AIBU to think there are a lot of posters outraged by benign/factual observations?

[Proudnscary]

Just a little note to the professionally outraged Mumsnetters who object to people commenting on their bump size, the age gap of their kids, how small/tall their children are, what they're wearing etc etc....

People aren't actually particularly interested in your pregnancy/family planning/child's development/sartorial choices - they are making polite conversation. A huge majority of the time it is not meant as an insult. It is a passing - possibly inane - comment.

I think a few people need to see past their own noses. Or grow thicker skins.

[Anniegetyourgun]

HOW DARE YOU

[NolaFfing]

YANBU.

It must be exhausting.

[Pagwatch]

What's wrong with my nose?
Are you saying my skin looks thin?

Ffs!

[Proudnscary]

Nola - yes exhausting. Can't work out if they are bored and exaggerating a situation to make up an AIBU or are genuinely offended by things THAT REALLY REALLY DON'T MATTER.

[Proudnscary]

It's a little on the skinny side, yes, Pagwatch

[KeemaNaanAndCurryOn]

Yeah but if you rid MN of stuff that really doesn't matter, the forum would collapse.

[Psammead]

Totally depends.

'Ooh, when are you due? You look like you don't have long to go!' v. 'You are massive! Is there something wrong with the baby? But then again, you are a big girl, aren't you?'

I have had both. Polite conversation is always welcome. It's not always polite and does not always invite conversation.

[Pagwatch]

I bet you are an elderly, child kissing old cowbag.

When I was pregnant first time I was gnormous. I used to want people to notice. I was hopelessly excited about being pregnant and treated my huge bump like some kind of badge of honour.
I was always a bit let down if I didn't get a few 'fucking hell, you're huge' comments.
I also liked people rubbing my bump
[weirdo]

[TheVermiciousKnid]

Move your nose, Pagwatch, I can't see the thread! Ah, that's better.

Do the 'professionally offended' get paid, as they are professionals?



YANBU, OP - but it always depends on the context and/or how it is said. Some people make 'factual' comments in a way that can be quite hurtful, and then claim that they call a spade a spade etc.

[Jusfloatingby]

Yes, some very precious types on here at times. Seem to go around with eyes all screwed up and slitty as they search desperately for things to get offended or self righteous about.

[cumfy]

Pagwatch

I think she must be saying you have a huge conker.
I wouldn't stand for that, I just wouldn't.

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

I think a few people need to see past their own noses. Or grow thicker skins

A - bloody-men to that!!!!

[Pascha]

I got "I love your bump, its cute, much smaller than my friend's and she's only due a week before you" from a mum at playgroup today Not sure whether to be offended on the friends behalf for being bigger than me, or offended on my own behalf for being too small, or just offended because my bump is cute...

Maybe I should just start a thread in AIBU which is the professionally offended's position?

[CogitoErgoSometimes]

YANBU but why limit the outrage to actual comments? What about the spookily telepathic AIBU-er use others' thoughts to get outraged? "... and the man walking past me in the street just looked at me and I knew the evil old git was thinking that my child/dog/hair-cut/handbag was a blight on society..."

[Proudnscary]

Verm - yes true, of course there are a smattering of rude cowbags in this world. But some people don't seem to be able to sift the cowgags from the nicenormalbags.

[Proudnscary]

Cogito - yes but the telepathically induced outrage is not as annoying as the big fat lie exaggerated scenario...

'Then this old woman elbowed by toddler out of the way and snapped 'Get your filthy bastard kids out of my way!'

[DilysPrice]

I remember the MNer with one child who was mortally offended by her next door neighbour with two children commenting in passing, as she wrangled her DCs to school "gosh mornings must be so easy with only one".
And no, she wasn't emotionally scarred by secondary infertility, and her one child didn't have massive behavioural difficulties, she was just shocked that this total bitch (who had almost certainly had one of those nightmare mornings) had dared to state the bleeding obvious

[Quenelle]

Same as Pagwatch, I enjoyed the attention when I was pregnant [needy]. I even didn't virtually explode when my boss felt my bump.

I like DS receiving attention from strangers and I love it when old people smile and talk to him. It was lovely when absolutely everyone used to comment on his gorgeous, fluffy, blond hair. Nobody has commented since his first haircut though

I have a theory that the people who claim to be offended by benign observations actually enjoy the attention and are pretending to be offended so they can get even more attention.

[Pagwatch]

This whole thing is a nightmare for me as I seem to feel personally responsible for every awkward gap in conversation - its a curse. When terrified of saying nothing I can come out with some classics.

[Proudnscary]

Quenelle - yes or it's a stealth boast: 'My dd has long, lustrous locks and a face that could launch a thousands ships - why THE HELL do people ONLY comment on her stunningly good looks and not her academic brilliance?'

[Chandon]

but I LOVE those threads!

If it says: "AIBU to want to f&cking THUMP that woman for smiling at my child?" or "AIBU to want to RIP the head of b7tch TA for not moving DS up another reading level?!" I will click on it.

For entertainment value.

is that bad

[Proudnscary]

Pag - actually could you just get of this thread as your nose is a fucking liability

But that's what I mean about polite convo - we all do it and it is often a stream of inane consiousness and means precisely nothing.

[NolaFfing]

I remember that thread Dilys.

[Jusfloatingby]

No Chandon. What would Mumsnet be without those precious, over analytical, taking themselves so seriously mums? It gives me a laugh as well.

[LadyBeagleEyes]

I quite like these threads too.
As a Middle Aged Woman I keep meaning to give young mums with kids a funny look in the supermarket, just to see if anyone starts a thread about it.
But I don't know how, what is a funny look?