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To have chosen not to wear wedding rings when married?

(43 Posts)
Cornflowerdreams Sun 17-Feb-13 13:44:40

My husband and I got married a few years ago without doing the ring thing. Neither of us wanted to wear rings ever, as we both hate jewellery on our hands, and to us the meaning of ring wearing is not important in the least.

We love each other, have been together for 15 years and have two beautiful children.

Sometimes I get paranoid and get the impression people might think we don't wear rings because we want to send the message to the world that we are available or that we are not committed enough.

The only message we intended to send to society is that we just don't care about the ring's significance, we care deeply about our relationship.

I have even been called "weird" for doing that by an old acquaintance. Shall we try to comform to society rules?

TheVermiciousKnid Sun 17-Feb-13 13:46:36

Neither of us wear wedding rings, never have done. I really don't care what others think about that! Do what you're happy with. smile

Pandemoniaa Sun 17-Feb-13 13:47:22

Do what suits you. Who cares what "society" thinks? Although it has to be said that I don't think there are any rules anyway. Status is not determined by wearing a ring.

SirBoobAlot Sun 17-Feb-13 13:48:22

Why bother conforming? If you are both happy with it, then that's enough.

Cornflowerdreams Sun 17-Feb-13 13:48:28

Great to hear we're not the only ones! Never met a married non ring wearer in real life smile Only those with serious marital problems

noisytoys Sun 17-Feb-13 13:48:41

My parents don't wear a wedding ring. It doesn't make them any less married

Tasmania Sun 17-Feb-13 13:49:03

I don't wear my rings much (engagement and wedding ring) - despite them being super nice (with the engagement ring particularly attracting attention). I wear them when we're out and I have to look nice, but not on an everyday basis. My job is also male-dominated, and wearing them often signals to people that I'm half-retired from my career.

DH wears his every day. blush

ProfYaffle Sun 17-Feb-13 13:49:09

Why would you want to do that?! You could be describing dh and I, we've been together a similar time and don't wear rings for the same reason. I thought I would want to wear my rings but it turns out they just annoy me so I leave them at home.

No-one's ever commented but people generally assume we're not married which is understandable. It's no skin off my nose whether they think we're married or not, doesn't make any practical difference I can think of.

I have friends that are gardeners (married) and the dh wears a ring on a leather cord round his neck and she has a beautiful bracelet as neither of them wear rings.

Of course do what you want, I'd be surprised if anyone noticed.

I wear mine, but DH doesn't wear his. It's too big and we keep forgetting to get it re-sized and it kept falling off.

My parents have been married nearly 50 years and they've never worn theirs as long as I can remember. It's up to you at the end of the day.

Bunbaker Sun 17-Feb-13 13:51:41

Do what you feel comfortable with. Just bear in mind that whenever you do anything that doesn't conform to society's expectations that you might have to do a little bit of explaining now and again.

I don't do "finger furniture" either, except for my wedding ring. I don't have an engagement ring because I just don't like them and think they are a massive waste of money. As for eternity rings - don't even go there.

specialsubject Sun 17-Feb-13 13:56:58

paranoia is a mental condition. This is a question about jewellery.

I think you'll find that most of society neither notices nor cares. The person who said 'weird', is. What a strange comment.

SashaSashays Sun 17-Feb-13 13:59:15

I only look for a ring if I'm trying to work out if someone is married. I don't think it signifies anything about the relationship if they don't wear one and I think on the elderly or very traditional would take this view.

I wear a wedding ring everyday and quite often my engagement ring, but then I also wear a ring on nearly every finger so they are barely noticeable. My DH doesn't own or wear a ring, he doesn't like them, he does however have my name tattooed on him.

Pandemoniaa Sun 17-Feb-13 14:00:31

Never met a married non ring wearer in real life. Only those with serious marital problems

What a strange generalisation.

I've never been married to a man who wore a wedding ring. The fact that I am now divorced has nothing to do with their decision not to wear a wedding ring either. My DP, for instance, simply doesn't like wearing any jewellery. I'm not at all fussed about conventional wedding rings either. None of this makes us or me any less committed to our relationship.

N0tinmylife Sun 17-Feb-13 14:04:12

It is only a matter for you and your DH if you want to wear a ring or not. My DH never wanted one, and has never had one.

I wore my wedding ring up until the last few months. Now I am at work, or down at the stables a lot of the time, and I worry about them getting caught on something and injuring me, so I rarely wear them. I am no less committed to my marriage! I don't think anyone has really noticed or cared, and why should they?

andubelievedthat Sun 17-Feb-13 18:28:06

my own engegement ring is a genuine Levi denim jacket ,i dont do jewellery and i could not care less re showing anyone else my "status" i will , if need be, tell them. i always wanted a jacket like the one he got for me , this i will treasure endlessly,>he wanted and got a very specific(2 him, anyway) pair of boots.

hippo123 Sun 17-Feb-13 18:33:30

I wear a wedding ring as I like to, dh doesn't like to so he doesn't. it suits us fine and I have no issue with it, plenty of other people do though.

BlatantLies Sun 17-Feb-13 18:36:58

I don't think anyone cares. I am not even sure what finger my wedding ring is meant to be on.

StrawberryMojito Sun 17-Feb-13 18:39:41

Each to their own. I wear mine during the day but take them off each night as I can't aide wearing jewellery in bed. If you are both happy, who cares about what other people think.

ClimbingPenguin Sun 17-Feb-13 18:44:29

I don't wear mine, DH does

KC225 Sun 17-Feb-13 18:56:50

Same as climbingpenuin - I don't wear mine but DH wears his.

Methe Sun 17-Feb-13 19:00:12

I wear mine. Dh doesn't wear his. I've never really given it much thought tbh..

ukatlast Sun 17-Feb-13 19:02:07

YANBU I thought we were the only ones until reading this!

mamateur Sun 17-Feb-13 19:02:55

I got married yesterday (grin). DH asked his best man if he could borrow a ring for the ceremony (he won't be wearing a ring because he doesn't like jewellery) - but his best man couldn't lend him a ring, because he himself borrowed a ring from his best man at his wedding. In the end we bought one from Argos the morning of our wedding just for symmetry really, because my mother wanted me to wear her mother's band and I had said I would.

GregBishopsBottomBitch Sun 17-Feb-13 19:03:46

Im not into jewellry at all, so its unlikely i'd wear a ring if i got married. Its just personal preference, you dont have to wear it if your choice is not too, free will and all that.

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