To be on MN even though I don't have children?

(110 Posts)
IwantaPetFox Wed 09-Jan-13 08:32:34

I know this argument has been done to death, but still on so many threads I see people being questioned as to why they're here if they don't have DCs and aren't/can't ttc.

I'm not a regular by any means but I ended up here after a Google search threw up one of the funniest threads I've ever read (Medieval Mumsnet - I'm a historian and it tickled me). I signed up because it's such a busy forum full of highly intelligent women around my age and I've since seen some of the best relationship advice and arguments for feminism I've ever read.

And as most people are parents it's not like I'm trying to infiltrate an exclusive club. I'll probably have kids one day but even if I don't, I will still be surrounded by them because they are a huge part of human life!

But if anyone has any genuine objections as to why it's wrong/odd for non parents to be here, I am interested and open to them.

SomersetONeil Wed 09-Jan-13 18:26:19

You don't think there is a difference between a doctor one year out of training, and 20 years out...?

Surely one is going to have a fast deal more - yes - experience, and therefore knowledge, empathy, understanding, technical skill...?

Another one who came here via the Times article. Never left since. I have DC but Tbh I post and lurk on threads that usually have nothing directly to do with parenting, except in passing.

IwantaPetFox Wed 09-Jan-13 18:44:05

Somerset I think crashdoll meant she doesn't care whether the doctor has experienced the illness personally, as in suffered from it him/herself!

RedToothbrush Wed 09-Jan-13 18:44:26

A doctor of 20 years can be ill informed of new ways of dealing with a condition.

They can equally be jaded of practice and have developed poor bed side manner.

A new doctor may actually have better empathy due to the fact they are newly trained and still doing through examinations and therefore more closely monitored by others.

LimeLeafLizard Wed 09-Jan-13 18:54:26

Hello petfox, I agreed with you on the other thread yesterday and I agree with you again today.

YANBU.

<Off to search for medieval mumsnet thread which sounds funny>

Goldenbear Wed 09-Jan-13 19:04:01

Being a parent is not comparable to a profession because it is a relationship first and foremost - that is the difference. You learn how to be one 'on the job', you're not given a manual before you give birth that is going to equip you with knowledge on how to deal with every eventuality, you can't have the experience of developing a relationship before it has begun.

crashdoll Wed 09-Jan-13 19:37:15

I find it quite strange that you think a non-parent can't empathise because they haven't had the experience. I would never pretend to know how to be a parent or what I would do but I can empathise. After all, I do have parents myself, so I have a vague idea of the parent child relationship! grin

Goldenbear
If being a parent qualifies you to advise other parents why oh why do we get so many MIL threads on here! confused

Goldenbear Wed 09-Jan-13 21:41:26

Well often those differences are a result of attitudes differing between the generations. I am talking about parental instincts that cannot be learnt. These are cross generational and have nothing to do with parental styles. Of course there are exceptions to this like anything.

crashdoll Thu 10-Jan-13 07:43:57

I'm not saying I know what it's like to be a parent (because I don't) but just because you may not be able to empathise, doesn't mean others of us cannot!

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