To not appreciate the way the dentist spoke to me?

(59 Posts)
littlemisssunny Thu 24-Jan-13 12:24:59

I do have pmt at the moment so it might be me who is being unreasonable!

I changed to an nhs dentist last year, and the dentist I saw was lovely, talked things through etc. I had a temporary crown in December and booked an appt for jan to have the crown fitted.

I had to rearrange twice as I had flu and then vertigo (rang up in time and explained, no problem) then I rang on the day of my next appt to check the time as I hadn't had a text reminder, to be told the new dentist (same surgery, but dentist i saw first time had left) doesn't work that day and I should of had a letter to arrange, so I just rebooked, a bit annoyed but didn't complain as I get nervous about the dentist and was glad to get out of it!!

Anyway I went today and told them I hadn't been brushing my teeth as much as I should as I was laid up with flu and vertigo and struggled to get up to even go to the toilet.

She had a right go at me when she had finished saying I need to brush my teeth even when I'm ill otherwise I could get gum disease. It wasn't what she said it was the way she said it. I know I need to brush my teeth and again explained why I hadn't.

I left then as I didn't want to say anything as I was upset.

I have to go back for a filling in a couple of weeks and an dreading it already. The dental nurse was lovely and I think a bit embarassed for me.

I am thinking about asking to change dentists after my filling as they have lots there.

So do I need to get a grip or was she being unreasonable?

DressMe Fri 25-Jan-13 19:32:42

I hate the dentist and very very rarely go. Thankfully I've never had to have a filling (or worse) but do have a scale and polish. I moved to a new dentist last year while 6 months pregnant and she was very rough, so much so that I cried from the pain. Did she stop, or offer pain relief? No. She laughed at me and said I was very silly and asked how on earth I expected to have a baby if I couldn't cope with this! (I ended up with an EMCS and coped fine, thank you very much!).

My new dentist offers the numbing injection and is lovely. For some reason I just find things poking in my mouth so very painful.

stephrick Fri 25-Jan-13 19:51:38

I'm a dentist phob but had to go when registered my children at a new surgery after a move, I hadn't been for 15 years. She was fairly impressed, one small filling. When you have a phobia you take better care of them, brush and floss twice a day.

wink MrsMorton I am definately not 2 out of the 4 things on your list...

sleepyhead Fri 25-Jan-13 21:57:25

She might want to brush up on her skills with nervous patients. Dental phobia is often caused by fear that the patient will be told off/given a row by the dentist or shock them with the state of their teeth/gums. It's a very common reason for people not to attend for years and therefore the antithesis of preventative care.

Maybe she doesn't care, or was just having an off day though...

There are ways of saying these things re: oral hygiene (and they do have to be said). I'm lucky that my dentist specialises in nervous patients, and despite me not having visited for over 6 years before finally getting up the courage a couple of years ago was very matter of fact and lovely, and got me sorted out without making me feel like a complete reprobate.

FeltOverlooked Fri 25-Jan-13 22:03:35

Why does going straight from work mean you haven't brushed? If I know I'll be going straight from somewhere to the dentist, I just get there five minutes early and brush in their loos. I thought everyone did - this thread is an eye opener!

Well, I would dread to think what a dentist would say to me about my teeth.

I have three teeth with about half missing each. The reason for my tooth loss is the reason I am petrified of going to the dentist. I had three fillings when I was 13/14 all without pain relief sad aka the reason I will not go to the dentist. These three teeth have all chipped to the point I am missing about half of each tooth.

I need to register with the dentist that sedates you, when I can afford it. If I could get all my teeth taken out and dentures in place I would.

pigletmania Fri 25-Jan-13 22:31:42

Oh yes the mouth police grin. They are all cut from te same cloth, I have had many run in with them

CalamityJ Fri 25-Jan-13 22:34:12

YANBU. I "confessed" to my dentist and hygienist that when really sick in the first 4 months of pregnancy I neglected my toothbrushing and flossing because mint made (and still makes) me feel sick. They were sympathetic (one male, one female) and made suggestions of what I could do to get through it (mouthwash instead, non mint floss). Judgemental dentists are why people are scared to go in the first place, leave it so long and end up in bother! You've had a bad experience and shouldn't have to put up with it. Choose a new dentist. You'll feel much more comfortable about going once you do.

tigerdriverII Fri 25-Jan-13 22:39:24

My dentist is lovely, but he looks about 12 (must be about 30 really) and he wears rather nice converse so I am vaguely thinking how nice and cool he is and how I am old enough to be his mum rather than worrying about him patronising me or hiw much it hurts. I rather suspect the patronising is the other way round....

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