To ask mum for a set time.

(15 Posts)
happynewmind Sat 05-Jan-13 09:56:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

39widow Sat 05-Jan-13 09:59:22

i have a child on the spectrum cso no i dont think you are.
i would tell your mum how much it upsets dd - good luck

HavingALittleFaithBaby Sat 05-Jan-13 10:02:11

If your DC is on the AS then no, YANBU! I would tell her you expect her at a set time (since she isn't sticking to informing you when you ask!) and if she doesn't come at the time, refuse to see her. Does she understand the impact she's having on your DD messing you around?

diddl Sat 05-Jan-13 10:07:58

Of course YANBU:

Waiting in for a whole day-what a waste!!

And as you say-do you do meals or not?

I think it´s really rude tbh-regardless of it really upsetting her own GC!!

Does she not believe in autism & thinks she is helping my not "pandering"??

Llareggub Sat 05-Jan-13 10:12:19

Really how annoying! Does your mother not see the impact on her GC?

Could you sit her down calmly and explain to her?

cansu Sat 05-Jan-13 10:13:47

That would not work for me and I would say it just like that. Please can you tell me what time you will be collecting us as I need to explain what we will be doing to the children. If she says she doesn't know say ok we will make our own way and be there around X time. Then stick to your guns. I would be beyond pissed off with her attitude. It implies that you have nothing else to do but wait around for her.

WildWorld2004 Sat 05-Jan-13 10:13:50

YANBU I think it is rude to expect anyone to wait in all day for someone. Whats so difficult with setting a time and sticking to it.

OwlCatMouse Sat 05-Jan-13 10:16:13

YANBU, AS or not. You can't be expected to wait all day for your mum to pick you up.

dishwashervodkaanddietirnbru Sat 05-Jan-13 10:16:30

that would annoy me never mind a child on the autistic spectrum! There's nothing I hate more than having to hang about waiting on someone else to turn up especially if they cannot be contacted.

happynewmind Sat 05-Jan-13 10:21:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ceeveebee Sat 05-Jan-13 10:22:37

Well I'm not on the austitic spectrum but it would irritate me immensely to not have a specific time or at least a rough time- she expects you to wait in until 4 not knowing whether you need to cook lunch, tea? Just tell her a time that suits you, and go out rather than wait in.

Katla Sat 05-Jan-13 10:25:32

YANBU - how irritating at the best of times but esp as your dd gets upset.

How about just saying no to her offer of a lift and then you are on your timescale (even though it's more hassle at least you would be in control)?

dishwashervodkaanddietirnbru Sat 05-Jan-13 10:26:45

I'd go out if she hasnt arrived by a certain time - serve her right for not arranging things properly

whattodoo Sat 05-Jan-13 10:27:14

Go to the activities!

Tell your mum that you'll be back home at x time if she wants to pick you up, or you'll make your own way over and be at her home at y time.

ChristmasJubilee Sat 05-Jan-13 10:27:30

Tell her that your children have activities in the morning and do that. Ask her to pick you up at a given time or tell her you will make your own way there. Do you really want to go every weekend - that would drive me mad!

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