To think that I don't actually HAVE to leap to answer my phone if I don't want to?

(98 Posts)
HecateWhoopass Fri 25-Jan-13 17:05:10

Because my husband is driving me up the bloody WALL with it.

I don't have to stop whatever I am doing and find my phone if it bleeps. It's a text. I can read it in a bit.

If I am busy and the phone goes, the person will leave a message. Or I'll check the number and if I recognise it - I'll call them back.

So why oh why does my husband leap up and pass me my bag as though the damned thing will explode if a text is not answered at once?

It's not a royal bloody command. I can get it in 5 minutes, for crying out loud.

Pavlov's ruddy dogs. That's what it is. Drives me potty.

toddlerama Tue 29-Jan-13 00:31:58

YES! I am not a phone avoider really, I just don't leap up and pounce on it. This irritates DH beyond all measure. If I answered every time it rang, I would never get anything done.

My mum gets inordinately stroptastic about it too. Leaves sighing messages on the voicemail saying 'only me'. Well that's a pointless message. I can see there's a missed call, having to go through 3's stupidly long voicemail rigmarole to hear 'only me <sigh>' is pretty annoying. Tell me why you rang or don't leave a message.

Really, I'd prefer an email but that seems a bit of a cold request to your mother...grin

serendippity Mon 28-Jan-13 14:49:49

Oh god binky me too! I have the opposite problem with dh. He never answers the sodding phone and it can take him hours to look at a txt. It drives me mad.

At present, DS (aged 9) keeps bringing my mobile to me whenever it goes off. I'm working on getting him out of the habit, but it's hard. I don't keep a permanent watch on the phone and don't understand those who do.

atthewelles Mon 28-Jan-13 14:46:22

YANBU.

Slightly OT but it also drives me mad when people withhold their number (unless there's a very good reason). If I'm busy I like to know who's ringing me so I can decide whether or not I have the time to answer eg if it's my mum I will always answer as she lives alone and might need something; if it's a friend who I know is probably ringing for a chat I will ignore and call them back.

WadingThroughTreacle Mon 28-Jan-13 14:39:55

I truly thought I was the only phone avoider. Now I don't feel so guilty! I come from a family of phone avoiders, it's in my genes. My phone avoidance peaked when I had my first baby and mil seemed to feel it was necessary to call me every day (never having done so for the 13 odd years I knew her before!!)

Goldmandra Mon 28-Jan-13 14:38:09

"That is weird!"

Yep.

He is a slave to his phone and cannot see why I won't do the same smile

My children have ASD. I wonder where it came from? grin

Thewhingingdefective Mon 28-Jan-13 14:36:36

YANBU. I hate answering the phone and always leave the answer phone to pick up.

bran Mon 28-Jan-13 14:22:53

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

diddl Mon 28-Jan-13 14:15:11

Goldmandra-your husband gets angry when you don´t answer your phone?

Why?

That is weird!

I'm the same. I won't answer the landline because I don't like not knowing who is on the other end and, having never given out the number, I know it's not for me anyway.

Same with the door. If I'm not expecting a parcel and it's not time for the post to be delivered, I don't want to answer it. I don't know anyone around here anyway, so I know it won't be someone who wants to see me, and if it was someone who wanted to pop round then they should have arranged it first.

Antisocial and proud.

diddl Mon 28-Jan-13 13:57:29

The last time I used my mobile was December when I went to UK to visit my Dad.

It has been put away & will stay there until I go to UK again-maybe Easter.

Husband & daughter never have their mobiles on in the house.

There´s no need-we have a landline.

Spero Mon 28-Jan-13 13:51:00

phone avoiders are terrible timekeepers?

I am honestly surprised at that. I avoid the phone because I am such an excellent timekeeper. I know I have X amount of time to do something and breaking off in the middle to answer phone is going to bugger up a carefully planned timetable.

I am never late unless it is beyond my control, sheep on the line etc, etc.

I don't think my time is MORE important than anyone elses, I think it is of equal value. Therefore I don't rush to a ringing phone unless I have the time or inclination for a chat.

LaQueen Mon 28-Jan-13 13:28:59

YANBU.

Few people have my mobile number. I sometimes have it switched off shock I dislike text messages...

