To be utterly horrified and disgusted at my brother!

(204 Posts)
FamilyTroubles Tue 05-Feb-13 13:55:55

Long story with so much background that it would be the length of War and Peace if I was to include it all! Basically my DB has been married twice and has a child to each marriage. His eldest DC lives some distance from him (think complete opposite ends of the country) involving a plane or long train journey.

He still keeps in touch with his DC1 and has her every school holiday and would be excellent at paying maintenance and would send pocket money and contribute extra towards school trips, uniforms and new shoes/clothes. However his second wife does not have a good relationship with DN and has said publicly that she feels it is disruptive for her and their child when she visits and she resents the amount money my DB contributes towards DN. MY DN1 and DN2 don't appear to have any kind of relationship and blatantly ignore each other when they are together.

So there is some background information. Cutting to last night when DN1 was admitted to hospital with a life threatening condition. She is absolutely terrified and is asking for her father (my DB). My DB is refusing to go as he has apparently no money and SIL has said she will not loan him any as she can't spare any (they have separate finances, DB pays the mortgage and bulk of household bills whilst she covers things for herself and their child). My DM has stepped in and said she will pay the airfare but DB has said that SIL is not happy for him to go and he must respect her wishes!

To say I am boiling with rage is an understatement, how anyone could treat their child inthat way at such worrying time is beyond me. Incidentally,I have taken emergency leave and got MIL to help out with my DC's so I can go tomorrow to see DN. So AIBU or should I just mind my own business?

imogengladhart Thu 07-Feb-13 09:05:15

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GilmoursPillow Thu 07-Feb-13 09:09:26

I'm glad too, it must have made such a difference to your niece, and I'm glad she's doing well too.

It sounds as if your SiL is terrified of her DH and his ex-wife meeting without her in attendance. Twat

Whitewineformeplease Fri 08-Feb-13 04:14:55

Great post Eurostar, definitely food for thought. I was just thinking that they were both a pair of twats but you could be right.

Roseformeplease Sun 10-Feb-13 23:45:21

Hope all OK, OP.

Whitewineformeplease - are you my long lost sister?

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