To shout at DH this morning??

[Ghostie]

So basically I am pretty on edge DD is four months and has decided that sleep is no longer for her. I am up and down like a yo-yo all night. DH does one feed at 10, but always says things like, "don't you think that I'm awake every minuet you're awake?" Answer - NO! He also doesn't do the nights at the weekends and when I do say to him, your turn, he gets grumpy and then just shoves her dummy in (after stopping off to go to the loo first) and then comes back to bed, so I end up getting up to settle her anyway.

This morning I got up and came into the kichen and he said "ooo, Mummy's grumpy this morning" - I wasn't impressed. When he asked me what was wrong, I explained that I was tired and he told me what I needed to do was go to bed earlier. At which point I snapped and shouted and we had a big row. I explained if I go to bed earlier then I have no time at all to myself or time to get anything done! I didn't want advice like that I just wanted some help, like "you look shattered I'll do tonight!" And the thing is that he doesn't even have to work long hours! He leaves at 9 and can be home between 3-5.30 - my day is much longer!

Sorry rant over!!

[InGodWeTrust]

Hmmm toughie-but I think he has a point-get your head down early it'll make the world seem like an easy hand to play the next day.

But to be on your side, men are mainly pricks. My dh does bath and bed and I get up in the morning and we work it that way (my ds is almost 10 months so a little different). The other way is whoever does the night feeds-the other sleeps in (granted til 8 but still!).

Work out a system that works for you both...and the quicker she's in her own room, the eaasier it'll be for you in a few months time.

[LoveBeingAMummy]

Are you getting any to
e to yourself like a lie in at the weekends? Tbh if you don't put your foot down now you'll never get him doing his bit.

[Ghostie]

No, lovebeingamummy, he says that weekends are his only time for a break! He is good, but sometimes he just sees things from his perspective and I feel a bit like I am left to do it all and take the lead on everything. I know he does have a point and I will be heading to bed soon...anyway must stop moaning!

[LoveBeingAMummy]

No you should not stop moaning, not until he listens. How exactly is he good? When is your time? Has he ever had the baby for a whole day?

[Squitten]

Erm, so when do you get a break? If he is refusing to give you any kind of respite then he's a twat - end of.

[LoveBeingAMummy]

No you should not stop moaning, not until he listens. How exactly is he good? When is your time? Has he ever had the baby for a whole day?

[pointythings]

I'd tell him - on a weekend - that you are going shopping and that 'you'll be fine with the baby, won't you, darling?'.

Stay away for at least 6 hours. If you can, try to make the evening grizzly time part of that 6 hours, so say 1 till 7? Then ask him how it went.

YANBU, you're not moaning, you need to take him in hand now.

(Obviously the above won't work if you're BF, but if you are then possibly even 3 hours will get the message across)