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AIBU?

AIBU to leave DH to make his own way home?

103 replies

teenyweenytadpole · 22/11/2012 22:23

DH due home from London tonight. I had to pick him up from the station as we are having car troubles. Told me he would be on the train arriving at 8.45. Texted me to say he was on train. Now I have been at work all day, come home, fed children, sorted house, been parent helper at guides also. Drove 20 mins in dark and rain to station, waited 25 mins as train was late due to weather. Train came in to station. Train left station. No DH. Called him, sent texts, no reply. So we drove home and the DD's are now in bed asleep. He has just rung, and clearly he has been drinking. The story is he fell asleep and missed his stop, went several stops down the line in fact and is now wending his way back home. I have told him to make his own way back from the station. Now this will be tricky as we live in the arse end of nowhere and there are no taxis. Station a good 10 miles away across country lanes. He clearly thinks I am being unreasonable for not collecting him. AIBU? WWYD?

OP posts:

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hf128219 · 22/11/2012 22:26

Can he not order a taxi to pick him up?

teenyweenytadpole · 22/11/2012 22:28

He can try but he'll be lucky to get someone to come out, the taxis round here are mostly pre-booked posh jobs that do airport runs etc. No buses.

OP posts:

CajaDeLaMemoria · 22/11/2012 22:28

Yes. If you didn't live in the middle of nowhere you wouldn't be, but as it is he'll have to walk. That's potentially dangerous, even if he hasn't been drinking.

CajaDeLaMemoria · 22/11/2012 22:29

Yes. If you didn't live in the middle of nowhere you wouldn't be, but as it is he'll have to walk. That's potentially dangerous, even if he hasn't been drinking.

teenyweenytadpole · 22/11/2012 22:31

He could get off at another stop and spend the night in a pub. He's done it before.

So should I leave the DD's asleep in their beds to go and get him which is what he thinks I should do?

Or do I wake them up and take them?? They have school tomorrow!

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ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 22/11/2012 22:33

How old are dds?

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 22/11/2012 22:34

Would you have to wake up your DDs and put them in the car to collect him?

goralka · 22/11/2012 22:34

leave them asleep and go and get him

uniqueatlast · 22/11/2012 22:34

I'd wake them and get him but by gosh I'd make him know about it/pay.

You absolutely cannot leave the children asleep.

goralka · 22/11/2012 22:34

leave them a note in case they wake up

McTagster · 22/11/2012 22:35

10 miles across country lanes? I'd go and get him.

teenyweenytadpole · 22/11/2012 22:35

DD's 11 and 8.

OP posts:

goralka · 22/11/2012 22:35

ooops conflicting advice here....

UnexpectedItemInShaggingArea · 22/11/2012 22:35

x post - how old are they? If they are old enough to be left I would still wake to tell them you are going out.

Does your DH often drink so much he misses his train stop?

goralka · 22/11/2012 22:36

of course you can leave them you will be 45 minutes...if he is a bit pissed and it's all country lanes and shit weather it would be mean to leave him....

CocoPopsAddict · 22/11/2012 22:36

I wouldn't leave them at that age.

wewereherefirst · 22/11/2012 22:38

I wouldn't leave them, they're too young. Can you ring a few taxi companies for him?

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 22/11/2012 22:38

Have you left them before? Are they likely to wake up?

Leave them a note & go get him?

teenyweenytadpole · 22/11/2012 22:38

Well he is now not answering his phone and I don't know where he is. I have texted him asking where he is but no response.

OP posts:

SamSmalaidh · 22/11/2012 22:38

I think you have to get him, but I would be furious!

akaemmafrost · 22/11/2012 22:39

I wouldn't leave them. Order him a cab to pick him up from the station?

teenyweenytadpole · 22/11/2012 22:39

And yes he has done this before. Last week in fact. And other occasions. There's a long backstory to this which I have posted about before on relationships. Just sometimes I lose my sense of perspective and actually think IABU when actually I think really I am not!

OP posts:

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SandStorm · 22/11/2012 22:40

11 and 8 is absolutely fine to leave them for the time it will take to go and get him. You can give him hell tomorrow but how would you feel if he doesn't make it home down those dark, country lanes?

If you can, wake the 11 year old just enough to let her know what you're doing though.

GoldPlatedNineDoors · 22/11/2012 22:40

Leave him sort himself out. Irresponsible ignorant tosser.

SamSmalaidh · 22/11/2012 22:41

Actually if he does this often, leave him to it. Has he got a credit card? He can get a train to somewhere with taxis/hotels.

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