Ex driving the kids about without passing a test...

(85 Posts)
monstermissy Sun 03-Feb-13 08:48:53

Just a quick poll really please, exp has never passed a driving test he had some lessons around 8 years ago but none since. His gf bought a car and so he drives it with her in the passenger seat and i assume they have L plates but dont know. The kids say not. Now ive asked him to please not drive the kids about untill he has passed his test. I dont think iabu?

He has driven them every week unknown to me even in the snow the other week. My concern is hes not actually having lessons to go with this driving hes doing. He is coming to pick them up in a couple of hours and i want to bring it up but i know he will cut me dead etc (he is a EA twat if that makes a different with a massive god complex)

monster if there are no L Plates that is illegal. Is his Provisional Licence in date? Does he have insurance? So many questions. Could gf drive them, or could you drop them off?

YANBU

Of course you ANBU

Could you report it in some way? Get some guidence from non em police? I'm sure it can't be legal.

nkf Sun 03-Feb-13 08:52:18

Don't let him them go. That's for today. Tell the kids that Daddy isn't allowed to drive a car. And then report him to the relevant police department. I can't see what else you can do.

HollyBerryBush Sun 03-Feb-13 08:52:46

If the new GF is in the car, then there is no bar to him driving as she is giving him lessions.

If she isn't he's driving illegally, report him.

VBisme Sun 03-Feb-13 08:53:25

Definitely NBU, that's a really stupid thing to do.

Fairylea Sun 03-Feb-13 08:53:26

I would report him (although he will probably deny it and therefore the police wouldn't have proof).
But would give him a poke.

Awful behaviour from him, so dangerous.

AThingInYourLife Sun 03-Feb-13 08:54:04

Well if she's always in the car when he's driving, then presumably he's just like any other learner driver?

Should learners not drive children?

Euphemia Sun 03-Feb-13 08:54:08

The official advice is:

"Q: Can learner drivers carry passengers while on private practice?

A: Yes, learner drivers can carry passengers whilst on private practice, provided that the learner is being supervised by someone who is at least 21 years old, has a full, valid driving licence and has held that licence for at least 3 years. The number of passengers depends on the number of seats in the vehicle, so for a normal car, a learner can have up to 3 passengers in the rear plus the supervising driver in the front passenger seat.

However, passengers can be distracting, especially for a learner driver. So we suggest that learners do not carry passengers (except the supervising driver, of course) while practising until they, and the supervising driver, think that they have gained sufficient driving experience. If the learner is also taking professional lessons, we suggest they also ask the instructor if s/he thinks the learner is ready to take passengers.

If any of the passengers are under 12 years old or 135 cm tall, they must be carried in a suitable child seat – not just the car’s seat belt. For advice on child car seats see www.childcarseats.org.uk. Passengers over this age or height should, of course, wear seat belts."

The second paragraph is the crucial one. It sounds like he's going against safety advice, and not just having driving practice but habitually driving.

monstermissy Sun 03-Feb-13 08:56:49

he says he has L plates (not that the boys remember seeing them) the gf is in the car, so i suppose with L plates and her its technically a lesson which i know is legal but im still not happy about it. She is not a driving instructor and he isnt having any other lessons. So annoying that what i think is a basic request is completly ignored yet again.

I don't think learners should carry children unless absolutely necessary.

HollyBerryBush Sun 03-Feb-13 08:58:16

But it isn't illegal though.

No. Just not advisable. I think the GF should drive, as long as she is insured etc.

Euphemia Sun 03-Feb-13 08:59:39

You don't have to have professional lessons. But he doesn't sound like he ever plans to take a test, just drive about with her all the time.

Is she definitely always in the car?

DontmindifIdo Sun 03-Feb-13 08:59:58

well, some people never have official lessons before taking and passing their test so that shouldn'tbe a problem, but if she's in the car anyway, I'd say you aren't happy with it and you'd perfer her to drive. Make sure they have the right car seats though...

ll31 Sun 03-Feb-13 09:00:59

yabu, if gf is in car there is no issue.

If he's that good at driving he should take his test. If he's not good enough to pass his test then he needs one to one lessons not 'lessons' with distracting kids in the back.

If he has been driving around as a learner for the best part of ten years I would say there is little intention of any imminent test taking. Is his theory test booked?

Exactly Kiss

VitoCorleone Sun 03-Feb-13 09:05:24

I drove with my kids in the car before i passed my test, DP sat in with me. Its not illegal

I did have L plates on though.

Is he insured?

monstermissy Sun 03-Feb-13 09:06:34

he hasnt taken a theory test to my knowledge, he hasnt been driving for ages. He had some lessons years ago then gave up. He has only just started driving again when the gf bought the car a couple of months ago. She is always there and i dont see the problem with asking her to drive them. Another situation im not happy about but one of those ones i have no control over either i suppose...

There isnt much i can do about it is there?

SilveryMoon Sun 03-Feb-13 09:07:37

I'm a learner driver. I failed my test last month but have another booked. I drive with the children in the car. Dp is with me, I have L plates and the car is in my name and I am the named driver on the insurance.

I fully understand your concern OP, but surely this man would not put his children in the car if he wasn't completely confident that they would be safe? I know that I am more likely to f up because of lack of experience, but for where I drive I am fairly confident that we are all safe. I wouldn't drive long distances or difficult routes because I can become flustered.

MammaTJ Sun 03-Feb-13 09:07:51

I drive with my DC in the car. I only have a provisional license. My DP is well over 21 and has been driving for a very long time and he always sits beside me.

I am insured and as far as them being a distraction, I am well used to ignoring them while MNin, so continue that in the car. When they get too much, I pull up in a safe place and tell them their behaviour is putting us all at risk and why.

I don't think you are being unreasonable to question them and seek reassurance all is as it should be though.

Perhaps I should amend it to nobody should drive as a learner with my children in the car. grin They can't sit together for 5 minutes before WW3 breaks out.

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