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. . . to feel a bit pissy about giving someone's kid a lift

(104 Posts)
spiritedaway Mon 11-Feb-13 07:48:04

I offered as they have 2 smaller kids that were out in the cold at night for a 8 o clock pick up on foot. It's not out of my way but will make things a bit more hectic than usual! Just became aware they are rather proud themselves in a hippy type way for managing without a car and actually, compared to myself, are very well off. I will still do it, and not a biggy, but do you think if people are all preachy about not having a car or the expense that goes with it, they should accept lifts ?

AThingInYourLife Mon 11-Feb-13 09:52:56

No, I get you, they're like those assholes that give up buying cigarettes.

But still fucking smoke.

And depend upon the fact that other people will still be buying them and that it is polite to offer.

I think it is extremely mean-spirited to refuse to run a car but allow other people to put themselves out to provide you with the comforts of car travel.

I walk everywhere local, and I always refuse lifts. Because I don't see why my preference for walking everywhere should mean friends have to give me lifts just because it is rainy or cold.

BelindaCarlisle Mon 11-Feb-13 09:53:57

Lol. I ain't no ginger! No I meant to merlot that they do resent it.
Calm down ! grin

spiritedaway Mon 11-Feb-13 09:54:10

Belinda, i confused you may with another post and got all pissy and twatty with you! So sorry dear..i meant Damemargot

seeker Mon 11-Feb-13 09:54:44

And it is a good idea to have fewer cars on the road. I live in the back of beyond, so I can't manage without a car, but I'm much happier if all the seats are occupied whenever possible. It reduces my carbon footprint a bit, so I feel less guilty about driving so much.

DameMargotFountain Mon 11-Feb-13 09:55:09

no-one was poncing off the OP

she offered the child (who i assume isn't old enough to have a driving licence anyhow) a lift

BelindaCarlisle Mon 11-Feb-13 09:57:01

Lol. I did wonder! weeps ;)

DameMargotFountain Mon 11-Feb-13 09:57:14

erm, ginger?

i wished, then i could be Vivienne Westwood <preens>

AThingInYourLife Mon 11-Feb-13 09:57:37

Bullshit, the parents are totally poncing that lift.

Now they don't have to pick their kid up from that activity.

A favour they know they will never pay back.

Because if their "morals" hmm

what did you offer for then? do you like feeling pissy?

Wants4 Mon 11-Feb-13 09:59:16

YANBU
You offered a lift because they mentioned younger kids were freezing being dragged out at 8 at night. You offered to help them. You presumed, as would I, that they had to forego a car due to finances.
Then they brag about being eco-friendly etc. Of course they are eco-friendly, they have sucked you (and probably others) into doing their driving for them.
Nothing against the eco-warrior. But use public transport, or walk, or arrange your activities so you don't have to drag small children out at night. Past bedtime imo.
And don't brag about being better off because of your eco-drive.

seeker Mon 11-Feb-13 09:59:53

Because it is sooo inconvenient to pick up to children rather than one....what is this with the pull up the drawbridge, I'm all right jack, look after number one attitude? It's just horrible.

spiritedaway Mon 11-Feb-13 10:01:07

Haha Belinda. . Was that get ahead? Or get head? Great plan!

valiumredhead Mon 11-Feb-13 10:01:22

It is horrible.

Yes that attitude is indeed horrible seeker.

But i'm buggered if i'm going to help out people who think they are morally superior and are looking down their noises at the specific thing I am doing to help them out. I think that attitude is just as bad, if not worse.

aldiwhore Mon 11-Feb-13 10:03:20

YABU

You offered. Simple as that. They could be the devil duo incarnate but that wouldn't be the point, you offered the lift and now you're being pissy and judgey.

DameMargotFountain Mon 11-Feb-13 10:03:40

it's a lift in the car

it's nice thing to offer, especially if it's cold/wet

no need to slag off the whole family for it

(ooo, that's like one of scottishmummys posts grin )

BelindaCarlisle Mon 11-Feb-13 10:04:00

I agree with wants.

YANBU. They're hypocrites and scroungers. If they have morals they should use them. Why can't one parent collect older child though? That would save shoes being worn so quickly and be environmentally friendly.

spiritedaway Mon 11-Feb-13 10:04:14

Ok ok! I am an unreasonably meanspirited, pissy twat!

Floggingmolly Mon 11-Feb-13 10:04:43

Did you just offer to test whether they would accept or not? hmm
I'm sure they'd find your "attitude offends" too, if they read this thread.

SignoraStronza Mon 11-Feb-13 10:05:25

When I lived abroad with my abusive ex and our dc I worked f/t in two jobs and sent dc to nursery. I did this in order to put clothes on mine and dc's back, feed us and afford the occasional trip home as the ex never shared any 'family' finances.

Ex drove around in a brand new company car and had 42k savings in his current account. I rode around on a rickety bicycle with a seat on the back to take dc to and from nursery. He was disgusted that I asked him to buy me a cheap runaround that I would tax, insure and run. I knew better than to bring it up again.

When, inevitably, it chucked it down, snowed or the bike broke, I either chucked dc in a sling and trudged home or, if I was lucky, the staff would occasionally take pity on me and offer us a lift.

Yes, I probably did appear to be a well off hippy but really hope that the lifts weren't offered begrudgingly.

BelindaCarlisle Mon 11-Feb-13 10:05:55

This is like those threads where someone criticises a friend and gets endless "some friend you are" posts.

No one can criticise anyone ever. Unless they feed the kids heroin or summat

spiritedaway Mon 11-Feb-13 10:06:46

I didn't offer begrudgingly. . Maybe i am passive aggressive? ?

drownangels Mon 11-Feb-13 10:07:57

Athinginyourliife Ok maybe they wil never repay the favour like for like but they may do a favour that is unforeseen at the moment. and then bitch about it!

Nectar Mon 11-Feb-13 10:09:10

As non-drivers ourselves by choice, my dh and I have no problems getting around by public transport, taxis, cycling and walking. We ferry our kids around to everything they want to do, and wouldn't dream of expecting others to help.

The problem we've sometimes had is when drivers offer us lifts and WILL NOT take no for an answer, so we feel rude refusing. We've also had to explain to people that our car-less situation isn't due to money problems, so a tenner on a return taxi to somewhere isn't going to break the bank for us!

Some of these people have then chosen to start criticising our situation, and going on about how they've 'saved the day' for us, by running us into town or wherever, when we'd rather have not taken the lift anyway!

This isn't ALL drivers by the way, just some. I tend to be a lot firmer now though and just keep repeating, 'No thank you, we're fine!' We just find it easier to be independent.

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