borrowing ds birthday money

[fryingpantoface]

Ok flame proof suit donned

Money is really tight this month. Dh had a role change at work a few months ago and therefore hasn't got a bonus this month and next. This means this month he got paid less than he has ever got since university. We've cut down as much as possibly this month but we've got 2 weeks until Payday and £25 to get food.

Ds turns one tomorrow and I know he's getting at least £50 (been told by various relatives) wibu to use this money for food shopping etc? Would definately pay this back with dhs bonus in Oct (will be getting a large amount). Dh thinks we'll be being unreasonable to use it, even though he'll be getting it back. I think that we need to eat and that a 1 year old doesn't know what's happening.

Aibu and has anyone else done this? I'm feeling awful that I'm even thinking about it.

[butisthismyname]

I won't flame you as have done this so many times . As long as you pay it back, I think it's fine. You need to eat.

[OldLadyKnowsNothing]

Do it. No point starving yourselves, how does that benefit your child?

[cozietoesie]

Don't feel awful - just use it and pay it back once you're stable again.

[nickelcognito]

claim it's board and lodgings

seriously, though - use it but pay it back straight away,.

[sugarice]

Go for it, he'll never know.

[NettOlympicSuperstar]

I borrowed my 11yo's birthday money, she said it was fine, I'll give it back in time to take her shopping, which is what she wants to do with it.

[ErikNorseman]

Of course YANBU! He's one year old. Take it, open him a bank account and pay £5 a month into it for the next year. He gains a tenner, bonus. No guilt. What else were you planning to do with the money?

[fryingpantoface]

Thank you. I tried pointing out that it's not for a night out, but for food. Dh just feels rubbish about the whole situation

[NettOlympicSuperstar]

DD's was £70 btw.

[Imnotaslimjim]

DNBU. I'd do it too, if it was needed!

[fryingpantoface]

We're moving at the beginning of next year, so it would only have gone into savings until we moved and he would get toys or books or something

[valiumredhead]

God I do this all the time - don't feel bad for goodness sake! x

[cozietoesie]

DH will be feeling rubbish about the whole situation of your finances as a family. It's just coming out on this birthday issue. Go ahead and buy food.

[StaceymReadyForNumber3]

Do it. As lOng as u pay it back it's no problem!

I've borrowed dd's money to buy takeaway when I've suddenly realised me and DH had no cash!!

[DeWe]

I think it's very sensible. I usually borrow from dd1 who has more money than is sensible squirrelled away in her room. If you feel guilty pay £55 back, that's very good interest rate; luckily dd1 hasn't discovered interest yet

The only thing is, don't think "I have £50 to spend so I'll buy this little treat, and that little extra etc." and find that it's all gone too soon.
I had a friend who would do this, feel desperate, borrow enough money and be so relieved she was okay she'd find she had spent it all in the first week on getting a take away for a treat, and then "just" a DVD to watch, and the children haven't had a comic for months, and "the dc have asked for ages for one of those..." and then by week 2 she'd be desperate again.

[DontmindifIdo]

Talk to DH about it, that you aren't taking the money, just borrowing it, and you will both make sure it's the first thing that's paid back.

[BettySwollocksandaCrustyRack]

Yep as long as you pay it back when you are able to.......be silly to starve when you can make life a tiny bit easier for now.

[MrsKeithRichards]

I do this all the time! In fact gutted I don't have the ability to transfer out of his savings on line, only in!

His savings tin has paid for many a Chinese as yellow

[MrsKeithRichards]

Yellow?

Well!

[HeadfirstForHalos]

We've done it loads of times, I know all of my friends have done it too! The only time you should feel guilty is if you have no intention of putting it back. No harm will be done.

[korvonia]

I would just use it and not think too much about it. I have used dds' birthday money for essential clothing etc, and would not hesitate to use money for food if I was as strapped for cash as you are at the moment. My grannie once told me she didn't care what I spent the money on - even if it was on the gas bill. Make a note of it and pay it back if you can. But if you can't, do not stress. Your baby needs happy parents more than anything else in the world.

[fryingpantoface]

Thank you all. I've shown Dh this thread and we both feel better about this decision.

I fucking love mumsnet

[NervousAt20]

YANBU, you need to eat and no one will ever know just make sure you pay it back

[UserNameNotAvailable]

YANBU - done it myself plenty of times.

I must admit I'm pretty shocked no one has had a cats bum mouth yet though.