AIBU to take the full time nursery places?

[CoffeeDog]

Just had a letter that have said the twins have been offered full time nursery placements in September (they were 3 in dec and currentley go p/t 15hr a week) The Nursery id fab and is massivley over subscribed the DT only just got in despite being december babies.

A little smug mummy-ish but they are bright little lads they know number shapes colours animals and love learning new things - they dont care if its great grandpa telling them about steam engines or their big sister teaching them the names/attacks of pokemon. They are hard work as Everything is why mummy what is /what if... I dont get any family help with childcare.

My friends little girl also goes to nursey with the DT but is a little older and started back in september - she has not been offered a full time place. My friend has said she will be 'having a word' with the office as its not fair as she works and could do with her DD being at nursery 9-2 m-f (free as gov funded) and i should think about leaving the twins pt to make room for those who have to work.

When we go there today there will be at least 30 kids that didnt get the coverted ft placements and will remain pt- Some of the parents work - I don't (DH does) there will be a big hooha about what selection process etc were used and i expect more than 1 mum/dad to suguest i dont take the 2 ft places for the twins as i am 'at home all day'

AIBU to take the places

[FoxyRoxy]

Why is it up to you to provide full time care for other peoples kids at your own dt's detriment? I assume there are other nurseries and forms of childcare in your area? Yanbu.

[WorraLiberty]

Tell them to take it up with the Nursery as you don't make the rules.

[OhTheConfusion]

No, YANBU. Perhaps you would like to work but the potential childcare costs for DT's put's you off?

You should not be punished for having twins and recieving the offer. I would take it.

[Foxy800]

Personally I think it is not the business of anyone else, I can inderstand how they will be feeling but at the end of the day you didnt insist they gave you two full time spaces. THey offered them to you, u dont have to take them but you have to do what is best for you and your children.

[Ciske]

Normally I'd say YANBU as it's clearly an oversubscribed nursery and the parents missing out should have prepared better, and made sure they had alternative arrangements in place.

But the smug paragraph about how bright the twins are, which has nothing to do with the issue, makes me side with your friend.

[EauDeLaPoisson]

Why would you want/need to put your kids in nursery full time if you don't work? YABU and I am inclined to agree with your 'friend'

[Foxy800]

That should say understand!!!

As a previous poster said tell them to take it up with the nursery. YOu dont make the rules and why should your children miss out on this opportunity.

[EauDeLaPoisson]

Wasn't aware a three year old knowing shapes colours and numbers was anything other than average tbh...

[PattiMayor]

What's your children being bright got to do with anything?

[PattiMayor]

And what Poisson said

[CoffeeDog]

Sorry about the smugish-bit it was just off the bat from yesterday when one of the TA said it to me.... is is a bit twatish sorry

I would also like to add i have actually caught them both eating playdough and on the verge of eating worm's so i dont think they are mensa material or anything. They are just MY boys and i want them to be happy.

[mrsjay]

cant imagine having twins must be mummy mummy in stereo Can you maybe get some full days and half days or 3 full days ? would be better than f/t but it really is up to you if they go ft or not and dont worry what others say or feel guilty about other children not getting places that isnt your concern really ,

[PattiMayor]

Fair enough :o

If you want the places, then I would take them.

[EauDeLaPoisson]

No it's not her concern and she didn't make the nursery give her full time but I really would feel guilty if me taking a full time place i really didn't need interfered with those who need those hours to work and put a roof over their head

[givemeaclue]

why do you want them to go ft to nursery if you are 'at home all day' - presumably you will have to pay for that as only the 15 hours per child per week will be free?

[CoffeeDog]

I do want the place's - Even though i will also have to factor in 'dinner money' at £2 each a day -£80 a month no pack lunch as they all sit around tables and eat propperly.

My DD went there after a horrid time at a private nursery - she came out a confiendent happy little girl who couldn't wait to get to school.

[WorraLiberty]

No it's not her concern and she didn't make the nursery give her full time but I really would feel guilty if me taking a full time place i really didn't need interfered with those who need those hours to work and put a roof over their head

Fair point but then other people's child care arrangements (or lack of them) is nothing to do with the OP.

Nursery/School admissions are a law unto themselves and always have been...but I don't think priority should be given to the children of working parents because schooling is all about the children.

[IUseTooMuchKitchenRoll]

The way the places are allocated is nothing to do with you, so you haveno reason to feel guilty about using them if you want to.

You don't even know that if you gave up your spaces they would be given to those who work full time, so giving up your space may well not help anyone anyway.

Why do you want your children in full time nursery when you're at home all day? Do you think you will use the places to give your twins some time away from each other and some one on one time with Mummy each? If you are going to do that, I would say you are more deserving of the places than full time workers anyway.

[CoffeeDog]

The nursery is gov funded - so there is no fee's :) they will go mon-fri 9-2

Hence why it is so massivley over subscribed.

[WorraLiberty]

no pack lunch as they all sit around tables and eat propperly

???

Do you think kids with packed lunches sit on the floor and throw food at each other or something?

[EauDeLaPoisson]

This is going to sound judgey but meh- why would you want your kids out at nursery full time when you don't even work? Why not enjoy the time you have with them before they start the next 12 years enforced full time schooling?

[EauDeLaPoisson]

So the taxpaying public are enabling your kids to go to full time nursery while those who work and pay tax don't get the hours they need?

[CoffeeDog]

Sorry abot the pack lunch thing - I really am not thinking to well today one of the twins decided to start the day a 5am.

All i ment is that they will get a hot a dinner everyday, and have a special ares where they eat it.

I am distracted by the DT having raided the kitchen are both walking around with cereal boxes on their heads singing we are ants tra lalalala

[givemeaclue]

still don't understand why you want them to go to nursery 5 hours per day when you don't work - is it just you want to put your feet up for 25 hours per week? would hte 15 hours you already have not be a better balance?

[CoffeeDog]

My husband works full time and pays Tax. I worked up untill 4 days before the twins were born.

We couldnt find away of paying for full time nursery + wrap around care for my DD on the money i was earning. We have NO family help what so ever and i also have elderly parents with health concerns that wont see them around too much longer.
When the boys are at school i intend to go back to work - In fact i am looking forward to it.