EX P and CSA (bit long, sorry)

[QuestionsQuestions123]

Name changed for this, so as not to be outed. This is on behalf of my partner as I've told him the MN "massive" are a wealth of all knowledge on all things child related :)

I'd like to point out he was well seperated when we met, so I have had no part to play in them breaking up or anything similar.

Brief background:

He has young daughters who live with him. His EX P moved out and lives with a friend and has been for some time. They both own the house he is living in with the children. She cannot have the kids at her friends house (no space) so she will only look after them at the jointly owned house in the daytimes when she is off work. She has them overnight either 1 or 2 nights a fortnight (this varies) however, she will only have them in the jointly owned house so he has to go and stay elsewhere. She pays him money each month "maintenance" for the kids for their food and clothes etc. He pays for all the childcare, the mortgage and all the bills.

He is now thinking of putting the maintenance payments through CSA. Things are very up and down and frosty between them at the best of times and she wants to pay as little as possible. He is also considering applying for a residency order. He will allow her as much access as she wants though of course, he has been actively encouraging her to have them more. He hopes going through the CSA will reduce arguments or potential problems in the future if she starts trying to make things difficult.

So, AIBU (or shall I say is he BU) to think that involving the CSA and recieving the money that way will strengthen his case for obtaining a residency order? Also, because the children are living with him 100% of the time and the children always stay there will CSA expect her to pay money towards the mortgage costs? How does this affect the payments?

Any advice greatly appreciated, he just wants what's best and easiest for everyone involved (especially the children) and unfortunately I have no experience of all this so can't help - hopefully someone here may have some advice / been in a similar position.

Thank you!

[WorraLiberty]

I think he'll need to take legal advice re the mortgage situation.

As far as I'm aware, the CSA won't get involved in disputes over jointly owned properties.

Actually, if he rang the mortgage company I'm sure they would give him helpful information as they must deal with this sort of thing all the time.

[CharShep]

I would defo tell him to go for the residency and through the CSA if things are up and down between them. It may cause some friction to start with but at least everyone will know where they stand and what their responsibilities are. Also a residency will give a little more long term security (in terms of everyone knowing that where they live is long term etc) for him and his children.

[sunshineandbooks]

If he can avoid using the CSA or going to court, I would advise him to TBH. Things can get heated and quickly spiral out of control. I understand his need to try to formalise everything but unless his XP is trying to thwart him, it isn't strictly necessary and may damage their co-parenting relationship. He can use the CSA website to determine whether or not his XP is offering a reasonable amount. If she's taking the mickey with her offer, then he may have no choice of course.

There isn't a link between residency and maintenance. If the DC are living with your DP anyway, there wouldn't be any need for him to bring maintenance into it. Judges tend to favour the status quo, and as long as your DP can demonstrate that the DC are well cared for and happy, I can't see a judge deciding to hand them over to the mum if a residency battle ensued, especially as she hasn't been having them outside their normal home anyway. Is she going to try to assume residency do you think?

Unless there are other issues going on between your DP and his X, I'd say leave it as it is TBH. My split with my X was very acrimonious (due to abuse) and he is only allowed supervised contact, but I still don't have a residency order as such.

[QuestionsQuestions123]

Thanks all for your advice so far! So am I right in thinking that he isn't any more likely to be granted a residency order because things are being done through CSA. We thought perhaps being able to prove she pays him maintenance in turn proves he has had residency in case this is bought into question.

Any other advice surrounding this issue is appreciated.

[WTAF]

When I went to court re DS, maintenance wasn't even mentioned. Access and maintenance are two wholly separate issues, so no, I am pretty certain the CSA dealing with the maintenance will have zero effect on a residency order.

I have a residency order for DS, mainly because ex lives quite far away and him 'snatching' DS was a risk I wasn't prepared to take. I wanted it in place so that if he ever were to take him, I'd have legal grounds to get him back ASAP, police if necessary. As it is he hasn't bothered to see DS (or pay any money for that matter) since August. I doubt he would actually want DS full time - it would cramp his style - I was more worried that he would do it to spite me. In court he contested it but I was granted it with no discussion from the judge at all :)

I was told though, by my solicitor, that even without a residency order, should he take DS I could apply to the court for an emergency order to have him returned, it just might take a few days longer. As I could obviously prove that DS lived with me, I am main carer etc, he would be returned to me anyway. That's just what I was told though. He should probably get some legal advice. Ex and I weren't married either and had no joint property, so was a bit simpler.

[AnitaBlake]

For the CSA, receiving the child benefit is taken as prook of being the 'parent with care'. The other party is described as the 'non-resident parent'. The CSA calculator can give you an idea what is fair.

Until the calculation changes she should be paying 15% of her net income for one child, 20% for two children and 25% for three or more. I would imagine since she is using his home for staying contact that reductions for overnights wouldn't really be appropriate as she'll be using all his facilities to do this.