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AIBU?

to not pay.

93 replies

Justme23 · 25/08/2012 14:53

AIBU to refuse to pay for my SILs rear car seat to be cleaned after I spilled a KFC crushem all over it even though she had expressly said NO FOOD AND DRINK IN HER CAR!

As you can tell this is a reverse AIBU.

On my day off last week I had offered to take DPs niece to a bridesmaid dress fitting ( she stays with us Friday till Monday anyway and is treated like one of ours).

Last minute the night before SIL rings up pleading me to pick her up because she wants to go with her daughter to the fitting. I said fine but she can pay deisel for the hour and a half driving to hers and back out of my way because she will not get a train.

On the way she badgers me to stop at a macdonalds and i say no, thst i dont allow eating and drinking in my car. Aside from its value alone and the fact it is only 2 years old, I am a neat freak and I use it for work and sometimes have important people in my car.

In the end we get there and at the point of paying the deposit on the dress SIL has magically disappeared (oh surprise). I pay it, I don't mind, it's not astronomical.

When we get back to the car we find SIL stuffing her face with KFC and I notice her drink is horizontal and the back of my car is covered in black and cream sludge.

She starts apologising to which I answer " look it's fine, I'll put it into the cleaners and I'll invoice you the cost tommorow".

Well I gave the bill (£60) in a sealed envelope to her dd to give on Monday and mil just rang to say SIL has been getting on at her all week.
I said I would sort it out with SIL tommorow.

Am I really being that unreasonable?

OP posts:
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lunchbox · 25/08/2012 14:56

No, you told her no food or drink, and if you have her dd every weekend for her, don't see how she can refuse to pay.

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ChaosTrulyReigns · 25/08/2012 14:56

Which flavour was it?

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skyebluesapphire · 25/08/2012 14:56

If you expressly told her that no food and drink were to be had in the car then No, YANBU in my opinion.

£60 does seem a lot though to clean a seat. But I never get mine valeted so have no idea of the cost

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Sparklingbrook · 25/08/2012 14:56

I am a bit lost. Confused

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changeforthebetter · 25/08/2012 14:56

YANBU though you sound a bit OTT about cleaning

You are perfectly entitled to keep your car nice (you would probably faint if you saw mine Wink

I don't think you'll get the money though!

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Marrow · 25/08/2012 14:57

YANBU. You made it very clear that you didn't allow food in the car. Why did she have to get in it to eat it? She sounds dreadful.

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changeforthebetter · 25/08/2012 14:57

Oh and your SIL is BU for eating KFC food

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Sparklingbrook · 25/08/2012 14:58

Why did she disappear to KFC when she wanted to go to the fitting?

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Sparklingbrook · 25/08/2012 14:59

Did you give her the keys to your car?

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pictish · 25/08/2012 14:59

£60 to clean a seat? I'd laugh at that tbh. What's wrong with a cloth and a basin of soapy water?
Sorry but if you want to pay silly money for easy jobs I would say that's your own look out.
I would not hand over £60. No way!

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LadyInPink · 25/08/2012 14:59

To me it's not unreasonable of you to ask her to pay for it to be cleaned - is it really £60 to clean one seat? You expressly asked for NO food or drink and she dismissed your instructions so she should cough up.

I don't however understand about her 'being on at MIL all week' can you explain that part please?

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HappySunflower · 25/08/2012 15:00

No,you're not being unreasonable.
However, £60 sounds like a lot of money.
Could she not have just washed it with hot soapy water?
Getting it valet cleaned seems a bit unnecessary. If it were vomit/milk then I'd understand why you did that.

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Thumbwitch · 25/08/2012 15:00

YANBU but I also doubt you'll get the money, or the money for the dress either.

She was being rather pathetic to get a takeaway to eat in the back of your car, when you had expressly said that you didn't allow food or drink in it, she could have sat outside and not risked your car or been so disrespectful.

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TigerStripe · 25/08/2012 15:01

60 quid to clean a seat? Are you have a laugh?? You can get a full, professional valet of the whole car for about that, so imo it is completely over the top to give your SIL a bill for the whole amount. I am not surprised she is kicking off, but she should actually be kicking off at you, not your mother.

She was BU to take food & drink in your car when you had expressly asked her not to. You are BU to expect her to pay anywhere like that amount.

And agree with changeforthebetter, KFC is rank.

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StuntGirl · 25/08/2012 15:01

Krushems are milkshakes aren't they sunflower?

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Ithinkitsjustme · 25/08/2012 15:02

I don't think you are being unreasonable to say no food or drink in your car, but I DO think you are being unreasonable to "let" them eat in your car and then bill them for an accident. How did they get into your car unless you gave them a key? I also think you might be whistling for your money.

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OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos · 25/08/2012 15:03

YABU for making a very simple dilemma sound like a very complicated one.

YANBU to expect your sil to pay. It's your car, it's up to you if it gets cleaned with a bowl of soap and water or professionally. If she didn't want to risk paying that much then she shouldn't have taken something messy into your car.

Sibu anyway, KFC is minging.

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nickelcognito · 25/08/2012 15:03

crushems are milk, Happy

it's like icecream, with chocolate,

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MadamFolly · 25/08/2012 15:07

Have you got the money back for the dress deposit either?

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Merrylegs · 25/08/2012 15:08

I would love to have my dustbin of a car valeted so YANBU for that, but I wonder, does your SIL lead a v chaotic life, or does she find things difficult in general? I only ask because you say you have DN every weekend and the insisting on KFC and then spilling it seems a little unusual. Does she have much money? Could you go halves?

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LoopyLoopsOlympicHoops · 25/08/2012 15:08

Confused about how she got in the car. Also, why do you look after her child every weekend? She sounds difficult, to say the least.

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HappySunflower · 25/08/2012 15:12

Oh, those yucky things-thanks for clarifying!
In that case, then yes, I totally understand why the seat needed to be professionally cleaned. getting the smell of milk out of a car is near impossible in my experience!
£60 still seems extortionate though.

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OldLadyKnowsNothing · 25/08/2012 15:12

Krushems; think milkshake plus sweeties and cake, all in one drrink.

Yeah, that would take some cleaning!

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brighthair · 25/08/2012 15:14

£60 seems a lot. It's £15 here to have the inside cleaned
I get why you want it doing though, and I'd have it done professionally rather than do it myself as its milk, and it will stink

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pictish · 25/08/2012 15:16

I could clean a Krushem off a car seat for free. No problem.

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