To be relieved that someone else is obviously as slatternly as I am (knicker related)(38 Posts)
You know when you rush out of the house wearing yesterday's jeans and then wonder if you've put them on with yesterday's knickers inside because there's a suspicious bump which might be slipping its way down one leg?
No? Obviously not as slatternly as me, then but if it's 'yes' read on...
We were at a big event with dd at the weekend. We were going in and out of a hall where the event was held throughout the day. and my heart sank when I saw knickers in the middle of the floor which looked very like one of my best pairs. Earlier on, I'd felt that suspicious bump in the leg which I'd ignored.
Anyway, on spotting the knickers-which-might-have-been-mine, I had to decide, and quick, whether to:
a) surreptitously pick them up
b) kick them to one side and maybe pick them up later
c) ignore them
I did c), and then confessed to dd and dh later that evening (who'd walked out after me and seen them, as would everyone who'd walked past) that I thought they were mine.
Dd helpfully pointed out I'd probably been caught on CCTV with the aforesaid undergarments dropping out around my foot.
Anyway, I looked in my sports bag this evening, and the knickers were there! So, someone else is as slatternly as I am, and I'm delighted. Also, I didn't stoop to pick up another minger's knickers.
When I get changed into my swimwear I make sure I put my knickers in my trouser pocket and button it down because TWICE I've dropped my knickers on a campsite on my way to the shower block. One time a group of people were taking the piss out this forlorn pair of knickers laying on the grass and my 16 year old s elfcould only feign ignorance and join in.
There is also a high chance of one of the kids digging through the bag and pulling my undies out so all the more reason to hide my knickers.
Yes, I have been pondering the bump I thought I felt.
The thing is, without checking, you never know if it's your imagination...a bit like wondering (tmi coming up) if you actually did put that tampon in or not and having to find a loo to check. Usually it's all in place.
Because I've done the knicker-in-jeans thing a few times (but discovered it before embarrassment), I now think i'm transporting a spare when I'm not.
At least, that's my story. Only the CCTV would tell, and I'm not about to ask for it under data protection.
Just rememebered another one (am careless me)
Quite a few years ago I was staying at my Aunties for a few nights, as were my Grandparents. When I got there I went upstairs to 'unpack' (My cousin was about 5 at the time and was super excited that I was staying in his room, and wanted to show me where I could put my stuff)
Anyway, the dog wandered in the room, decided nothing was happening, and wandered off again. When I finally persuaded my cousin I knew where everything was, and went downstairs my Gramps handed me a very tiny thong (I think it said sexy bitch or similar on) said 'the dog bought this down, I think it's yours' then made an excuse to go upstairs. I'm not sure who was more embarassed!
Hubby was doing the weekly shop at the supermarket one busy saturday morning and the checkout lad was helping help him pack with our 'bags for life', the lad suddenly pulled out a pair of my red lacy knickers out of the bag with much hilarity and joshing until hubby whispered that they were probably not clean , he then dropped them pretty fast! The moral is don't store your shopping bags in the hall where you throw the washing downstairs!
and i have done this, on the way to the launderette fortunately, although i had crossed a busy road withthem probably hanging outof thebottom of my jeans,
then i just had to scoop into the rest of the dirty washing.
are you sure you didnt have two pairs op?
Never done this as I am of the strange breed who usually sleeps in pants.
But if I don´t, I take trousers/jeans & pants off seperately.
Great thread... I'm alternately and and
But Mamhaf .... if they weren't your knicks, what was the "suspicious bump" you'd felt on your leg earlier in the evening ??!!
When I was 12, I was in school one day and we started to notice a used sanitary towel creeping its way out of the teacher's jeans pocket. It didn't fall all the way out as it was half stuck to her leg. One of the girls went up and whispered it to her and she jumped up and started shouting at us all "Who put that there"
Then she ran out of the room to sort herself out. We had no sympathy though...she used to sit on on of the girls desks while reading, pick her nose and rub it under the desk
Not quite the same, but once as a student I was cycling home from sports practice wearing small lycra shorts (those were the days) and had to stop suddenly when some
pillock one pulled out in front of me. I came off the saddle and smash into the cross bar (ouch!). Legs a bit sore, but never mind, I think.
Stopped off at Tesco to pick something up and noticed a few people looking at my oddly - figured it was because I was in gym kit and looked a bit scuzzy. Then a lovely little old lady finally plucked up the courage to whisper, 'My dear, I think you're having ladies' troubles'.
Looked down and the inside of my thigh was covered in blood from scraping on bike! I'd been walking all around the supermarket apparently freely menstruating!!
