To feel completely lost.

[hanaka88]

DS has autism. He is in a mainstream school (panel meeting today about him going to a special school)
Anyway he has severely challenging behaviour and school decided to put him on half days.
I picked DS up at dinner time and put him in his SN buggy. DS said 'oo my thumb hurts' I kissed it better and carried on home. When I got home I realised he couldn't hold his fork and he started really crying, asked him to make a fist and he couldn't.

So after this I called a taxi to take us to A&E and phoned school to see if they could tell me what happened. No they didn't know he had hurt his thumb. Ok.

I took him to A&E and turned out he had fractured it.

I phoned school today to find out if he was safe there if they didn't notice what happened (to be fair DS throws himself about a lot) and they just said they didn't notice and wouldn't say he did or didn't do it in school. He then went on to say DS would probably be excluded on monday when he goes full time again anyway.

I don't want to send him back, this is the last in a long line of things that I am not happy with (them talking to him badly, bandages being soaked in wee and not noticed, being sent home covered in poo, injuries gone un noticed etc)

Would I be unreasonable to not take him back? What are the legal things around this?

[OldGreyWassailTest]

I don't know the legalities of these things, but I do know about having a child with autism/Aspergers. My son was not treated well in mainstream and I kicked and shouted until I got him into a Special School for his needs. Don't sit around waiting for a decision from the Panel, phone them and get a reply. I would never have kept my son in mainstream as the treatment he received was appalling.

The main people to get you the right school is, actually, the current school - if they say they can't cope I found the Panel listened more to them than to me.

Fingers crossed for you. And I wouldn't send him back, using the thumb as a 'reason' for now.

[NewsClippings]

Can you phone the LEA and tell them of your concerns?

[MrsDanverclone]

If you are not happy with that school, do not send him back.

I withdrew my daughter from school for a number of months, school by their own admission couldn't cope with her but the HT told me to bring her in, never mind the fact she was severely depressed/suicidal, at least she was in the classroom.

For us, I was 'lucky' that her absence could be covered by health grounds, but it also forced the issue of her education and by standing our ground, we were able to get the education my daughter wanted/needed.

If you feel your son will be better off out of mainstream education, then fight for that. The present school is failing in their duty of care for him at the moment, if he is returning home soaked in urine, covered in faeces and injuries are going unnoticed and maybe unreported.

Decide what is best for your son, use the panel meeting to try and get it, but I wouldn't be sending my child back to a school that I couldn't trust to take care of his well being, as well as his education.

[hanaka88]

Thank you danver I could use his fracture to say he can't go in just in case he knocks it again. Hold out for the panel decision maybe? He has a very good case as the head has emailed panel saying he needs a new placement urgently.

[MrsDanverclone]

Yes I would use his fracture as the reason. Sounds as though school would be supportive and back you up in the need to get him a Special school placement, if that is what you want. You need to decide what is best for your child, unfortunately, sometimes you have to fight to get it, but don't accept something that will be detrimental to his health.
Good luck with the panel meeting.

[hanaka88]

Well apparently it has to be investigated by SS as an unexplained injury as school didn't notice.