Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

1 2

AIBU?

aibu or is sil regarding watching children (sorry is long)

27 replies

dementedmumof6 · 22/02/2013 21:03

My husband and I have recently seperated, however we had agreed to attend a charity function alongside sil and bil before we seperated that we don't want to pull out as lots of people already have.

However we hadn't discussed childcare for the night and as is local to house was thinking of making sure youngest 2 were in bed before leaving and have my eldest babysit, the 2 middle children would be staying with friends.
Now this is were i'm sure i'm not BU but don't know.

My SILs children were at my house seeing their cousins and having dinner tonight when the youngest announced they were staying here next week as MY mum was watching them while their parents were at charity night.
My mum would have them if asked but i think why should she have to watch them especially when they haven't even asked they have just assumed and they will get a child free night, whereas even if my mum does have them i will still have to come home to them and get up if anyone wakes during the night .

So would i be unreasonable to pretend i didn't hear what was said, or should i tell them i'm not happy with that they should sort their own childcare out.

OP posts:

Report

Tee2072 · 22/02/2013 21:05

Sorry, I cannot follow that. Your mum is having your SIL's children but not yours? Is that it?

TeeBee · 22/02/2013 21:06

Sorry, I'm confused too.

dementedmumof6 · 22/02/2013 21:08

No sorry she would be having my children at my house but sil has told her children that they are staying here also, although she hasnt mentioned this to me only found out when dn told my dd.

OP posts:

Fleecyslippers · 22/02/2013 21:08

So your SIL has assumed she's going to bring her kids to your house and your mum is looking after them all ? And SIL and BIL will leave them at your house overnight? And have a nice lie in next day?
YANBU!

TotallyEggFlipped · 22/02/2013 21:09

Make SIL collect her own children at the end of the night.

dementedmumof6 · 22/02/2013 21:10

Yeah thats pretty much it fleecy.

OP posts:

HeadfirstForHalos · 22/02/2013 21:12

Make sure she collects her dc at the end of the night!

TeeBee · 22/02/2013 21:12

Oh, I thought your eldest child was watching the youngest two. I would ignore it. If they mention anything just say you feel uncomfortable asking your mother to watch more than two children. What did your SIL say when the youngest piped up with that?

Tee2072 · 22/02/2013 21:12

Okay, now I get it!

Yes, call SIL and say 'No, they're not staying here all night. Come get them!' And mean it.

That's pretty cheeky!

HeadfirstForHalos · 22/02/2013 21:13

Hang on, I thought your eldest dc was babysitting yours, not your mum?

CloudsAndTrees · 22/02/2013 21:15

This is confusing!

Is your oldest babysitting or have you asked your Mum? Could your SIL have asked your Mum directly?

dementedmumof6 · 22/02/2013 21:17

I had intended for my eldest to watch them however if he has plans or doesn't want to then my mum will come and watch them if asked . However not keen on saying can you watch my children (your grankids) plus 3 others that barely know you as are only related through marriage.

OP posts:

CloudsAndTrees · 22/02/2013 21:18

Would your husband have offered your mums babysitting services without asking?

aufaniae · 22/02/2013 21:18

Is it possible your husband has told them they can stay?

DinglebertWangledack · 22/02/2013 21:19

Tell your SIL to do a bunk with that one, assuming makes an ass etc!

aufaniae · 22/02/2013 21:19

Cross posts!

Fleecyslippers · 22/02/2013 21:21

Cheeky cow - I had assumed that your SIL was your brothers wife!

gemma4d · 22/02/2013 21:22

errr.. you haven't asked your mum. SIL maybe has asked your mum, and made arrangements for your mum to have SIL-kids at SILs house?

I'm confused.

FeistyLass · 22/02/2013 21:23

I think it would be a bit unreasonable to pretend you didn't hear but YANBU to say you don't want to ask your mum to watch SIL's children. Have you asked your ex-dh about it? Maybe he told your SIL it was ok. . .

It seems like a misunderstanding so if I were you, I'd try to clarify it as soon as possible so your SIL can find alternative childcare.

MerylStrop · 22/02/2013 21:24

I think you might find that your mum has other plans which is why your children are all going on sleepovers to schoolfriends' houses.

dementedmumof6 · 22/02/2013 21:26

My sil is my exhusbands sister, there is no way he would have asked my mum especially since we have seperated, if he had my mum would have been straight on the phone asking why she was watching sil kid and not mine as she loves having mine but doesnt get to see them as often as she likes as stays a distance away.

OP posts:

HeadfirstForHalos · 22/02/2013 21:26

So your mum isn't the sil's grandmother?

It's a plain NO!

Tell her your mum isn't even babysitting so she will have to make other plans. Cheeky so and so!

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Email address

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

HeadfirstForHalos · 22/02/2013 21:27

Sorry, the sil's childrens grandmother. i too had assumed she was your brother's wife.

NatashaBee · 22/02/2013 21:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Patchouli · 22/02/2013 21:57

You might want to let your SIL know that your mum's not babysitting that night. Say there seems to have been some sort of misunderstanding.
And you can't expect your oldest to mind the cousins as well.

Flip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.