why did this woman win custody of her children?

[ManfredMann]

Whose interests were best served when the court awarded custody to this woman?

Follow this link

[StuffingGoldBrass]

Bwhahaha! Look, everybody! It's a 'WhataboutheMenz' knobber!

[FabbyChic]

Is that in the US? because am darn sure that would not happen here.

[BaroqinAroundTheChristmasTree]

no - \link{http://www.smh.com.au/national/mother-wins-custody-battle-after-terrifying-children-about-father-20110103-19dwr.html\it's Australia}

[hobbgoblin]

There is no debate to be had here based on your post since there are virtually no evidential details in that column of grumbles.

However, what I believe is worth debating is whether laws will change so that courts can rule more fairly so that not only does 'mother as carer' cease to be the default position, but also that fathers are legally bound to take more than financial responsibility for their offspring. Though more fathers taking financial responsibility would also be a start...

[ChaoticAngelofAnarchy]

OP what do you know about this case? Other than what the blog says which is basically nothing.

[ManfredMann]

FabbyChic, think again ... check out link at the end of the story in the original link - or here again

[BaroqinAroundTheChristmasTree]

ermm - manfred - follow the first link IN the article. Where it says "in a recent Family Court Decision".

You'll see it takes you to the link I posted - which is in Australia.

[ManfredMann]

ChaoticAngelofAnarchy / HobbGoblin, here's some reports on the cases (in link given in OP):

case 1

case 2 with some other horror stories at the end

case 2

Yep, they are all Australia - but the same thing has happened in the UK case 4

[onlyone]

And I face a court battle with my Ex and his partner for custody of one of the kids ( the non disabled one)

On the basis that they can offer DC a better family life than I as a working Mum can. Also by them taking healthy child I can devote what little time I have to sick disabled child. Also that it would make their life easier as less access issues - not that they say that.

Legal advice is they could win. DCs too young to be given a choice. Disabled child is mentally fine just physically has a few issues.

I have palpitations everytime I see a letter from their solicitors.

these stories make me sick to the stomach.At no point have I ever denied access and at the beginning asked for us all to have a civil conversation about DCs on more than 5 occasions - all refused by OW as she said she wanted things resolved now. well I know what she meant now.

[ManfredMann]

OnlyOne,
Sorry to hear all that. Quite clear that neither sex has the monopoly on being a pain in the a$$ on custody matters. Good luck & as the French would say.

[tallwivglasses]

I haven't read the links yet but just wanted to say onlyone

Do you have a thread about this? Or maybe start one? Sure you'd get some good advice and support.

[huddspur]

Its not a surprise both genders can be highly manipulative

[RobF]

The custody laws are ridiculously biased in favour of women. For a man to get custody there has to be something VERY wrong with the mother, and even then it doesn't always happen.

[WimpleOfTheBallet]

Those links are half stories...they only offer a snippet. No decent conversation or debate can be formed around them.

[Snorbs]

Come on, SGB it's "Mumsnet - By parents, for parents" remember? It's not "Mumsnet - always assume men are wankers or fuck off".

OP yes there are a load of horror stories about child custody decisions. Some are true, some are not, most only tell one side of the story.

It does seem clear that in the majority of cases the only way that a father will get custody is if he can demonstrate the mother is unequivocally unfit. The opposite is almost never the case. And the societal norm where it is the father who goes out to work and the mother who doesn't (or only works part-time) also helps ensure that fathers will lose custody in the event of a relationship break-down.

If it does get to court and the court makes a sole residency order, then the non-resident parent not only sees the children infrequently but also loses many of the rights to involvement in important decisions that the Parental Responsibility legislation gave.

Sadly, groups like Fathers 4 Justice have done fathers no real favours. While their stunts have raised the profile of the issue they've also lost a lot of general sympathy by acting like idiots. And not all of the members are particularly pleasant characters.

It also has to be said that many fathers have given fatherhood a bad name, too. It's not easy to stand up and be heard as wanting more equality in child residency decisions when so many fathers disappear off into the distance and are never heard of again.

Families Need Fathers run a much more inclusive and legitimate campaign but they're also tarred with the same brush as F4J which is a real shame.

The good news is that, in the UK at least, courts are starting to be more willing to make shared residency orders than they used to be. A shared res order doesn't necessarily mean that the child(ren) will necessarily spend a strict 50% of their time with either parent but at least it's redressing the balance a bit.

[Northernlurker]

Onlyone - your ex wants to split up your children and they'd keep the non disabled one? Ugh. That's pretty sickening. Good luck with that fight.

[giyadas]

from the article "We can be a little too precious about children's rights sometimes."
"Upholding children's rights above parental rights is tantamount to giving the lunatics the asylum."
That site is little more than hate speech, you can't expect anyone to take it seriously.