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AIBU?

To consider private for my DS's on our income?

152 replies

Lotsofknockers · 12/01/2013 18:27

I don't wish to get into the state vs private but am considering private for my DS's for various reasons - is it affordable on a income of £130k per year? Day dees around 10k per year which will rise for prep. We live in London - one DS would go this year the other in two years time but there would be consideration of nursery fees of around £800 a month so technically the same as two lots of fees now. Are we mad to consider it? Will we be struggling? Mortgage is around £1300 per month.

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betterwhenthesunshines · 12/01/2013 18:30

Only you know the answer to that. But in planning for the future I would also say look ahead to secondary fees (usually a lot higher). Our prep fees are higher than those you mention. Also ask the school what their annual fee raise is - one of ours has risen 25% in the last 4 years - yes, even though no ones salaries are rising to cover it. It is making it painful each term!

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moogy1a · 12/01/2013 18:30

This is a pisstake I presume?

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Binkybix · 12/01/2013 18:31

I'm sure you could afford it, but think you would notice the difference in your quality of life - depending what you spend now, you might need to compromise on tings like holidays. If you have another child, you would need to think about that too, unless planning a social experiment!

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Narked · 12/01/2013 18:33

£130k before tax?

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Lotsofknockers · 12/01/2013 18:35

No not a pisstake a genuine question - I hadn't factored in the annual fee rises and certainly not 25% that sounds extortionate! Holidays would definitely have to be the compromise and have definitely ruled out more children if we go down this route.

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Lotsofknockers · 12/01/2013 18:36

Yep - 130k before tax

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betterwhenthesunshines · 12/01/2013 18:37

Not 25% each year. 25% over the four year period. The other school has risen 11% over the same period so it's definitely worth asking as it is quite a difference.

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WipsGlitter · 12/01/2013 18:39

Do you have a spreadsheet detailing current income and expenditure? Do they as a first step and it should be quickly apparent if you can afford it.

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betterwhenthesunshines · 12/01/2013 18:39

You might also want to think about house plans - do you want to move at anytime? Which is a priority?

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Virgil · 12/01/2013 18:39

Difficult to say but what is your net monthly income? About £6k? Work backwards from that. Factor in the price increases each year, the compulsory lunches, compulsory trips, compulsory music lessons perhaps, extortionate cost of uniform (DS1s came to £350 this year and he already needs a new blazer) etc etc

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bluebiscuit · 12/01/2013 18:42

How much net income do you get actually paid into your bank accounts each month. Am not sure if 1 person or 2 people are earning the £130k.

Then just write it out on a monthly basis - money in and money out.

If the fees are 10k per yr, probably budget £1k per month to cover any extras or fee increasesin the short term.

Are there any cheaper private schools in the area? £10k per year for reception is huge (IMO).

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Lotsofknockers · 12/01/2013 18:50

2 people - just under 7k a month. I have done a basic budget and on the face of it it does seem affordable if we exclude holidays it's the extras that might just tip us over. I do hope to move house in he future but if there are to be no additional children then there might not be any need!
This is one of the cheaper schools!

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LIZS · 12/01/2013 18:52

It will depend where in the country you a e . Secondary can vary from 3k to 6k+ per term depending on area and demand.

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Cathycomehome · 12/01/2013 18:53

£7k a month!! Can't help with the question, but would you consider adopting me? Grin

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PoppyWearer · 12/01/2013 18:57

With similar numbers (but just outside London) we decided no, we weren't prepared to go without holidays etc given the hours DH is working to earn that much money. Instead we opted to move to an area with excellent state schools (primary at least) and will re-assess with regard to age 11+.

In the area where we live, this seems to be "the norm".

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NumericalMum · 12/01/2013 19:01

We only have one DC and a bit more income but much higher mortgage etc. It is a huge chunk of income going out each month, but we know that our DC's schooling is sorted forever thankfully. Would like more children but need to get our other expenses down and factor in no longer being able to do holidays etc. The other costs are quite high. Uniforms, trips etc but I think they are fairly spread out over the year.