But, then I find mobiles incredibly intrusive, anyway and only carry one since having the DDs [grumpy]

Goldmandra Mon 28-Jan-13 13:16:26

I've got an app especially for making groups of people from my contacts, who then get sent to voicemail. Well, I can switch their banishment on and off. But it's usually on. I love it.

I want one!!!!

My mother used to call me every morning at 8.35. That was the time I left to drop off at school. I started answering and explaining that I was just off to school but she carried on. In the end when the phone rang just as we were leaving DD2 would look at me, roll her eyes and sigh "Granny" grin

My DH gets really angry if I don't answer my phone and I do the same walk around the house as three different phones ring and go to voicemail before I get to them angry He then makes assinine comments like "It's called a mobile phone because you can take it with you!!!!"

He also passes me my phone every time it rings or a text arrives and cannot leave the landline to ring during a meal. He only ever made the mistake of bringing it to me in the bath once though!

My family have all now learned that if I ignore the phone it is not because I cannot hear it and telling me it is ringing does not spur me into action. Having said that our washing machine and tumble dryer beep when they have finished and the dog sits and stares at me whimpering until I go and deal with it.

SanityClause Mon 28-Jan-13 12:52:59

Ten years ago, someone would write a letter to us at work, and we would receive it the next day, and write back, and they might be lucky to receive a response two days after they originally wrote, more likely 3 or 4.

Now, they will email, and expect a response in 10 minutes.

PITA.

HecateWhoopass Mon 28-Jan-13 12:49:43

grin I am an excellent time keeper.

Probably because I don't get distracted by phone calls or getting into a text exchange when I am in the middle of something else wink

TabbyM Mon 28-Jan-13 12:44:19

I screen calls as I have to answer phones all day at work - I'm not up for sales calls or no number calls in my own time but I will answer to family or friends. Nobody rings landline except sales calls anyway... Interesting stuff usually text or e-mail

VikingLady Mon 28-Jan-13 11:48:58

Trills The phone works for you, you do not work for the phone.

I have to remember that!

I do not answer the door unless I am expecting a parcel and I see the postman coming up the path (can see from the living room window). No-one else unless it is prearranged. Everyone knows this now, though PIL took some training! I just got fed up of being pestered and angry all day as I work from home. Plus we got a lot of hassle in a previous house from asbo neighbours, so I get nervous answering the door to strangers.

My mobile is on silent or vibrate, somewhere I can see it. If I know your number, have the time and am interested I will answer. Otherwise leave a voicemail. I assume texts are non-urgent, otherwise they would call! I usedto leave my mobile at home when I went out but since DM had a fall, breaking her arm and lying on the bathroom floor soggy, starkers, freezing and in shock a couple of years ago I check voicemails a bit quicker now!

Trills Mon 28-Jan-13 10:12:54

If we are talking about "valuing people's time" - I think that everyone's time is important which is why I prefer to use asynchronous forms of communication. That way everyone can deal with things at a time that is convenient to them.

Trills Mon 28-Jan-13 10:08:33

What does answering the phone have to do with timekeeping?

Branleuse Mon 28-Jan-13 10:01:12

i only answer my phone if i really feel like talking. Otherwise i ignore it

LexiLoganberryBump Mon 28-Jan-13 09:55:24

I'm not a bad time keeper, I don't answer the phone because I'm either busy or don't want to talk to someone.

I don't think that my time is more important than anyone elses but I don't think the callers time is more important either.

EndoplasmicReticulum Sun 27-Jan-13 10:44:04

I'm an excellent time keeper. I just don't like mobile phones. Ring me on the landline and I will answer straight away. Send me an email and I'll get back to you within a few hours.

SJisontheway Sun 27-Jan-13 09:23:14

Wow - so many phone avoiders. Thinking
about it, my friends can be divided into two categories - phone avoiders who never answer the phone and will call you back when they see fit, often a few days later.
The phone answerers answer the majority of the time, unless they are in the middle of something important, but will call you back, usually within a few hours.
Thinking a bit more about it, the phone avoiders are also terrible time keepers. They seem to believe their time is more important than anyone else's.

MousyMouse Sun 27-Jan-13 08:56:00

yanbu
my parent are like that. they fish out my ringing phone, giving it to me nearly dropping it as they get in a right panic that I might not answer in time.
I'm with the op. I don't answer if I don't want to and call/text back when it suits me.

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