In law issues, would really appreciate some objective views pls

(53 Posts)
bbface Tue 15-Jan-13 07:51:30

I will try to keep this short and sweet so as not to be too boring.

I am pregnant with dc 2. DS1 is 2.3. My parents both died when I was in my twenties (I am now 31). I was very close to them, they would have been a wonderful support. I tell you this, so you understand I do not have the strength of a family behind me.

My DH is foreign. I get on very well with his parents. His mother especially so. Soon after the birth of DC2, DH will go abroad with work, so MIL has offered to come and help. I thought this was a lovely idea and have agreed wholeheartedly.

My FIL is a good man, but my goodness, he is unquestionably the most stubborn, bloody minded man I have ever come across. We agreed that he would come at the end of my MiL's visit and stay for a week. He now wants to stay alone after my MIl has returned. He is push push pushing it, despite me repeatedly saying that he can come for a week at the end of my MIl's stay but I would prefer he doesn't stay alone.

I will have a newborn, a toddler, no family network and will be breastfeeding every two hours or so. What on earth will I do with my FIL?? He will not be able to drive, and I have no clue as to what he is expecting from me. As for dinner in the evening, he will be lucky if he gets a microwave meal, but that will stress me out as I will feel I should be giving him a proper dinner seeing as he is visiting from overseas. My DH has explained that he is a little competitive with my MIl and wants to spend the same amount of time here as she did.

I struggle with him, I really do. Mainly because my father was so considerate and sensitive to others I.e. if he had got the sense that I did not want him here alone, he would have instantaneously backed away. Whereas my FIL just keeps pushing the point.

I am now getting quite worked up about this. But I need to know, am I being daft? Should I just back down and say that he can come alone? Am I being unfair? Pls be as brutal as you wish.

Jux Fri 18-Jan-13 16:01:51

Hooray! Well done your dh thanks though grin at 'woman time'. Mind you, it was probably the very best expression to use on your FIL!

ZillionChocolate Mon 21-Jan-13 08:40:31

Glad you've got it sorted!

FriendlyLadybird Mon 21-Jan-13 10:12:44

Well done to your DH. I think 'woman time' was a masterstroke -- probably terrified your FiL!

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