for thinking that the NHS like to flog a dead horse?!

[amijee]

Sorry for the harsh headline but I'm left feeling really sorry for a friend of mine. Her elderly dad is in intensive care following a heart op and everyone is telling the family he is really poorly and unlikely to pull through. And yet he has tubes coming out of every orifice and is being intensively treated, even though the family want to let him die peacefully.

Not only is it upsetting for the family, it is a total waste of tax payer's money.

Why are we trying to make people live forever? Isn't it right to allow someone in their 80's to die peacefully? Or am I being ageist?

[Ormirian]

So the old man is the dead horse is he?

My elderly dad had a major heart op last year. He was 79. He looked like he was dying for days but he did pull through. Don't write him off yet.

[hairytriangle]

Yanbu. My granny begged me not to send her to hospital after about nine strokes and on the tenth, aged ninety, we let her die at home as she wished.

[mosschops30]

As an itu nurse I can tell u that the decision to withdraw rests with the medical team. It will always be discussed with family and patients wishes are also taken into account. But they would not withdraw on someone just because they are old. If he is responding to treatment them they will continue, and rightly so

[mosschops30]

As an itu nurse I can tell u that the decision to withdraw rests with the medical team. It will always be discussed with family and patients wishes are also taken into account. But they would not withdraw on someone just because they are old. If he is responding to treatment them they will continue, and rightly so

[Hammy02]

I think this sort of thing is very much down to the individual. I believe that you should be able to write a living will to say if I get to such a stage, I don't want to be artificially kept alive. Personally, if I was in an accident and was in a vegetative state with little chance of recovery, I would not want to be kept alive. To me, life is for living, not for suffering and burdening others.

[missedith01]

What does the patient think?

[woopsidaisy]

If somebody is terminally ill,or extremely ill,you,the NOK can talk to the Doctors about a DNR/NFR order. This means that they will not try to resuscitate him should the worst happen.
You can refuse treatment.The staff should be talking to her about ths. Of course if someone is very ill,it is not the case that everyone goes to ICU for intensive treatment.The main thing is that your friends Father is as comfortable as possible.I would advise her to talk to family and staff about where they want to go. The NHS does realise that people have to die.Every case is individual.

[WillbeanChariot]

But that was your granny's wish. Does anyone know the patient's wish in this case?
In my experience with elderly relatives health professionals have been sensible and compassionate.

And YABU to say 'the NHS' as a whole when discussing a particular case.

[Ormirian]

I must admit I'd be keen to hear what the patient thinks.

[curlymama]

YABU to say 'the NHS likes flogging a dead horse'

Can you imagine the outcry if they didn't do everything they could to care for a patient, and instead just said, 'oh well, he's old, lets not bother'

The medical team are not caring for this man just for a cheap thrill, it's their job to try and save lives. They can't be expected to make decisions about whether to treat somebody that could recover.

[amijee]

they were my friend's words and not mine and she is a nurse!

[DrSeuss]

Unless he had a DNR or has specifically stated that he does not wish them to do everything possible, then the staff must do this. To do otherwise is simply not their choice to make. How would it work if nurses chose to care for or not care for a person no matter whether that person still wished to fight or not? At the end of my father's life, also in ICU, we were asked if we wished them to continue to prolong his life or not. In the light of what we knew to be his wishes, we said no. But that was our choice, not the choice of the staff, based on our long knowledge of my father's views. If the family of this man really wish for no heroic measures then they should just say so.