AIBU re work colleague and her sick "child"

[CaveMum]

Right, I've been on Mumsnet for a year or so now and finally feel brave enough for AIBU

On Friday one of my work colleagues announced that she would be leaving the office at lunchtime and not returning for the afternoon as her daughter was at home ill. Now before you jump on me I have to point out that said daughter is NINETEEN YEARS OLD and has a full-time job! She was not at deaths door (she had a bad cold) and does not have any underlying health issues.

Our boss did not have a problem with her leaving as she is normally very good about making up time (she works part-time) and to be fair he is very flexible with all of us if we need to pop out for appointments, etc.

I guess my real issue is AIBU to think it is weird that a parent would take time off work to look after their adult child?

Thoughts?

[dons flame retardant jacket]

[Lucyinthepie]

YANBU

[Firawla]

if its just a bad cold then yanbu, bit pathetic of the dd to ask/expect her mum to come. if it was a serious illness then could understand!

[devonsmummy]

No you ANBU thats taking the piss!

[bringonthegoat]

YANBU

My sole thought is PATHETIC.

She wanted an early away - end of!

[StealthPolarBear]

if it's as you say then yanbu but you don't know the full story. Think my mum took time off work to look after me when I had 'flu' at 18. I had meningitis - if she had been at work I'd be dead or brain damamged

[AtYourCervix]

left my sick 14 year old home alone today. she's hard though.

[MrsShrekTheThird]

neurotic mother imho. Bet it's her PFB

[ChristinedePizan]

Unless the daughter has a serious underlying condition then that's pathetic so YANBU

First AIBU is going to go well I think

[squeakytoy]

YANBU, and I too find it rather pathetic that a 19yr old cant cope with a cold...

[pozzled]

YANBU if you've heard the full story. But it seems so strange to me that I'm wondering if there is more to it- some reason for the mother to be concerned that she doesn't want to share with colleagues.

[carabos]

Yanbu. I have a colleague who still has "childcare" issues even though her daughter is almost 16. She leaves work early on days when there are no after school activities because otherwise she has to get a babysitter (what's weird about that is the daughter has a babysitting job herself at weekends)and if the girl is at home alone for any reason she rings up work and cries until mum goes home. She has no special needs, disabilities or other difficulties.

[Hulababy]

Suppose it depends on how ill the daughter was.

My mum had paid dependent's leave to help support me following my c section, as DH couldn't be there as much as I needed in the first couple of weeks. And when I was taken into hospital ill (not at death's door) she left work immediately to come to their hospital, despite DH also being there. Her work encouraged her to do so.

[Florin]

OMG YANBU that is just rediculous she shouldn't have been allowed time off. Maybe you could ask for time off as your cat needs to go for a manicure or something equally ridiculous!

[CaveMum]

Phew!

She (the daughter) is an only child. It was definitely nothing serious: when I asked my colleague how her daughter was this morning she said she had gone out drinking with her mates on Saturday night

[takes off jacket]

[FabbyChic]

Thats just ridiculous a reason to leave work early, and personally I doubt any large company would accept that as an acceptable excuse to leave work.

It's rubbish.

[TattyDevine]

Depends on the circumstances (though just read your drip feed update)

I once left work early to "look after" my husband - he'd been puking solidly for nearly 24 hours and the doctor had told him on the phone to get hold of something called "Buccastem M" which is an anti sickness drug.

So I went home in order to get these drugs for him and give them to him. He was so weak at this point he couldn't even fathom going downstairs for more Lucozade so was just lying there in a dehydrated heap, poor man!

It was bad though, it wasn't because he was a bloke, I got in a few days later and thought I was going to die! Or wished I could, at the time!

[bringonthegoat]

TSC - I will never stop caring for my child but I will expect her to cope with a cold alone pretty early on.

If my child or my dad were ill I would take time off to care for them - you support the ones you love. This thread isn't about that, it's about running off home to 'baby' an adult 'child'.

[KatieWatie]

She could at least have had the decency to come up with a better excuse for an early flyer rather than insulting everyone's intelligence!

[LittleB]

Theres a bloke who works with my dh who goes home to look after his wife when shes ill, she had a headache the other day so he went home early. We know them and theres no underlying issues, she just wants him at home. He has to make up the hours some other time.

[CaveMum]

We are small company - me and 4 others.

I have worked for the company for 9 years so I've known the daughter since she was 10 and she has always been a bit of a madam!

[Namechangearamanama]

If it is the full story that is plain daft. I'd been living alone for 2 years by the time I was 19. The hought of even having told my mum never mind asked her to take time of is a weird concept to me.

[MainlyMaynie]

I don't think there's anything wrong with looking after family members, however old they are. I've come home from work to look after DH before and my parents would still look after me if I needed it. My Dad once popped round to clean up a bucket of sick when my DH was away and I couldn't stand up long enough to clean it out! If your boss is usually flexible about letting people and your colleague is usually flexible about staying if needed, then it's really none of your business why she left.

[Namechangearamanama]

I used to work with a guy who would leave work to look after his child if his wife was ill.. I mean, like, a headache or a cold...