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AIBU?

To be Disturbed by this woman in a Burka? ......

1001 replies

Gingefringe · 11/04/2011 16:45

I saw a very strange event in Debenhams make-up counter this week-end which on reflection, I found very disturbing.
A woman in a full burka (including her eyes covered in thin veil) came up to the make-up counter with a man (presumably DH). The man then proceeded to ask about foundation for the woman and had a conversation with the sales assistant which rarely included the woman at all (apart from trying on a sample colour on her hand).
I felt so sorry for the poor woman - not only to be forced to wear this ridiculous veil but she wasn't allowed even to chose her own make-up!
I did give the man my best evil looks but he didn't seem to notice - perhaps because I was a woman!! I was too cowardly to say anything.
On the day that France bans the burka I wonder whether you would have said anything?

OP posts:
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squeakytoy · 11/04/2011 16:47

She may not have spoken English. Why on earth would you give him evil looks? She may be happy to wear the full burka, many women who do so are.

She obviously wears make-up in the privacy of her own home, and has told her husband what he needs to ask the assistant.

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Dropdeadfred · 11/04/2011 16:47

Nothing to do with you... Lots of women choose to wear the Butkus nut enjoy wearing nice clothes and makeup at home when with their husband and close family

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Dropdeadfred · 11/04/2011 16:48

Apologies for stupid corrective text from iphone

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Loonytoonie · 11/04/2011 16:48

Prob didn't speak English OP?

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jesuswhatnext · 11/04/2011 16:49

how do you know she was being forced to wear it?, did she speak english? or was her husband being kind and helpful and interpreting and asking for what she wanted?

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SoupDragon · 11/04/2011 16:49

I think the evil looks were over the top and out of order.

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peanutbutterkid · 11/04/2011 16:49

I think that you presume too much and know too little. She may even enjoy being taken care of like that. I don't like to see the full burkha, either, but nothing especially odd about this scene.

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BleachedWhale · 11/04/2011 16:50

You make a lot of assumptions there, so yes, YABU.

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TheVisitor · 11/04/2011 16:50

I think it's absolutely none of your business whatsoever.

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justpaddling · 11/04/2011 16:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GwendolineMaryLacey · 11/04/2011 16:52

I'm obviously not attentive enough as I go about my business. I can't imagine even noticing never mind giving out evils.

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jesuswhatnext · 11/04/2011 16:52

ime a lot of women who cover up like this have the most fantastic wardrobe of designer clothes that they enjoy wearing in the privacy of their homes, have you never seen the ladies in selfridges and harrods - why on earth would they buy all that stuff if they wernt then allowed to wear it? Hmm and as for giving him 'evils', he proberbly thought you were an ignorant racist and ignored you!

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LDNmummy · 11/04/2011 16:55

You are making a lot of ignorant assumptions. Many of these women wear gorgeous designer clothes under their burka which is taken off once indoors so not all is what it seems. Its a different culture, get off your eurocentric high horse.

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mumoverseas · 11/04/2011 16:59
  1. How do you know she was forced to wear it and it was not personal choice for religious reasons
  2. Do you know whether she spoke english? Perhaps her husband was being helpful.

    Live and let live
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amothersplaceisinthewrong · 11/04/2011 16:59

I certainly would not have said anything - none of my business.

However, if I were a shop assistant I really would not want to servie someone whose face i couldn't see - part of OUR CULTURE is that we don't cover up.

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GothAnneGeddes · 11/04/2011 17:02

YABU and mean. Giving evils to a stranger?! Don't you realise it's attitudes like yours that make burqa wearers want to stay indoors.

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squeakytoy · 11/04/2011 17:04

part of OUR CULTURE is that we don't cover up.

having seen the photos of the women at Aintree last week, its a damn shame... Grin

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FabbyChic · 11/04/2011 17:06

They have banned the wearing of these in France.

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YouaretooniceNOT · 11/04/2011 17:07

I was married to a Muslim man. He wanted me to wear a Burka too. I refused. The marriage was the most opressive experience of my life.

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BleachedWhale · 11/04/2011 17:15

I wouldn't cover up, I wouldn't marry or stay with anyone who tried to make me cover up. I would go to the police if I was threatened as a result of not agreeing to wear a burka.
But if our gvt introduces legislation criminalising women who choose to wear cloth over their head I shall take to wearing a burka in protest.
So will DH. (who is a muslim who believes that women should wear or not wear what they like)

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spongefingerssavedmylife · 11/04/2011 17:18

Ah, the we-are-so-fantastically-liberal-and-tolerant brigade are here. Never mind that OP was actually there and presumably able to tell if the man was kind and helpful or just wanted his wife to be made up for his eyes only.
'She may not have spoken English' - oh, well that's fine then, obviously not at all restrictive not to be able to speak with most people!
How odd that people who see someone in a Burka assume that they have a designer wardrobe. Statistically aren't they likely to be less wealthy than average?

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GothAnneGeddes · 11/04/2011 17:19

BleachedWhale - quite.

I am a Muslim woman and I wear more fabric then most, yet I still feel I am British thank you very much and I still believe it should be the choice of the individual.

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SauvignonBlanche · 11/04/2011 17:21

YABU - how do you know she was being 'forced' to wear it?

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GothAnneGeddes · 11/04/2011 17:23

SB - because she would never wear it, therefore no woman ever would choose to wear it. So goes that way of thinking.

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nijinsky · 11/04/2011 17:24

BleachedWhale your husband will wear a burka in protest? All the time, when he goes out of the house. Fair dos then. My main reason for finding them offensive to me as a woman, because of the connotations that go along with them, is that men don't wear them. If men wear them equally to women, I will drop any objections I have to them.

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