This is my first AIBU - please be gentle with me! I've namechanged for this as I don't want to out myself....
DH and I are expecting our first baby in a couple of weeks. We don't have pets, and we've just had our pale carpets cleaned and the house redecorated. PIL have a small dog which she says becomes very stressed and anxious (diarrhoea and vomiting) when he is separated from MIL- to such an extent that she refuses to leave the dog in the car even if she's just popping into the shops. I am adamant I don't want dogs in my house. Several of my friends have dogs but they've always understood that I don't want their dogs in my house, and have made alternative arrangements when they come around to visit. PIL's dog isn't reliably continent, especially in stressful situations, which I would imagine coming to a new house would be for him. He's also not been castrated so there is a good risk he will mark in the house. The house is small and it's going to be a squeeze with visitors anyway, without the addition of a dog (although he is small). The other thing is that he's not ever met any babies before, and it's entirely possible that given he's so worried when separated from MIL he will be jealous, and I don't know how he will react to a baby.
I've said I don't want the dog in the house when they come to visit. They say they can't leave him anywhere because he becomes just too stressed with anyone else. I am very worried that we're going to reach an impasse when the baby arrives that I don't want the dog here, and they'll say that I'm being massively unreasonable and stopping them from visiting their grandchild. I don't want to stop them from seeing their grandchild but I don't see why I should be the one to compromise given that it's my home. I also don't want to spend the whole time they're here on edge watching the dog's every move.
So, am I being ridiculous? FWIW, I've felt like this about the dog coming for years anyway, so it's not just PFB (although there probably is a bit of that here as well....) Also, does anyone have any ideas of a compromise that could be made that everyone would be happy with? Really appreciate your help - this is stressing me out.
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AIBU?
In-laws dog when they come to visit the new baby
60 replies
AlreadyStressed · 01/08/2011 17:31
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