to not buy DD2 a car even though we bought DD1 one?

(77 Posts)
MissMiaWallace Sun 13-Jan-13 20:20:52

We have three daughters. Aged 24, 20 and 14. We have always treated them the same. Such as when DD1 was 11 she got her ears pierced and so DD2 and DD3 could too at that age, and if one is given £10 so are the others etc.

DD1 started driving as soon as she turned 17. We bought her a car whilst she was learning (nothing expensive) as dh worked away a lot and my car is a manual. She failed her first test and then stopped driving.

We then had 3 cars which was a complete waste of money, and so we decided to sell it.

My DD2 has started learning to drive now and has asked for a car. We have said no as she is insured on dh's car as he does not work away anymore.

In her eyes she says she should have a car as her older sister did and it's unfair for her to get punished for her sisters actions.

In our opinion we don't want the same mistake to happen again and also DD2 has had money spent on her in other ways. We have paid for 2 holidays away with her friends, as she doesn't come on family holidays anymore and she has had a new laptop for uni.

aibu to not buy her a car?

firesidechat Tue 15-Jan-13 08:15:38

Just to add. Daughter at uni has had to share my car for years and still does when she is home. Didn't do her any harm.

fluffyraggies Tue 15-Jan-13 08:41:47

3 teen DDs here too.

DD1 has just turned 20. She had a car bought for her AFTER she passed her 3rd driving test last summer. She pays for the insurance and tax with money from a job which, if she didn't have a car she wouldn't be able to do, as we live out in the countryside where there is little public transport. She helped pay for her lessons too, with money from her GM, a small PT job, and her EMA while she was still at college.

DD2 is 17, is at college but gets no EMA (it's now un-available), refuses to get a PT job while at college, and has no interest in learning to drive, (her BF drives ans she happily bus hops where possible) has a completely different set of ideas and principals to DD1. So ...... genuinely isn't bothered about what her sister has/had/did/does etc.

DD3 - still at school at the moment, but i can see her being allot more inclined to get a job asap and want to be mobile, like her eldest sister .....

Hmm - is DD2 going to get all bitter and twisted at us in a few years?

DD1, who is the one with a car remember, had a really massive strop recently, tears and all, about how DD2 floats by, with no PT job, and no car and why aren't we forcing her into it?!?

Kids ay?

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