The days I go swimming I put my cossie half on under my jeans and pull it on the rest of the way when I'm in the changing room at the pool.
The other day when I did this I found that one cup seemed to be bigger and lumpier than the other. On investigation I found a large handkerchief had insinuated itself into the lining at some point in the washing cycle.
Not ever had that knicker problem though. But when I was in my late teens my mum once handed me a pair of mine that she'd found on the sitting room floor one morning
This is a great thread!! Nothing lke this has ever happened to me (god knows how!!!) but now I'm wondering if this is where all the random socks that lie about in the street come from haha!
Mine happened to a colleague of mine who was "in TV" earlier in her career. It was back in the day when you got those plastic bubbles to put your washing powder right into the centre of your wash.
She had a glamorous top that was of the wash, shake and wear variety that she loved to wear for fancy minor show biz events.
In a hurry one evening she glammed up, grabbed the aforementioned top, pulled it on and rushed out the door.
It wasn't until she was at the event that a fellow lovey hugged her and grabbed the odd hump sticking out of her shoulder. You guessed it! The washing powder bubble was stuck inside her top and bulging out the back of her shoulder.
Luckily she has a great sense of humour and laughed it off
When I was about 17 my friend had a dinner party at her house (we thought we were incredibly sophisticated!). Her dad was greeting people at the door and as I arrived I handed him a bottle of wine from my bag of stuff that I had brought to stay over for the night. Unfortunately, somehow my knickers (clean thank god!) had wrapped themselves around the neck of the bottle, and I only realised a few seconds too late, when he was stood holding the bottle open mouthed! It was quite possibly the most embarrassing moment of my life! This is the same dad that I once accidentally tried to get in bed with when we arrived back to my mate's house very drunk.
Apparently he was telling the story to anyone who would listen years later!
i once pulled my sons coat out of the tumble dryer and gave it to him to wear just as we were about to leave the house for the walk to school
Once we were in the playground my DD asked DS what was on his coat..... it was a pair of my nice, lacy undies that had stuck to the velcro fastening on his coat
slutty black thong
Promiscuous undergarments?! Whatever next
The only thing I've done is had a sock in a cardi arm which I didn't notice for most of the day. It's a tight fitting cardi too, in my defence I was ill.
I have a bad cough at the moment and this thread has nearly finished me off I've been laughing so hard!
I was told a story by one of my australian friends. Her friend, who works in real estate, had a meeting with various contractors, builders, plumbers etc. She'd woken late, dressed quickly and just got there in time. So they're all outside, on the plot they're going to build on, having their meeting, and she can feel something creeping down her leg. She freaks out thinking it's a spider or similar, grabs the arm of the man next to her and tells him there's a big spider crawling down her leg. One of them gets ready with a piece of pipe, and they wait for the spider to make it's descent. It hits the floor, she leaps out of the way and this guy clobbers it. She then realises it was the slutty black thong she'd been wearing the evening before!
This thread has made me pmsl-I'll add mine, Was wandering round Blockbusters choosing our Saturday night film (so store packed) when I noticed a sock on the floor, I thought ooooh hubby has a sock just like that!! I then noticed this bloke smirking at me & realised with horror that it was my hubbys I'd picked up my top off the clean washing pile & the offending sock must have been stuck to it-anyway I just left it there of course but was amazed at the amount of my friends this had happened to with various bits of undies!! Still makes me laugh until I cry thinking back on it now & it happened about 6 years ago
i feel your pain. similar thing happens to me with socks
all the time on occasion...
Same thing happened to my friend when we were 14, walking down the street and out falls a pair of knickers. I allways take pants out at night now to make sure it never happens to me (14 years on)
He did giraffes. Not sure if that was because of or despite my knickers making an impromptu appearance.
fire did he get in?
Mr Palooza works in event management and has to work some really high class, A list events.
One evening he was walking down the plush carpeted, beautifully decorated corridor of a very prestigious venue in central London which may or may not have been a royal residence, pushing a heavy trolley. He had to put all of his effort into pushing it, with most of the pushing coming from his legs. He took the trolley to its destination then went back down the same fancy corridor.
A few metres along he noticed a pair of
very slutty, red satin and lace ladies undercrackers on the floor...
They were mine
They had fallen out of his trouser leg.
LUCKILY they were clean and must have got caught in his trouser leg in the tumble dryer.
We are both ironing slatterns, so he had put the trousers on straight from the dryer. Well, that's his story and he's sticking to it...
He spent the rest of his shift alternating between having a boner and cringing at the thought of my knickers dropping out of his trousers when someone else was watching.
Worra...EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. And boak.
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