They are 12 and 8 respectively.
They live abroad, and their mother (my sister) is very, very label/image conscious wrt to everything they have. It is increasingly difficult to get them anything "acceptable". For the last two years I have not had any thanks or aknowledgement of their presents. DNeph had a birthday recently. DSis told me he needed a new hoody, and to get something from Abercrombie and Fitch.I am not in that kind if league atvall, so.I sent him some money - the equivalent of £25. I know he got it because when DM asked DSis about it, she dismissed it as "not really worth thanking for".
My children are much younger and DSis's presents to them are not un-generous, but always OTT. Eg DS wanted his own copy of a particular Julia Donaldson book for his birthday. So she sent him that, and 4 or 6 other books he already had. DD (1) needed some winter clothes, so she sent designer frilly stuff, rather than anything at all practical. That sounds really ungrateful doesn't it? But I do always write and thank her!
We rarely speak and I maintain a skeleton relationship with her primarily for DM's sake. We are very, very different people, and if I met her at a party for example,, then we wouldn't become friends. Our relationship wavers between ambivalent and toxic (she is queen of passive aggressive).
I know I should not blight DNeph and DNiece with my history with their mother, but the expectation and lack of gratitude are really peeing me off. And DSis does not send OTT presents to be generous, she does it to show off that she can.
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AIBU?
AIBU not to give my nephew and niece Christmas presents?
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BikeRunSki · 23/11/2012 20:18
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