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to find books and magazines by the toilet unnecessary and unhygienic

(176 Posts)
SunsetMojito Sun 13-Jan-13 21:50:21

I have even seen a magazine rack placed helpfully beside one!
Boak!
and how long to you actually need to spend in there that you cannot manage without reading?

PickledInAPearTree Sun 13-Jan-13 22:27:49

I need entertainment on the loo. I only draw the line as DP takes in cookery books and I do think they may get poo particles on them.

I take my kindle in there now.

I may start a small library some of you have given me inspiration.

PickledInAPearTree Sun 13-Jan-13 22:28:17

Thanks a LOT goths! grin

You love me Pickled grin

Milliways Sun 13-Jan-13 22:28:45

Please recommend me the best magazines or whatever for when I have to occupy the bathroom for the day before a colonoscopy! smile

WorraLiberty Sun 13-Jan-13 22:29:22

Do you wash your hands after you've been to the loo OP...or do you just lick your fingers clean?

If its' the latter then YANBU

BlackholesAndRevelations Sun 13-Jan-13 22:29:31

bogey funnily enough, no I don't picture people shitting when I go into a toilet sans reading material! Just when I see books there, I think, "so that's what you read when you have a poo," and imagine them sitting there! smile

Bogeyface Sun 13-Jan-13 22:29:39

So we are all breathing shit vapour, right now?! Even shit vapour from the man that came to fix the washing machine and didnt even use the loo?!

[Mischievous emoticon]

Oh yes Bogey Nice deep breaths now grin

PickledInAPearTree Sun 13-Jan-13 22:31:02

I dont see the harm

You just go in, pull down your trousers and pants. Sit on bog. Pick up book.

Poo.

Read a bit

Put book back

Wipe your arse

Flush

Wash hands.

At no point do you poke your finger in your poo and put it on the book?

neveronamonday Sun 13-Jan-13 22:31:06

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WorraLiberty Sun 13-Jan-13 22:32:00

At no point do you poke your finger in your poo and put it on the book?

What if there's no pen for the crossword?

PickledInAPearTree Sun 13-Jan-13 22:32:12

have you seen those lights that show up piss stains? They were using them on Hotel Inspector or similar. Piss EVERYWHERE! Even on the ceilings.

Bogeyface Sun 13-Jan-13 22:32:17

According to H, Steve Martin has a theory that above the Ozone Layer is the Fart Layer. He says that when the OL goes, the fart layer will fall to earth but the farts will not return to their original owner, so we have to save the OL in order to prevent us all being engulfed by other peoples old farts grin

BlackholesAndRevelations Sun 13-Jan-13 22:32:40

My dp is currently exuding shit vapour next to me in bed hmm

Greensleeves Sun 13-Jan-13 22:33:53

At no point do you poke your finger in your poo and put it on the book?

unless it turns out to have been written by Martin Amis

I would hate to be a guest in some of your houses. Shoes off at the door and no books in the john. Shudder.

never Just for you

Note the poo particles found in the kitchen two rooms away. Hope you don't eat in your kitchen either? wink

Bogeyface Sun 13-Jan-13 22:34:03

never there was a post a while back about a man (might have been her DH, not sure) who would take a sandwich and a drink up there with him.

I am pretty laid back about all things bodily, but that was a step waaaaaaaaay too far!

worra I fell off my chair laughing at that!

Hassled Sun 13-Jan-13 22:34:47

DS3 was once found reading on the loo while plugged into his iPod. When I say "found" - I went in to check he hadn't died because he'd been there for hours and wasn't responding to discrete knocks.

Fairylea Sun 13-Jan-13 22:35:14

I read on the loo. Dh thinks I'm mad but I can't go without something.... !!

And it has to be a magazine or holiday brochure. Novels etc too much concentration. Magazines are just right, especially the ads !

I don't touch anyone else's toilet reading stuff though in other houses.

It's my one odd and probably disgusting habit.

Oh well......

Greensleeves Sun 13-Jan-13 22:35:21

MIL used to get constipated when dh was a kid, she would bellow for him to bring her an apple to help her shift it

now THAT is grim

WorraLiberty Sun 13-Jan-13 22:35:52

Good job you weren't on the loo then Goths grin

Hassled Sun 13-Jan-13 22:35:59

grin at Martin Amis. I'd love to make a dirty protest on a Martin Amis book.

BlackholesAndRevelations Sun 13-Jan-13 22:36:12

Ps. When reading for purposes of helping along a constipated poo, shouldn't it be:

Pants down, sit on loo
Read
Read some more
Poo
Wipe
Flush etc

I have never understood people who sit in their own shit vapour rather than just wiping and getting the hell out of there.

Quite Worra then poo particles would have been the least of my worries grin

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