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AIBU?

To not understand why any woman would not want to be a feminist?

574 replies

EatsBrainsAndLeaves · 16/09/2012 23:33

Seriously why would you want to be treated worse than men?

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RumbleGreen · 16/09/2012 23:36

Depends what they think a feminist represents, they might not know much about feminism maybe see one of the threads on in the Fwr section and think that's not for me.

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squeakytoy · 16/09/2012 23:39

because I enjoy being a woman.. and being feminine if it suits me, and I quite like being treated like a lady by men..

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porcamiseria · 16/09/2012 23:40

because the word feminist...needs a\ rebrand !

what rumble said

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MrDobalina · 16/09/2012 23:40

IMO, most women identify themselves as feminists; but the definition of what that means varies wildly. I'm a bit rad and impatient though Grin

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EatsBrainsAndLeaves · 16/09/2012 23:40

I enjoy being a woman and lots of feminists look feminine. Squeaky - do you mind saying what you mean by - being treated like a lady?

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SarahStratton · 16/09/2012 23:41

Is this your new slant?

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WorraLiberty · 16/09/2012 23:42

For me I just hate 'ists'.

I see 'ists' as labels and imo people don't need to be labelled.

If I called myself an anything 'ist', I would then feel I would have to live up to that label I've given myself.

And that label like 'feminist' for example, can mean many different things to many different people. I prefer to tell people I believe in equality for all because I absolutely do.

But having discovered MN, I would never label myself as a feminist because to be 100% honest, I wouldn't want to 'tag' myself as associated with some of the extremists on here.

Not sure if this makes sense?

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MrDobalina · 16/09/2012 23:42

yeah squeaky! answer EBL please! Grin

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CleoSmackYa · 16/09/2012 23:43

I agree with worra She has explained it much better than I.

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SPsFanjoSponsoredByOrange · 16/09/2012 23:43

I don't care about labels.

Women can treat men like shit too. If your are a cunt then your a cunt. Your gender doesn't matter.

So I am a person that doesn't allow anyone weather they are men or woman to treat me like shit.

Not a feminist.

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WorraLiberty · 16/09/2012 23:44

Pheww Cleo Grin

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EatsBrainsAndLeaves · 16/09/2012 23:45

Worra - Yes that does make sense. The feminists you think of as extreme, like radical feminists like myself, are actually a small proportion of feminists. Most feminists argue for equality between women and men. So if you argue for equality for all, you are in agreement with a lot of feminists.

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NewStartSameStory · 16/09/2012 23:45

why the fuck would i want to be classed as a feminist? really? I don't want tarring with the prejudice of the title. I don't want to be confined by the restrictions it brings either. just because you feel the need to be labelled, placed in a box with a particular point of view and complain about narrow mindedness about others, take a look in the mirror when you criticise others for making a choice that isn't yours. Run a long and live your life. And let others chose theirs.

And probably what Stratters said.

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Birdsgottafly · 16/09/2012 23:48

Any 'ism' challenges, the structual set up of society, the cultural norms and the personal.

I totally believe in all aspects of feminism in the first two, but am happy to leave out bits in my personal life, which is my right to choose.

I don't like to go to the bar if i am with my DP, for instance.

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squeakytoy · 16/09/2012 23:49

Quite simple really, I am a woman, I enjoy being complimented on my appearance, I like having doors held open for me, and I appreciate men who apologise for swearing in my presence amongst other things.

I find the hardline feminist approach that is often seen on these boards to be utterly bonkers most of the time, and having looked at many of the threads in the feminist section, I would never want to be associated with people who are so entrenched in finding fault with so many ridiculous issues, from the colour pink, to mocking women who shave their armpits, that given the choice between being classed as a 1950's houswife, or a radical feminist, I would put my pinny on any day!

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nailak · 16/09/2012 23:49

i dont want to be a feminist because i dont believe men and women are the same.

so flame me.

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SPsFanjoSponsoredByOrange · 16/09/2012 23:49

I am a wonttakeanyshitist if I have to be a "ist"

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pumpkinsweetie · 16/09/2012 23:49

Im with squeakytoy on this, i also like to be treated like a lady.
In my book it means having doors opened for me, flowers bought for me occasionally, taken out to dinner and walked home etc..

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TheCraicDealer · 16/09/2012 23:50

Agree with Worra. Also I'm of a generation where I haven't seen much obvious sexism. I've never, ever felt like I'm at a disadvantage because of my sex. Other people are often quick enough to assign labels, I'm not going to help them along.

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AgentZigzag · 16/09/2012 23:50

I like thinking about feminism and notice inequalities when they come up in RL, but I'm not a feminist in the way it's mostly defined as.

I'm not committed or toe any line, I don't identify with many of the posters I see who say they are feminists on MN, and I don't like how feminist 'discussions' go where crushing a person with an opposing view is valued.

You'd have get something from that sort of debate to want to be associated with feminism.

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EatsBrainsAndLeaves · 16/09/2012 23:50

squeaky - most feminists are not radical feminists. I understand why more women do not want to agree with this. But feminism is a much broader church than that.

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WorraLiberty · 16/09/2012 23:51

Absolutely I am in agreement with lots of feminists.

I do realise the radical feminists are a small proportion but it only takes that small proportion to kind of 'tar' the whole feminist thing for me and spoil it.

That said, I really don't believe in labels so even if I hadn't discovered MN and found women who quite openly try to oppress other women, I still wouldn't label myself.

The same as I don't label myself as any kind of political party supporter.

People are people imo and they believe what they believe...that doesn't always fit any kind of standard 'description' and nor should it really.

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vodkaandcaviar · 16/09/2012 23:52

I think 'feminism' just has a bad wrap. I don't know many/any women who would want to be treated as inferior at all.

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EatsBrainsAndLeaves · 16/09/2012 23:53

Nailak - Of course men and women are not the same. Women can have babies for a start. Different branches of feminism have different ideas about how much men and women vary though.

If you mean things like women cant drive as well as men, then no feminist would agree with you. But if you mean men are more aggressive than women, or strongher than women, then some feminists would agree and some would disagree

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thekidsrule · 16/09/2012 23:53

i dont think im one (but some males in my life would disagree)

compared to some on here im a stepford wife Wink

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