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DamnBamboo · 12/01/2013 19:03

Depends on so many things. You need a spreadsheet to work this all out.
FWIW, we earn more than that but wouldn't consider putting ours in private (we have 3)

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bluebiscuit · 12/01/2013 19:08

Another thing to consider is state infants - reception to yr 2 and then to switch to private. Think(not certain) that y3 is a common entry point. Then you'll save 3 yrs of fees which is £60k between both your kids. Then put that towards higher years. Also consider if either of your salaries will rise in the future.

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ihearsounds · 12/01/2013 19:13

Erm for me yes. For you, honestly no. Reason being, if this is geniune you seem to lack commonsense to realise that only you can answer this by looking at your finances in detail. We dont know your spending habits.

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marriedinwhite · 12/01/2013 19:22

If your mortgage payments are 1300 I'm afraid I would say no. Interest rates are very low and likely to rise in the medium term. Also the fees will go up and only up. When our DS started prep school the fees were about £10k per annum - that was in 2003 - He's now in 6th form and the fees are about £19k per annum and we allow for about another £700 per term for general expenses such as lunches, lost books, etc. Trips (about 1k per annum on average). Uniform never been much of a problem. DD's fees are a bit cheaper and she didn't go to indy until year 9 but the overall expenses because of the daily bus fee mean it is much less.

So OP that's about £3k per month just on school related expenses (we spent approx £37,500 last year on indy schools for two teenagers). I think you need to allow for hefty fee increases and mortgage increases. That could easily be £5k per month min in five years time. Factor in food, utilities, insurances, running a car, household maintenance and replacing stuff like sofas, w/machines, plus holiday activities and possible childcare cover etc., then no I don't think it's a runner for you.

Can't you start off at a good primary school and switch them later, saving a bit towards the overall cost in the meantime. Save your money for when they are bigger and actually when you are more certain of the sort of school that will suit them best and it might not be the same school for both.

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pingu2209 · 12/01/2013 19:28

I think you could but it would be a struggle. It would also depend upon whether one of you could lose your income too.

My dh earns £80k per year and we have 3 children. We can't afford private education, even though our mortgage is only £350 per month. The pressure to keep the fees paid would be too much on my dh and I think that it could crack the family.

I would think that if my dh earned £130k and I knew that it would continue, we would go the private route. However, my dh job is very insecure and once you go the private route you can't really leave it without a massive amount of heart ache.

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PoppyWearer · 12/01/2013 19:35

pingu makes a good point about pressure to earn money to pay the fees.

I have seen at least one marriage collapse under this pressure when the DH lost his job and the school fees could not be paid. They ended up selling the family home to maintain the fees (the children were at a critical point in their schooling, GCSEs and A-levels) and it split the family.

In the company where I used to work we had several rounds of redundancies and the first response of many of the employees who were parents was often not concern about mortgage payments but "oh shit, how are we going to pay the school fees now?".

DH and I made a pact not to get into this position unless we had money saved to cover the entire schooling (we are aiming for age 11-18). If not, I would rather stick with the state system.

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Lasvegas · 12/01/2013 19:36

We have similar ish take home amount. Live and school greater london so expensive commute and mortgage (We paid 8k for nursery so when it came to school fees plus wrap around care and holiday nanny it was not much more. Or so i thought. hence move forward to year 5 Have one and a bit years left at private school and am hoping child gets into state school. Am fed up not being able to save enough for pension and keep a buffer for roof repair etc or save for kids possible uni fees. We are lucky though and local comp is excellent and all I would want in a school. If we lived in area where only state school was unsuitable I would continue to pay for private.

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lisad123everybodydancenow · 12/01/2013 19:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

myron · 12/01/2013 19:46

Prep school fees are higher as they move up the school. If you have concerns now, I suspect that it will be a huge sacrifice to your current lifestyle if you need to fund the fees entirely out of income. You could delay the decision for a few more years until they reach prep school age. That's what we have done.

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