:32

To be honest, the higher up the tree I got, the easier child care became.
I can now "call the shots" and also work as a freelance consultant for almost 100 x the hourly rate I was on when employed.

2fedup Tue 19-Mar-13 07:05:48

We use a breakfast club and a childminder. As she lives next to the school, DS gets to go to after school clubs and she will pick him up from there. I'm grateful she does this as it allows DS to join sports training etc ,which he wants to as he is older.
I would recommend you ask around and recommendations as you may be able to find something similar.

scottishmummy France Tue 19-Mar-13 07:05:56

If you both work ft you accept this stretches kids day.this isn't necessarily bad
It's worth the effort the gain is financial,career and kids know their routine
You need to lose the sadface guilt and just get on with it

cleofatra Tue 19-Mar-13 07:28:09

You may be surprised by your DC.
I once considered reducing my hours and, therefore, wage in an effort to spend more time with my ds. I decided to tell him, with the idea that he would be thrilled. I said that we would have a little less money to spend so may have fewer holidays and outings etc but that Mum would have loads more time to spend on him, including him being picked up from school.
His reply was "Oh, no,don't do that Mum." I'd rather have the extra pennies to spend".
I tried not to take it personally.

scottishmummy France Tue 19-Mar-13 07:35:59

Tbh,majority adults work. kids cope with working parents and associated routine,does no harm
Do dads handwring and fret?probably not.no woman should berate self with guilt
If your arrangements are safe and adequate your kids will be fine

WaxyBean Tue 19-Mar-13 07:48:09

I work 3 days a week.

Weds:
Up at 5.45 (children normally up around then, but need to actually get up and get ready then)
Leave house at 6.30
At desk by 7.15
Work like buggery until 4 (work through lunch break)
Home by 5pm - children dropped off by childminder
7pm children in bed
8pm all chores done, log on to work remotely and work until 10pm when I go to bed

Thurs and Fri (HB does Weds routine)
Up at 5.45
Leave house with children fully ready at 7.15
Public transport to childminders, drop them off at 7.45
Arrive at work at 8.45
Work like buggery until 6pm
Get home at 7pm
Breastfeed 13m old
8pm chores all done, log on to work remotely until 10pm when I go to bed

All other times - grab whatever dead time I can to check blackberry and reply to emails (e.g. in soft play, while rocking baby to sleep, on public transport - multitasking at its best).r

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