Got woken up at 5am by a call on the house phone (which scared the crap out of me as O thought someone had died!). It was dp - he has a job where he starts very early that is in the middle of nowhere, and on the way he drove through a big puddle too fast and conked the car out.
He was asking me if I could come out and take him the rest of the way to work. I ask him why not call the breakdown service that we pay good money for and never use? His response is that they would take ages to get there and he needs to get to work ASAP to set up and let everyone in (he has a supervisory role and is a key holder).
Bearing in mind it is dark and pissing it down outside, and I have a 22 mo dd in bed fast asleep next to me as she has had an unsettled night due to a cold and molars cutting through who I would have to drag up too. And he is about half an hours drive away, his work is even further, and unusually I get up not long after 6 to get ready for work myself, so chances are this would all make me late for my job too!
I reluctantly agreed at first, but a few minutes later it occured to me that perhaps one of these other people that would also be on their way to work with him could maybe leave 10 minutes earlier, take a detour and go and get him, so I called him back. He said he had got the car started now anyway sonot to worry.
But was ibu for being reluctant? I feels bit guilty now! But my reasoning is we pay for breakdown cover for a reason, and if he was late for work just once that would have to just deal with it?! It takes me back to the time dp said he was reluctant to ask for time off for my elcs because it was a busy time at work! I told him in no uncertain terms it wasn't a question of asking, he was to TELL them he was having the day off for the birth of his daughter!
I feel a bit guilty now and can't get back to sleep (thanks dp!). If I was broken down I have to admit I would quite like to be rescued, but I am pretty sure I wouldn't expect someone to drag a sleeping baby out of bed. It was just late enough as well that I reckon if I had woken dd up she wouldn't have gone back to sleep in the car and would have been tired and cranky for the childminder all day...
AIBU?
To not go out and rescue dp at 5am as that is what we have breakdown cover for?!
MummysHappyPills · 21/11/2012 05:48
Ta! 
Maybe be guilt will be appeased enough for me to get back to sleep (for 15 measly minutes!)...
He was reluctant to ask for time off for the birth of his child?! 
Well sort of glad to hear I am not being TOTALLY unreasonable at least!
Thanks for your concern grobags, but there is nothing too bad going on. DP is a gentle soul and has a very good work ethic which I admire, but he is not compleltey obsessed with his job! I think it is more a case of not enjoying stressful/complicated/confrontational situations so when a situation like my CS or this crops up his first thoughts are "crap, we are really busy at work/I'm going to be late, work will be pissed off" etc. I think it doesn't help that one of the bosses there is a bit of an intolerant arse, which is ironic seeing as it's meant to be quite an ethical "right on" company.
He did take his full paternity leave and an extra 2 weeks holiday which they were absolutely fine about, I think it was more a case that dp was just scared to ask/broach the subject as it was a super busy time.
I do feel a bit guilty for not rushing out so I totally get why some of you think iab a bit u. If it was me, I probably would call dp to moan about it, but I would wait for the AA, especially if dp was home with dd in bed. Though actually if I knew dp would be asleep I wouldn't even call to moan! DD also has a cold and teetch coming through so was up half the night and I thought it was really unfair to deprive her of even more sleep so that was a factor as well.
I appreciate his work relies him to get there on time, but surely they have to accept that sometimes shit happens? There are other keyholders that may not have been due in til later, but surely it would have made more sense to drag them out of bed than me? I know dp has had to go in on his day off to sort out emergencies before.
I just think on balance dp thought it was preferable to disturb mine and dd's sleep rather than be a bit late and face mild (unjustified - who doesn't have car trouble once in a blue moon?) disapproval at work - which irks me a little!!
I literally called him a few seconds diddl so I expect he would have been just about to call me back! Although could have been disastrous if I'd have left to get him without my phone!
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I am also thinking he maybe didn't want to call out AA as he felt silly for driving through puddle and causing it himself?
Anyway I haven't heard from him so assume he got there ok!
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